Beyond Adolescence - part 2

[SpanielsGalore]

No point banning coffee, as it didn't work last time. 🙄
Haven't had any cake updates from a while. @VanGoSunflowers Have you stopped baking already? You still had 8 cakes to go to make it economical.

@SpanielsGalore It's absolutely vile. She's a vile little dog. If I could just work out why she does it, I think I could stop her. But I just don't know why.

What if I give you Twatdog and Eris? That seems like a fair offer.

@CoubousAndTourmaIet Twatdog is a crotch sniffer! He'll sit on his bum, put his paws on my tummy and then shove his head into my crotch and stay like that for as long as he wants.

Perhaps it's me...perhaps I am raising defective dogs.

The quick 'browse around the shops' turned into two hours. Not that I mind, it completely exhausted all the dogs - who love nothing more than sitting in coffee shops watching the world go by and getting pats - and me, as I ate so much cake. We came back via the beach again for another walk, and now finally home (over six hours after we left for a quick dog walk). Now I know why I arrived to an empty house on Saturday...it really is very easy to get carried away. 😀

After me being ignored yesterday, my suggestion of a martingale has been very rudely dismissed without addressing me directly at all (superpower, invisiblity) because it's the same as a choke chain. NO it bloody isn't 😡

Fucking hate that thread now.

Anyway, a fun walk on the meadow with some hilarious lead ragging, backwards jumping, head shaking and growling. But I'm not scared any more, it's just play because that's her happy place.
Love her so very much ❤

@CoubousAndTourmaIet I just read that. It was rather rude, wasn't it? It's really not necessarily to completely ignore people on a thread - particularly when they are offering valuable advice. But I frequently butt-heads with that poster for their support of a charity that, if it were not a charity would be condemned as a puppy mill! But I agree, Martingales are not choke chains. Sorry you feel like you can't post on that thread ❤

It's so lovely that Brie has a 'happy place' and that she trust you enough to tell you what it is 😍 Have you got all her Christmas dinner goodies ready?

Thank you @TheHungryHungryLandsharks they seemed to make a point of ignoring me but replying to everyone else. But anyway, I was rude back, which I will probably end up regretting tomorrow 😬 If I'm not here any more you'll know why.

Brie has a bag of Essential lamb & venison, some Naturo & Forthglade tray foods, and she'll have organic roasted carrots & potatoes with that. She also has two bags of Essentials chews and a new tug toy that's like a rope ball with four legs. I imagine your lot will probably have an amazing dinner compared to Brie though. Will they get turkey or do you have goose?

That big field is definitely her happy place, I let her choose where to go and she can do as much sniffing and mooching as she wants. There was a horse being ridden around the perimeter today so she was watching that for a bit in between lead ragging like a rabid wolf.

Hope you have a lovely evening. And a lovely Christmas x

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks It's no good giving me both. DWS would have a winky to suck then. It's bad enough when these lot are in season and it turns into a lesbian love fest, with all the slurping noises. 🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮

Glad you're enjoying your holiday. Lots of cake and beach walks sounds perfect.

@CoubousAndTourmaIet I haven't seen the updates on the other thread. I shall go and have a read. But don't disappear on us. Sounds like they were rude first, so if you were rude back it was justified.

I have done a second coat on three walls. Only one to go and that has a massive window in it, so hopefully won't take long. I'd have got it finished today if I hadn't spent all morning on MN. 🤦‍♀️

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks if it makes you feel better, I've discovered that when Bill is humpy, and I don't give him his sex chicken, he humps me until he audibly farts a few times. I am his farty sex chicken.

😂😂😂😂
I thought you were going to say he humps until he does something else, so farting was a bit of a relief.

@Bupster I really wished I had not read that at the same time I took a big swig of water. The phrase 'I am his farty sex chicken' should never be mentioned again!! When I read it, I immediately thought of one of those plastic chickens that make funny noises and then had images of this faceless woman dressed as one whilst Bill humped him😂

I'm so curious as to this sex chicken though? Is it one of those big child-toy ones off amazon that I linked ages ago? I haven't seen any photos of the sex chicken (with or without Bill - bit concerned that if Bill is included in the photo it might break Talk Guidelines somehow).

@SpanielsGalore oh it's awful isn't it? Thankfully mine don't do it too much but I would much rather their slurping than DWS (which shall forever be her nickname for). I've been watching her this evening, and she's acting like such a sweetheart - curled up on DD1s lap, head burrowed into her tummy, letting out little snores.

I reallyyy want to see a photo of your kitchen when it's done.

@CoubousAndTourmaIet Brie's dinner sounds a lot better than what my dogs will have! Pen and Twatdog will have their usual food - they both have delicate tummies, so I don't want to risk them having something that might make them sick. The eldest two will get a full roast (we do chicken) and DWS will have her puppy food.

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks he looks tiny on that photo for some reason but he weighs 16kg!

@BupsterVinny audibly farts when he humps too. It’s the only time it ever makes a noise! On that note, happy birthday 🤣

Vinny audibly farts when he humps too. It’s the only time it ever makes a noise!

Just in case anyone thinks the way to avoid this is to have girls - it's not! Both my girls do the same.

Dog always look surprised when he farts.

‘Farty sex chicken’ is definitely up there with – what was it, @Nella68 and @YorkshireFelix, as I feel this is of your vintage – ‘pissy trousers’? Or something equally as vile about boy dogs.

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks Eris’ habit sounds absolutely revolting if I may say. Have you ever observed a dog doing that before?! Sounds utterly bizarre.

@brushingboots yes, he’s a typical male. His human self would piss on the seat and on the floor. I’m just thankful he doesn’t lick humans, as he likes to lick his ‘pissy trousers’ 🤢

@brushingboots I’ve only seen it in young dogs/puppies taken from mum too early and usually in much smaller breeds! And obviously she wasn’t taken too given Pen is right here and she was the one who proactively stopped feeding from Pen to start with!

I had wondered if it was a nervous thing - going under them to try and protect her neck a bit, but honestly she’s not the least bit timid. So I’ve just decided she’s a nasty pervert.

Happy birthday for yesterday @Bupster i was so distracted by the sex duck I forgot! I hope Bill got you something nice?!

@YorkshireFelix ohh he’s a chunky boy! He doesn’t look at all fat though so must be muscle? How was your shopping spree?

MIL made me smile this morning. Satan has a dog bed (not that she uses it - she’s a sofa and bed dog), and I caught MIL making it up and tucking in the blanket, putting a cushion down etc. Then Satan came along, kicked it all up, turfed the blankets out of the bed, grabbed the cushion and tossed it around a bit before she discarded it on the floor, and then jumped on the sofa 😂 Poor MIL looks so heart broken.

@brushingbootsVinny gets pissy belly 🤢 So disgusting. Thankfully not as much nowadays so he must have learnt how to aim!

Farty sex chicken
Pissy trousers
Winky sucker
Pissy belly

DELIGHTFUL!! I think there’s some angel dogs here (aka Pupsy and Brie) who would never dream of partaking in such sordid activity.

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks Our trip into Leeds wasn’t too bad actually - it wasn’t quiet by a long stretch but it wasn’t heaving which I was surprised about. I was happy to have a dog free day!

Your poor MIL that is so funny 🤣🤣🤣 Satan living up to her name.

I agree, Pupsy and Brie seem to be the standout good dogs on this thread 😀

@YorkshireFelix I bet V was so happy to see you when you returned! Glad it wasn't too busy either - perhaps this year people have realised not to leave it all to the last minute!?

I made the mistake of going out earlier (forgot the runner beans in the food order) and it was heaving in the supermarket. I will never understand why Christmas food shopping appears to be a family event. I must have passed at least a dozen men wandering around looking lost and confused and peeping over the tops of other shoppers - clearly trying to find their wife/partner. I was half expecting tannoy announcements 'Can Edward please head to the Customer Service Desk. Your wife is waiting for you.'😂

It's always been Satan's 'thing' - she likes going around and scuffing up the covers or carpets or cushions. She'll push blankets and cushions and pillows off the bed or sofa. MIL still seems to be convinced that she just needs to make the bed the 'right' way and Satan will get into it. I think it's because all my dogs will get into nicely made dog beds, and lay there and look happy...but that's more because they lack the spunk that Satan has rather than because they're actually happy!

Brie is indeed an angel, but I have no idea how, because her human mummy is most definitely not 😬 Sorry for my strop, got my comeuppance as I have a blinding migraine and feel really sick.

Rosie used to do the farty humping thing and she ate poo, dug up the garden, shredded a carpet, so clearly Brie's well-trained paragon of virtue status is not down to me in any way.

My chap did a lunchtime dash to the local Morrisons for essentials so now we won't budge out, aside from doing early walks with Brie.

There's a hints for big dogs thread started up, and I can't actually think of a single useful or constructive thing to say on it 😂

Oops, posted on that earlier if you’re referring to the lurcher/retriever cross post. Mind you, posted fairly standard advice.

Did anyone watch the Horse of the Year show (on player)? They had the small dog agility on last night. I’m not usually a huge fan of crossbreeds , but the Border Paps ( (or Collie paps) were sweet (collie/papillion, basically a small collie with larger ears).

@Silverbirchleaf I watched that - they were incredibly cute, weren't they?

@CoubousAndTourmaIet The thing is, so much advice for big dogs is also applicable to smaller dogs! The only specific advice I think can think of would be about not putting too much pressure on joints and when to neuter...but OP seemed to want advice about cleaning and smells and, honestly, I am the last person to give that advice to anyone. I revel in the Golden fur and snoot juice.

Sorry you've got a rotten headache ❤And I didn't think it was a strop at all! Your chap was brave for doing the Morrisons dash - I had to psych myself up with coffee and cake before I went. I'm still shuddering now, over an hour after I returned home!

Yes, it was that thread @Silverbirchleaf , I did comment on the Leonberger fluff but that was all. It's probably a good thing if I stop trying to offer people advice anyway.

We used to love watching The Horse of the Year show. When I was young, my mum and I were both avid watchers of show jumping and eventing. My mum had the hots for the Irish jumper, Eddie Macken 😆Haven't watched it for many years though. I can't watch dog agility without worrying about dogs getting injured, which I know is very silly, because they're mostly small-medium dogs, and very agile but my heart is always in my mouth.

Ah, same here @TheHungryHungryLandsharks , can't worry about mess and smells with a houseful of Maine Coons, that's for sure 😉

Trying to decide whether I'm up to a walk just now with this head, or if DP can be persuaded to take her at 3. I'll bribe him with a pot of coffee and a piece of Christmas cake.

@CoubousAndTourmaIet i had to hunt to find it this year, and found one programme on BBC2 and some on IPlayer. In one competition, 70 year John Whittaker was competing against a 20 year old ! (The 20 year old won).

I’m still abit nervous when Dog does the A-frame and sea-saw. The sea-saw lands with such a noisy clunk.

Sorry, haven’t caught up on the thread properly yet but can I just vehemently agree with this statement

I agree, Pupsy and Brie seem to be the standout good dogs on this thread

Seeing as Pablo earned the nickname ‘rat breath’ after his antics last weekend.

Ahem. As you were.

Who would have ever thought that a Pyrenean would be one of the standout good dogs 😮 Nobody is more surprised than me.

Hope you've shaken off that flu and forgiven Pablo for the rat swallowing episode.