Honesty please - getting a puppy

[Wiggleyfingers]

We've been desperate for a dog for a long time but never done it due to two reasons and would love some thoughts on these from people who have been through it.

Issue 1:
Family set up is 2 adults working full time and 2 children.
The dog would be left home alone for 2 days per week between hours of 7:30-4:30 (Mondays and Fridays if that makes a difference?!) On these days, I can pop back on my lunch break for around 45 minutes. Is this going to be an issue with a puppy? If so, for how long? We may be able to get a dog walker in the morning on those days to break the day up further.

Issue 2:
How much time off did you have when getting a puppy? I'm a teacher, so limited to school holidays. Would a week off in October be too short of time? Do we need to wait until Christmas? Is getting a puppy with toilet training during winter a bad idea?! Am I overthinking everything now?

Any advice welcome!

3 months off work, that is

If you want to crack toilet training then you need to be home for weeks so the start of the summer holidays would be best . How do you plan to contain the pup whilst you are at work as you cannot cage for all that time during the day .

We got a puppy 4 weeks ago. Also a teacher and back to work in a week. Will be out of the house 8-4:30 once a week (very part time!). We have a dog walker coming around 11 and parents/in-laws coming around 2:30 on their way to school pick up, each for half an hour. No idea if it will be enough and how it will go.
The last 4 weeks have been tough but we've already seen so much progress and he's the loveliest little thing. We used to have a dog when I was growing up, she was on her own from 9am til 4pm. Nobody popped in, just totally on her own. She was fine. I know plenty of friends and family who have dogs who do less than we are planning on doing during the day so fingers crossed it's ok for him. We just need to work up to it over the next week, he can do around an hour on his own, a couple of times a day now. So just building on that. 🤞

You can't go out and leave a puppy for hours just after getting one. In fact, you shouldn't do that to any dog.

Possible but definitely plan it for next summer holidays. at 14 weeks a pup is likely to still be having the odd accident in the home.

on your days out the house count on needing full day care for quite a while. There are loads of people who do dog daycare in their homes, that might work better than daycare centres with a really young pup.

it takes quite a lot of effort to train most puppies to be OK with being left and some will always find it hard. Some will whine and bark and chew and destroy your house so you do have to be prepared if you end up with this sort of dog, that it may never be able to be left for any length of time and will always need daycare.

any puppy you can get at 6 weeks’ notice is probably not a puppy you want. You need to do research and find a good breeder, wait for litter etc.

Defiantly more than a week! When we got pup, someone was home continually for the first few weeks, and when we did start going out, it was just quick school runs etc. We built up the time we left her gradually, once she was house trained (fortunately, quite easy with her, but it was summer and we had doors open/ spent a lot of time outside with her).

Dog is now three. We do occasionally leave her for 4-5 hours with the neighbour popping in to let her out/ give her a fuss, and we have left her for longer with a friend additionally taking her for a walk. For our regular work days, though, she goes to doggy daycare as it's just too long for her to be left, even now.

You would be better off with a dog day care on the once a week, a puppy shouldn’t be left that long with only two half an hour breaks.

A week?!!!! Dear god. And no, you can't leave a puppy alone for that length of time.

Avoid, avoid, and avoid al all costs! I can't emphasise this enough

@bluesky45 this is mad and verging on cruel, how is your puppy ever going to be house trained? Never mind all their other developmental needs. Poor pup

Can't you see the flawed logic in this?
The dog you grew up with was left alone and 'was fine'. How exactly do you know this? The fact that it wasn't chewing up the house doesn't mean that it wasn't unhappy or bored. Nor does it mean that another dog would be 'fine' with being left.
And the fact that you know people who do less than you plan to do - does that make it okay? Do you normally set your standards by other people's questionable behaviour? Plenty people get dogs and leave them in cages all day when they are at work. The fact that this happens doesn't make it okay 🙄

I'm a teacher, but husband is retired, so home all day. Nonetheless, we got our puppy at the beginning of August, so there would be another adult on hand. We've had dogs all our lives, so knew what we're letting ourselves in for:

• it is not fair to leave a puppy alone for hours at a time unless you have a dog flap, secure garden, and it's occasional. You need to wait until the summer.
• Training a puppy is about constant repetition. You really need someone at home during the day to do some training, feed regular meals, let them out etc.
• Socialising a puppy is time consuming. They need to be introduced to traffic, children, crowds etc and they need company and activity for most of the day.
• Some breeds are easier to train, less prone to separation activity - they may also be the ones that need the most exercise.
• it takes a lot of time to raise a well behaved sociable dog - mistakes in the first year take a long time to train out.

Good god no. Cruel beyond belief. Would you leave a baby that long?

Id do the sensible thing and wait until the next summer holidays to get a puppy now if I you were. A week at Halloween isn't enough and Xmas is chaotic enough without adding a new puppy in the mix. They are quite hard work, especially the house training which took about 3/4 weeks with our dog, lucky I know, as some dogs take much longer. I was very on the ball and consistently took her out all the time however. She wasn't left alone in the first few months of her life, I had family who I could take her to even needed so she had company, we also crated her over night for the first few weeks. She's 7 now and can easily go a day at home if needed without any bother, such as if we were out for the day as a family, but id still ask someone to pop round to let her out and spend half an hour with her. Unless you've had a dog before please don't underestimate how much time and attention they require.

You need at least 8 weeks home with a new pup in my experience. Get one at the start of the summer holidays and then get your partner to take 2 weeks off work when you go back to school. After that on a Monday and Friday you will need a dog walker morning and afternoon, plus you returning home at lunch time so it's day is broken up a little as leaving a young dog home alone is not easy for them. Also on Monday and Friday I would also walk the dog before leaving for work so it is likely to sleep until the dog walker arrives for the first walk. Tuesday to Thursday will whoever is home be working? A pup is not going to quietly snooze whilst you work - it will need a lot of attention throughout the day.

Definitely too long to leave a puppy or an adult dog. And if you try to leave a puppy for that long (even with a dog walker and a lunch break) you will be causing huge behavioural issues - it’s just not fair on the dog. Also, when they are puppies you really need to be taking them out to toilet every 20-40 minutes (and several times overnight). We waited until I was WFH (and freelance so no chance of having to go into an office) before getting a dog (even though we’d wanted one for about 6 years!) and it was still a huge amount of work. As a PP said it’s like having a baby that’s also a toddler..

I had two litters with my fully health tested golden retriever. I had a long questionnaire for prospective owners, and I'm afraid you wouldn't have passed due to your working hours. Have you considered an older dog? One who may be used to being left? A puppy really can't handle being left, and you'd be creating a difficult situation and potentially a disturbed dog with life-long behavioural problems. Perhaps it would be wise to go to a reputable animal shelter like Dogstrust or the RSPCA and fill out their rehoming form. Their restrictions are there for a reason, and it's highly unlikely they'd let you have a puppy. It would be good to chat to them about your working situation to get a professional insight. They don't want dogs returned to them, that is why they have these rules, to ensure a puppy or dog's wellbeing.

My dog is now 9 years old, but his puppyhood nearly broke me. If I'd left him for that long, his separation anxiety meant that I'd be coming home to shit and piss all over.
You have to be 'on it'.
I'm also in Education and the shortest holiday I'd do it in is Easter. There's too much else going on at Christmas. Summer break would be ideal.
I remember I organised an appointment a few days after bringing him home as a pup. I ended up cancelling as I had been extremely naive about being able to leave him!
I don't know if every pup is as needy, but I couldn't go to the toilet without him following me.
I adore my dog. He's the best. But Jesus, I think of those days and shudder! I'm a single parent of 3 though, and doing it on my own was so much harder.

hi op, you asked for honesty. I adore my dog but if I could go back in time I would never have got a dog. He’s 4 in October and i was 42 when we got him and he’s the first dog I’ve ever had in my life and it was a bloody shock!!

my ds was turning 18 and he’s autistic and has been obsessed with having a husky since he was a toddler and begged for one so we got the most beautiful puppy and he ruined the carpets within days, chewed my brand new ( 1 week old ) couch and had us up the wall and I was and still am a SAHM so he’s never had to be left. Ds promised to do his fair share of the walking etc and then went off to university not long after and our dog needs 3 walks a day which he gets but dp and I both have chronic pain and he’s a big boy. He sheds his fur like you wouldn’t believe and I love the bones of him but my god I found myself googling “how long do huskys live?” and knew it was the wrong decision and I am very ashamed I did that.

what would I do differently in hindsight and if ds wasn’t obsessed with having a husky?

i would get a non shedding dog.
I would get a smaller dog ( he pulls me terrible )
I would say no to getting a dog!!

he’s bloody adorable and I wouldn’t be without him now but I will NEVER get another dog. Dd said we’re going to be cat ladies.

I'd never get a puppy because it's months if not years of hard work raising them to adulthood and it sounds awful TBH. I would also never leave a dog all day. If you do get a dog then do it in the summer holidays so they have time to get settled then once you're back at work you need to pay for dog sitting for 2 days a week. Our doggy daycare is £30 a day so it would be a big financial commitment but you have to factor this in if you get a dog while working out of the home. Leaving a dog at home all day is just not an option.

It's a hard no from me. Our awful NDNs have a now four year old midsize dog who is traumatised from a total lack of care as a puppy. Almost from the beginning they began leaving it alone for hours at a time and the poor mite just cried the whole time which was utterly heartbreaking to listen to. Fast forward to now and half the time the dog gets left alone all day while the evil ones are at work, never walked except for occasionally 20 mins in the evening. It barks and goes mental every time the doorbell goes. And that's not the half of it. Our DC are desperate for a dog but it's for this reason that we are regretfully not going ahead with it. I work from home a lot but my hours of being outside the home are too unpredictable to make it work. One thing we have considered is fostering a guide dog which might be worth looking into if you are near a training centre. The dogs go to guide dog school M-F during the daytime. But the placements are short - something like 15 weeks so you would have be prepared for saying goodbye again before too long...

Have you considered a cat instead. It would suit your working hours better.

Could you look into day care in a home for pup? I have one who has been coming to me since he was 14weeks. He is dropped off on way to work and picked up on way back. I helped toilet train and socialise him etc. He is literally treated like one of my gang when he is here so I do leave him to go out for an hour etc so he doesn’t get used to constant attention. I wouldn’t put a young pup into group day care ( the sort with a big field where they run wild all day).
One week is not enough/ you need a good month or two to bond with puppy, establish routine and start training.

I would ADORE a dog but my lifestyle doesn't allow it. Single person in a flat working shifts. Not much support. The dog would be miserable. So I don't plan to have one until probably retirement, which is a long way off. Having looked into it, I'd rather get a young dog from a shelter than endure puppyhood. Puppies need the leader of their herd to be around constanty. I think unless one person can be at home with a dog all day, don't get a dog.