Earl Spencer revelations

[LadyMuckonpancakes]

Just caught something about this online. It sounds horrific.

I was disgusted that the school, Maidwell School, said that the practices he experienced were, sadly, sometimes believed to be normal and acceptable at that time. As someone of that age, I dispute that assertion. If it was that normalised, why was it so hidden? We had a dodgy maths teacher at our school, and everyone discussed it. He didn't last long. It's just making excuses to pretend it was normal or acceptable. It wasn't.

I agree the statement from the school is disgusting. The practices may have been normal within the school, but not outside of it.
The six year child abuse enquiry found lots of sexual abuse in boarding schools both from staff and older pupils.

The statement was appalling but not surprising.

Totally agree. The school should be ashamed of themselves. I would like to know if his abuser is still alive too.

What is the point of revealing such highly personal and disturbing info though? We all know boarding schools decades ago were rife with abuse. They apparently aren't anymore .

Just seems a bit sensationalist to include in a book. Has he named his abuser, ws she reported to the police if not again, what is the point unless just to sell a book.

What is the point of revealing such highly personal and disturbing info though?
Why shouldn't he?
As for boarding schools not being rife with abuse - have a read of this. He was arrested in 2019.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-berkshire-61568602

Presumably because he feels he wants to share his story

I can't understand any parent sending a child off into any of these boarding schools. Seems absolutely sick and twisted to me. It's your job to make sure you protect your child as a parent.

Yes he obviously wants to share it I'm just wondering why. Usually people name abusers and take legal action. To just share this with fairly explicit info seems unnecessary imo. I wonder if he's had therapy? you'd think that would be more useful than appearing on shows like Lorraine to discuss it.

Most boarding schools today are very hot on safeguarding and offer amazing opportunities for the children who attend.
The fact that one man was recently found to be an abuser doesn't mean that every boarding school is the same. There are abusers in every profession.

Maybe he wants to shock parents and others into realising what goes on in boarding schools.
A report was published in March 2022.
*A new report into child sexual abuse has found boarding schools are the “ideal environment for grooming”, with pupils being more dependent on adults around them than in non-residential settings.
The report from the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse said that “for some children, their residential school, in effect, may be their home”.
It goes on to say 'Despite numerous changes and improvements to safeguarding since the complaints of child sexual abuse referenced in the closed residential schools account, children continue to face sexual abuse and sexual harassment in schools,” it said.
The inquiry was told of ineffective safeguarding in schools over the past 20 years and that “the testimonies on the Everyone’s Invited website demonstrate that currently, for children in some schools, sexual abuse and harassment between peers remain endemic”.

I read a book once by a guy who'd grown up in a Barnados home in the 1970s. The man in charge routinely raped and abused the girls, and his sadistic wife threatened to separate them from their siblings if they complained. But that wasn't what horrified me. (They were just filthy subhuman vermin who deserve to burn in hell.) The awful thing was that a young nurse came to work there and was told what was happening by one of the children. She didn't believe her, so that night she switched on the dormitory light and caught him. Unsurprisingly, he then sacked her. Now you'd think she'd go straight to the police. But instead she said goodbye to the girls, gave them her address, vaguely said they could contact her if they liked, and that was it. People just accepted that kind of thing. It was swept under the carpet. They knew it went on, and no doubt disapproved, but there was an attitude of "well, some men are just like that aren't they? Best not to think about it."

I bet sexual abuse was rife in British orphanages right up to the 1990s. God knows how many young people who were abused in such places ended up homeless and then died in a doorway of a heroin overdose. It's evil beyond words.

This happened to someone I know. He never told anyone till he was in his 40s. There was a huge scandal about the school recently, but the behaviour of older boys wasn't mentioned. His marriage broke up over it all, he never recovered.

@Hartley99
Totally agree.
@Veggieburgers
There was a thread on MN recently from a mother whose daughter was having a horrific time in her boarding school - at the hands of the woman who was in charge of her 'house'. She was being bullied, demeaned and sleeping on damp sheets. The child was afraid to report her.

I can see some argument for boarding schools for sporty resilient teens with parents overseas military etc but primary age?

I know two adults who were emotionally damaged by boarding schools neither have been able to form relationships or have children as a result.

I don’t agree that it was accepted behaviour. I worked in care at one time and there was a scandal involving the Warden in charge who was accused of ‘interfering’ with one of the children. He was cleared but in later years it became apparent that he was guilty. It wasn’t swept under the carpet. There was a police investigation.

Why didn't the girl's mother remove her, and report the teacher? My granddaughter attends a prestigious boarding school (on a part boarding basis) and she absolutely loves it.

@Veggieburgers and that sounds like the marketing manager has done their job on you well. I can send my kids on wonderful activities but at the end of the day they come back under my roof and I have control about who they are exposed to.

It is good Earl Spencer is raising awareness about child sexual abuse.

However, the majority of child sexual abuse does not happen in boarding schools which only a very small minority of children attend. The majority happens in homes by relatives. Something like as much as 1 in 10 children experience it. At least, that is what staff in schools and nurseries are taught to look out for.

No, sorry, there's no marketing job involved. I'm often there when my granddaughter comes home as happy as Larry.

@Araminta1003
Agreed. But it seems some people don't want to think that there may be abuse in boarding schools. One person wonders why Charles Spencer had the temerity to write a book about it.

I don’t think it was just in the 70’s. My brothers and I were in boarding school in the 80’s/early 90’s. When they hit my brothers at school they would get a polo if they didn’t cry. Hands up who’s an adult in touch with their feelings after that experience!

Last diary entry of a child who boarded in Wycombe Abbey. Look at what she said about safeguarding.

*A girl who killed herself at a top girls' boarding school told a GP that she was suicidal but was deemed 'low risk' and given a follow-up appointment six weeks later.
Caitlyn Scott-Lee, 16, took her own life in Wycombe Abbey's theatre the night before she was set to sit for a two-hour detention.
Caitlyn was autistic and had become fixated on the 'headmistress' detention', which had been given to her after vodka and a tattoo kit were found in her music locker.

The 16-year-old had been so distraught at the prospect of the detention that she ran away from a choral performance at Eton College where she was due to sing shortly before the Easter holidays on Match 21.
Her last diary entry on the night before she died read: 'F the school. Running away was the best cry out for help I could give and you responded with we'd normally punish you but we know you're already getting punished. Safeguarding my arse.'

@Janiie he was on Laura Kuenssberg's show this morning talking about it (link below). He has had therapy, and needed a lot more after writing the book.

He's a writer - I've read a couple of his history books which are excellent. Why shouldn't he then write about his own life and raise awareness of the terrible things that happened?

Diana's brother says her press attention more dangerous than Kate scrutiny www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-68585686

It is true that the vast majority of child abusers operate in the home.

But, institutionally whether at boarding schools or children's homes where there are many different children coming through make an ideal place for a sadistic person to operate. These offenders are very scary and they are prolific. They choose these places precisely because there are no parents. These are people like Jimmy Saville and a whole host of other people like him. Years later they are exposed. At the time there was no statutory safeguards on who taught in private schools until the late 1990s. The culture of such places where children are separated from their parents is to be considered with a very critical eye imo.