On the verge of rehoming, please advise - Experienced lab owners especially 🙏

[LabHelpPlease]

As title...

Lab is a gorgeous 10 month old dog. There are many practical reasons for rehoming and the main reason not to is simply that I love him.

Won't go into all the ins and outs, the general gist is that our 6yo dd is profoundly autistic and based on experience with a therapy dog at school we thought it would be a potentially huge benefit. Reality is they are mostly kept apart as dog is just too bouncy and boisterous. Have sought advice from a trainer and behaviourist who both say dog is normal for his age, vet slightly disagreed and said he is very excitable and boisterous - too excited to listen.

We are first time dog owners and ultimately think we have bitten off more than we can chew. If I'm really honest not sure we are completely meeting the dogs needs, though not for lack of trying.

Yes, we have been terribly naive and no doubt made many mistakes. I suppose my question to experienced lab owners is - is it normal for a lab of this age to jump up and snap near your face in excitement? Do tthey actually become less excitable? Or should we accept that we are not the right family for this dog?

I know how these threads normally go but I couldn't feel worse than I already do 😭

The other reason this is coming to a head now is that the majority of his walking/training is done during school hours and obviously the summer holidays are fast approaching.

The thing is, you can't expect him to behave around your daughter if you never do any training around her in the first place.

Dog training needs to be done everywhere, everyday - you can't just train him alone at home and expect him to understand that he also needs to do X in Y situation too.

Training a dog to be calm around a child has to happen around a child - obviously using measures like leads etc. for safety and to prevent anyone from accidentally getting hurt or scared.

I see someone else has asked how much exercise he is actually getting, and I also see you say his walks are during school hours usually, does that mean he doesn't get an evening walk ?

Make sure you choose a ' no destruction ' dog rescue i.e. stay away from Battersea Dogs home etc. despite their tv programmes they do have a destruction policy and if one digs deep into them the figures are there to find :(

First route to take is to see if his breeder will accept him back, a decent one will but many don't.

You already have one suggestion of a Lab rescue, If you were in Wales I would suggest Many Tears

You could ask the behaviourist if s/he has any suggestions as s/he has met the dog. S/he may know of someone looking for a dog.
( My dog groomer always knows of someone looking for a small dog, and has been very successful in finding suitable dogs for her clients :)

That's a fair comment. It is not where I wanted to be at all. I guess we're now trying to weigh up which is the lesser poor outcome- rehome now to a family that can devote more time/training or struggle on?

Rehoming isn’t necessarily traumatic, especially for a Lab. They attach themselves to new people very easily.

When we went on holiday we boarded ours with a woman who looks after dogs in her own home. She said he was completely attached to her within a day and I could well believe it. When I collected him ( even the first time) he was excited to see me but clearly very comfortable in her home and with her.

On subsequent stays he started wagging his tail as we drove up to her house and was excited to see her again.

OP - did you see this kind offer?

Op, our first lab was the most docile, sweet natured angel. It even she jumped up a lot until about the age of two.

Our current one is 100% from working lines and by God he was like a hurricane at first. Now he’s two, he’s starting to settle down but yeah, the first couple of years have been a roller coaster especially as I was taken by surprise after the easy ride we got with our first. Luckily, I have some experience of boisterous labs as our family dog when I was growing up was an absolute monkey.

Now our boy is starting to settle down I’m starting to see the absolute diamond that we have invested money and time into. He’s cuddly, affectionate, loving and loyal. He’s still an absolute pillock at times but I’m so pleased we picked him.

He has a longer walk during school hours then a shorter 30-40 minute walk in the evening.

We have been implementing what the behaviourist and trainer said but not as often/consistently as she recommended. This is not due to being lazy, it is circumstance.

You are absolutely right about the training needing to happen around dd, unfortunately we didn't consult the behaviourist until relatively recently, with hindsight this should all have been happening much earlier.

I've reached out to the behaviourist re rehoming and she said she'll see what she can do.

' When he was doing it to the behaviourist she stood calmly and ignored him, and actually said there is no aggression in him at all. '

She has met him and didn't find him aggressive, she can truthfully tell a potential adopter what she thought/found.

assuming she is a decent qualified professional, she should know what she is doing, hopefully she may come up with a home for him.

as i already said professionals can be good at finding homes...

Is he going to puppy school regularly?

Are you training him specifically as a therapy dog?

A dog is like another child. Lots of work.

I volunteer at an animal rescue, we are coming down with labs. I wouldn't believe other posters who say they'll quickly be rehomed. This dog is your responsibility, grow up and put the time in to train them better.

We have been implementing what the behaviourist and trainer said but not as often/consistently as she recommended. This is not due to being lazy, it is circumstance.

If you can't put in the training and work then I think you're doing the right thing by looking at getting him re-homed.

You are at the worst stage of puppy hood. The teen years! Keep going with the training, and it will get better! Can you enlist any friends to give you a hand with training? Also if you are in the southeast I can recommend an amazing trainer who also does residential training with the dog then training sessions with you after.

Yes, because it's that easy. Except it's not.

To a pp that mentioned residential training, we considered this but the behaviourist was very against it. She said you can't ever be sure of the methods used.

stay away from residential training, your puppy does not deserve that !

Aww bless you. He is still very much a puppy in an adult body and will take many more months to calm down and train. Training is a marathon not a sprint and you think you are putting everything in and getting nothing out...until one day you do. This is non linear though. My dog is 20 months now and mostly a dog and a lovely one but still forgets herself sometimes.

Puppies are 99.9% management and waiting for them to grow the heck up tbh. Residential training isn't going to help.

If you want a dog then hang in there. Separation is pretty normal. If you don't then rehoming or returning is the best option and a well bred and lovely bouncy lab will move on very quickly. Please don't feel bad.

If you can’t manage a lab please do not consider getting a smaller dog because you think it will be easier.
I have a one year old lab and a three year old King Charles cavalier which someone said up thread is an amazing family dog.
That’s true (our current cav is our third) and I love him beyond words but he is infinitely more work and tests my patience more than my lab. My lab can have one big walk a day then be completely chill for the rest of the time. I call her my angel dog.
The cav is full of character but very ‘spaniel’ and wired to the moon a lot of the time despite long walks. He’s always busy. Barks at noises etc. have never heard my lab bark.
Smaller is not necessarily easier, even the more chilled smaller breeds.

Very experienced lab owner here. This is normal puppy behaviour, especially for a lab. They are known for being "lively" but they are also extremely clever and learn very quickly. With proper training you will have a wonderful dog. Why do you think they choose them as guide dogs?

I should add that "snapping" is not normal, are you sure he's not just at the "mouthy" stage, which is completely normal behaviour at this age.

@NeverHadHaveHas

it was me that suggested KCCS are lovely family dogs.

but no I do not suggest or recommend this family get another dog, they don't have the time or energy to commit to having another puppy.

p.s. we considered a KCCS once, daughter wanted one. We chose a Japanese Chin instead :)

someone much further up mentioned Japanese Chins amongst other small breeds.

But no, I do not suggest nor recommend the Op gets another dog.

Hi OP, I’ve owned labs and grew up with them and that’s very normal. They normally calm down after they’re 2 years old. They also need a lot of exercise and walks - 3 good walks a day would be ideal. I’m sorry it’s so difficult at the moment.

This is pretty much what the behaviourist said!

Just taken him out. He was great walking loose lead, managed to ignore 2 passerby and came when I called him. But, I found a quiet path and thought I'd practise some basic obedience and he may as well have been deaf! I'm not sure I'm cut out for this.

As someone else said, dog training isn't linear - you need to expect good days and bad days, good moments and bad. If he can walk to a loose lead, recall to you and ignore other dogs then you must be doing something right. Lots of fully grown adult dogs can't manage that!

I wonder if you're actually just feeling overwhelmed - the prospect of your first proper summer with your DD and your dog might just be quite scary? Which is understandable, but if he can already do all of what you say, I really don't think that things are as bleak as you describe.

For those of you recommending other breeds and those of you saying not to get another one - we wouldn't. If we do rehome our lab we will not be getting another dog. It's been a very steep learning curve. I thought I'd researched and was prepared but the reality was not what I thought. I suppose it's a bit like how you think you are a perfect parent - til you become one...

That is a teenage dog. Don't ask if you know you won't get. Manage instead (long line).

When training you always work from low distraction areas to high. So start in the most boring room in the house, then more exciting, then garden, then quiet place, busier place etc, only moving on when you have nailed it in the last place. You also have to make it way easier too in the new place and go backwards if you need to.

Dogs get in the habit of ignoring you. So keep him on a long line until to prevent this else he just learns 'fuck it I don't need to come back'.

Honestly this is all normal puppy/adolescnet/young dog stuff and it WILL get better but you do need to keep on plodding on and grit your teeth a bit.