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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Honesty please - getting a puppy

107 replies

Wiggleyfingers · 28/08/2024 22:38

We've been desperate for a dog for a long time but never done it due to two reasons and would love some thoughts on these from people who have been through it.

Issue 1:
Family set up is 2 adults working full time and 2 children.
The dog would be left home alone for 2 days per week between hours of 7:30-4:30 (Mondays and Fridays if that makes a difference?!) On these days, I can pop back on my lunch break for around 45 minutes. Is this going to be an issue with a puppy? If so, for how long? We may be able to get a dog walker in the morning on those days to break the day up further.

Issue 2:
How much time off did you have when getting a puppy? I'm a teacher, so limited to school holidays. Would a week off in October be too short of time? Do we need to wait until Christmas? Is getting a puppy with toilet training during winter a bad idea?! Am I overthinking everything now?

Any advice welcome!

OP posts:
Karmaisac4t · 28/08/2024 22:42

You would need someone with the puppy on a Monday and Friday not just a dog walker once, it’s too long for a puppy to be left, for a good while. Would a doggy day care near you be an option?

if I’m honest, with your situation as you’ve described I wouldn’t get a puppy.

id try and rehome a dog who is more used to having time alone, but even then you’d need the dog walker Monday and Friday, and you may struggle to get a rescue because of your working hours and having kids.

sorry OP.

Elizo · 28/08/2024 22:46

I think you need a good few months before you can leave a puppy for a length of time, possibly 6.,Have you got family or friends who can help?

schloss · 28/08/2024 22:47

Too long to leave a puppy or an adult dog. Be realistic and wait until you will be at home more.

Elizo · 28/08/2024 22:47

Ps you would need a dog walker on the days you are out. And a decent walk to tire the dog

Prriorayingly · 28/08/2024 22:50

I don’t think you should get a puppy. It takes months to properly housetrain them and they need company and games. You can’t just leave them.

Elizo · 28/08/2024 22:50

Sorry so many posts. I have a 4yo I would not want to leave her 730-430 with just a midday walk regularly. It’s a long time for them to be alone. Not sure what others think. For that amount of time you need daycare or a friend who can take them

LokiCokey · 28/08/2024 22:51

You need a good couple of weeks off to help a puppy settle. It's like having a newborn that's simultaneously a toddler...

Itsabitweirdinhereinnit · 28/08/2024 22:51

You couldn’t get even an adult rescue dog with those working hours. I know a lot of them expect far too much, but that’s a completely unreasonable amount of time to leave a dog, let alone a puppy. I’d look into rehoming something older and putting it into some sort of doggy daycare place. That’s too long to even just get a walked in once a day

stayathomer · 28/08/2024 22:52

I’m sorry you’re not overthinking it- a young puppy is like a child. You leave them alone that long even in a fully dog proofed room you’ll come home to poo and pre and hyperness and him being uncontrollable. Do you have family/ neighbours who could drop in a few days or could you do doggy daycare?

hardtocare · 28/08/2024 22:52

You asked for honesty... I wfh 24/7, we walk him 2-3 times a day, had a behaviourist and 2y on if I could go back and not get him I would.

We'll stick with our commitment but don't do it unless you can't live without a pup

GrumpyMiddleAgedCow · 28/08/2024 22:53

07:30-16:30 is unfortunately too long for even an adult dog never mind a puppy to be left so you would need a dog walker plus your lunch visit. The only other thing I would say is when toilet training through the day I always tend to let the dog out every hour through the day and start with 4 alarms through the night to let the dog out then slowly go down but it does take (depending on the breed and their nature) 3-6months so you will need to be able to commit to that. Xx

ComeOnThenFanny · 28/08/2024 22:54

There's no way you can leave a puppy for that amount of time for months and months - and even then, even with popping home for lunch, it's just not suitable. Quite apart from having to literally look after them like they're a baby - it's not fair on the dog at all. Dogs need company.

GrumpyMiddleAgedCow · 28/08/2024 22:54

Also the winter for toilet training in my experience has been easier because they need to pee in the cold but you need longer than the 2 weeks school holidays x

myfitbitisfucked · 28/08/2024 22:55

No to a dog let alone a puppy in those circumstances

ComeOnThenFanny · 28/08/2024 22:56

In fact, mine are 18 months old now, and the longest I have ever left them is 3 hours. I'm lucky enough to work from home, or I wouldn't have got them.

Rescue2024 · 28/08/2024 22:58

Having a puppy in the house is like having a newborn baby who can run around the house.

it’s hard work, a puppy needs constant supervision for a long time and then they hit the adolescent stage and it gets worse.

its so worth it if you have the time to give to them, which I don’t think you have.

DDog is nearly 5 and the best dog I’ve ever owned. It took lots of supervision and time in the early days though and that’s really important.

so I’d say no.

Sunflowers098 · 28/08/2024 22:59

When you get a puppy someone needs to be with it pretty much constantly if you are going to toilet train it and give it the company and socialisation it needs. You need to build up gradually to leaving it alone for a few hours over a period of months not days... If you leave a puppy alone from 7:30-4:30 it will be miserable, incredibly stressed, you will not sort out toilet training ( they need to go out for a wee every half hour or so) It will be destructive as an outlet for its stress, you will almost certainly create a dog with separation anxiety and behaviour problems.
A quick visit at lunchtime or even a dog walker popping in for an hour is not going to be good enough .
And after a few months of it barking and howling when you're not there, weeing on your floors because it's not toilet trained, chewing up your house because it's stressed and bored and the neighbours complaining about the noise you'll be rehomiing it.

Please please don't do this, you will end up with a miserable puppy and then a damaged dog.
Sorry OP but that's the truth of it. It's good that you're asking and haven't just gone ahead and done it.

Redwood48 · 28/08/2024 22:59

Please don't get a puppy and leave it for that length of time, it's really not fair and it will be incredibly lonely, even with a dog walker popping in.

I have 3 dogs, they're all older and very settled and I still wouldn't leave them for that length of time. My husband and I arrange our work schedules so that they never have to be left for more than 4 hours and that's on a bad day! We alternate WFH to ensure one of us is around all day 95% of the time.

As much as you want a dog, you're not set up for it right now.

Singleaftermarriage · 28/08/2024 23:00

I'm a teacher. I would get one for the summer hols. It is incredibly hard work. I had students asking if I was OK in the early days I looked so awful. It is very tough. I would say that it wasn't until my dog got to 18 months that he calmed down. He is 4 now and great. Really calm in the house. OK on his own. Doesn't ever do anything wrong in the house. I'm now a single parent and it is tough fitting in walks but I also have my mum who helps. Good luck

holeingummy · 28/08/2024 23:01

Too long. Our dog is 6 and only left 9-3.30, 3 days a week. She has a dog walker for 1.5 hours during that time, a dog flap so she can go in and out of the garden and my family will pop in and see her for 10 minutes if they're passing. She could only be left a max of maybe 4 hours once she got to around 6 months old and then we gradually increased it. With the dog walker coming, she's only on her own for 4 ish hours 3 days a week when I work. We are home every other day with her. And I still feel guilty on those 3 days!

Deadringer · 28/08/2024 23:04

We just got a puppy. She is very good, but she is a baby, we have to get up very early in the morning to bring her out for a wee, out again every half hour or so, we don't leave her on her own for more than a few minutes at a time. In your circumstances I would get a slightly older dog as pp suggested.

Costacoffeeplease · 28/08/2024 23:09

Absolutely not. Would you leave a baby that long?

PenguinLove1 · 28/08/2024 23:09

I have a three year old dog and the longest I can leave her is 4 hours or so, and it took 1.5-2 years to be able to do that - for the first 3-6 months i could barely leave her 15 mins without her crying and howling - you would have a severely distressed dog if you left it after a week for a full day. Remember you get them at 8 weeks old - they are just a baby and need you to look after them not leave them all day. And around 9 months they become teenagers and can be destructive if alone and full of energy.

Toilet training needs someone there all the time too - honestly as a teacher the only way to make this work is to get one at the very beginning of your summer holidays so that you have 7 weeks with them all the time to nail toilet training and work on basic training, then have either a relative take them on the days you are working, or book a doggy day care for those days - there are some really great ones which would tire them out and socialise them.

The first week with my puppy i was still up multiple times in the middle of the night, i cant imagine then going to work and leaving them alone, it is like a newborn so you would quickly regret it.

Puppies are super cute but really hard work in the first year, dont underestimate it.

Redwood48 · 28/08/2024 23:11

I should also add that I'm not sure if you realise just how much of a huge commitment it is. Have you ever had a dog before?

If you're a teacher then you already have a busy, demanding job, plus kids. A puppy and even grown up dogs tbh are bloody hard work, they need so much.

I was out playing ball in the garden at 8.30pm with my 14 yr old dog who was pestering me!

It's just a massive commitment for so many reasons imo. Too many people do it without thinking it through but hopefully you'll take on board the advice that everyone is giving.

DogDogGoose · 28/08/2024 23:12

Took 3 months to settle mine. No guarantees a pup will ever be happy alone if you get one with separation anxiety. You need to consider and budget for daycare when you’re not home