Please recommend a dog for our family

[abairliom]

Good morning
We have decided to welcome a dog to our family.
I never had a dog at home growing up so I'm not used to dogs but am
Looking forward to our new addition.
I live in a modest three bed semi and there will be someone at home all day at all times for the first six months . We also have a small back garden with a big shed and I will get a solid gate at the side to prevent escape and enjoy safety.

I would prefer a dog that does not shed , enjoys children with a gentle temperament that does not require huge specific training or long long walks every day.

Please respond as if you were talking to an absolute beginner. I appreciate all advice and support as i believe that a dog would be a wonderful and much loved addition to our family, thank you.

I wouldn't recommend a 'rescue dog' for a first time owner. Ideally I'd get one from someone I know, ideally an older dog with a genuine reason for rehoming, e.g. elderly owner downsizing or moving to sheltered accommodation.

I hate trite little statements like this.

Rescues are fantastic for some people but a really bad idea for others. "Adopt don't shop" or "rescue is best" shouldn't be trotted out as the answer for anyone who decides they want a dog.

Me too. See my pp.

I totally agree! Retired greyhounds available for adoption are usually aged 2-5 years, so over the bouncy puppy phase but with plenty of good years of life left. They are calm and chilled in the house and the vast majority walk perfectly on a loose lead. Although they haven't usually been in a home environment before, they are typically clean in their kennels and will transfer those habits quite readily to the home (ours didn't require any active toilet training at all when we brought him home). They don't smell or slobber and don't require professional grooming (apart from nail clipping). They can shed a little at the change of the seasons but a totally manageable amount - I definitely don't notice it all over the house. Plus most importantly, they are super quirky, funny, cute and loveable!

@Strawberrypicnic I've read that greyhounds also love a cuddle and to lollop all over you.. is that true?

Well did you/ they report back to the rescue organisation that you had problems? they need feedback...please don't tar all rescue organisations with the same brush!

I'm simply putting options out there! there are some lovely dogs languishing in rescue centres.

If they're languishing in rescues, it's not because there aren't enough people wanting to adopt. They are probably unsuitable to the majority of homes, or are maybe undesirable to many due to age or health concerns. The OP has children, which may disqualify them from many dogs, and they're not obligated to take on an elderly or infirm dog.

You're talking complete 💩

I have rescued many greyhounds and now have a very greyhound-y lurcher. Greyhounds are laid back and absolutely beautiful but many suffer from separation anxiety and you need to make sure you have a very secure fence. Recall is patchy. Some of my greyhounds would have been totally stressed out by the rough and tumble of family life.
If I had a young family I would get a whippet. Great with kids. Doesn't shed much and lots of fun.

Then why is it so hard to adopt a dog?

I don't agree.

We found it impossible to find a proper, well-assessed rescue when we first looked for one 20+ years ago: several rescues wouldn't even talk to us as we had young DC, once didn't seem interested and one hadn't assessed the dog they wanted us to consider. We ended up with a puppy.

I've a friend who fosters for a breed rescue and very, very few of the dogs she has are straightforward. A large percentage either resource guard, or have ongoing health issues. If you have young DC, you do NOT want a resource guarding dog snapping at the DC, and you probably won't have the headspace to handle an ongoing health problem that needs daily medication and regular vet visits.

Of course, your puppy MIGHT have an issue. But MIGHT is not the same as DOES.

The rare issue-free dogs are usually found homes very quickly - the friend above fostered a dog last year who was youngish, healthy, walked nicely on the lead and recalled well. We both said, 'He won't be around long!' and he wasn't - straight into a home where he remains.

I'm simply putting options out there! there are some lovely dogs languishing in rescue centres.

The dogs that are "languishing in rescue centres" aren't the ones suitable for first time owners with young children.

I've volunteered in rescue and she really isn't. Dogs with no issues who would suit any home are definitely the minority and almost always find homes very quickly. The majority have some issue or other, or more than one. We're not going to rehome a dog with separation anxiety to a home where the adults work out of the home most of the day / week, or a resource guarder to a home with children, or a fear-aggressive dog to someone who can't commit to behavioural training and anti-social walking times.

The vast majority of people who contacted us wanted a young (but past adolescence), healthy, house-trained dog with no behavioural issues. Quite often they needed to be good with kids too. Only a minority came in open to considering an older dog, or with the experience and right home environment to take on a troubled dog.

The aim of every rescue is to match a dog with a forever home. Every time a dog 'boomerangs' back into rescue, its issues and insecurities become more entrenched and it becomes harder to rehome successfully. Some rescues do take it too far and have blanket rules that mean they miss out on homes with great potential - no children under X age, no renters etc. There are valid reasons why those situations increase the risk of things going wrong for the dog and maybe smaller rescues don't have the resources for much 'sifting', so I can understand why they do it even if I do think personally that considering each individual home on its merits is the better approach. Some rescues are economical with the truth in an attempt to get more dogs out of kennels and into homes (or they don't take the time/have the resources to be able to test the dogs reactions in different situations), which is well-meaning but misguided and often has the dual unwanted result of the dog being returned AND putting the person off ever trying rescue again.

Yes, I did. The response? I was told I was ‘exaggerating’ the dogs behaviour and could return it if I wanted to.

Lots of people have replied to your comments saying rescues are not reliable (which most people on the house agree with judging by previous threads) and yet you continue to ignore them. Your ‘good experiences’ don’t trump dozens of potentially and actually dangerous ones.

We tried to rescue for over two years. We had had a rescue dog and three rescue cats. All with issues and quirks. I have trained agility dogs for 14 years and have good behavioural qualifications and experience. Some of the reasons we were turned down:
We have a cat (main one)
We work (from home)
Garden too small (live on the edge of a rural town with miles and miles of walks)
You want to do too much with a dog (training, walking, all the things most dogs love if they are fun for them)
You won't do enough for the dog (as in walk it four times a day no matter what else the dog was doing)
Not enough breed experience (taught that breed for years)
Won't feed raw (because for most dogs it's not really necessary and a massive faff)
Won't pay a non refundable deposit before meeting dog

...and loads of other reasons. That is the rescues that actually answered my calls, emails and messages. Lots of 'don't apply yet' then 'dog is homed isn't that wonderful'.

So we bought a well bred, well raised puppy who is loving life and very happy with our living arrangements (but would love more snacks please!)

I will always be a big advocate of rescues but sometimes it's not an option.

@devilshands no need to descend into bullying

That may well be true..you have to do the research

No ones bullying anyone. We’re (all) simply telling you that you’re the minority as 99% of us have awful experiences of rescues. As a new dog owner, OP shouldn’t take the risk of ending up with a dog that has undisclosed issues - particularly not with children…

We don’t have children and we still couldn’t get a rescue dog. We tried four shelters and were rejected by all of them.

The reasoning? Our garden was too small and neither of us had owned dogs before. Oh, and we had a very dog-friendly cat. So we gave up and went to a breeder instead.

Rescue has its’ place but it’s not the perfect solution for most people, especially families with young children.

Well I just hope people took the opportunity to educate rather than belittle alot of posters on here when they got their first dogs, unless they came out of the womb as champion dogs owners 😂

Another one for lurchers / sight hounds here. I'll be crucified by the devote dog owners here who are clearly better people than me (🙈) but mine have a long walk in the morning and are left while me and my husband work all day. They sleep all day just like they do when I'm at home! They are often called 40mph couch potatos (although this depends on what you cross it with)

Most are short haired with minimal shedding unless collies etc are introduced which I would recommend avoiding as this is now not only an incredibly fast dog, but with alot of energy too.

Mine are fantastic with my kids and have been since they were babies but I have strict rules with my kids were essentially if the dog doesn't want to interact, they don't.

Only thing it might not match is low training needs (which is what I assume you initially meant by your comment around training) recall takes along time to perfect with these dogs due to prey drive and independent thinking. But with consistency and treats it is achievable. But in general these dogs have placid laid back natures so training such as socialisation, resource guarding etc requires little effort (again appreciate exceptions to the breed).

These dogs are laid back and independent so can easily be left alone however I would make a point of doing it from a young pup with the help of a dog walker / neighbour to build it up. It can be a shock for any dog to go from 24/7 company to time alone, even if it is just three hours. I'm not having a go here, just appreciate your new to the world of dogs and may not be something your aware of 😊

If you can't carry it 200 yards and don't have 5 grand to brown nose emergency veterinarian services don't put yourself through it. You're on Mumsnet so I imagine you've established diplomatic relations and/or a presence with any notable neighbors. New ones will need to be made as people have sensitivities to dogs they may not have already displayed to you as an individual or member of a nuclear family unit (however you may intra-neighbourhood-ly identify)

If you don't typically have energy for socialising, walk your prospective dog in the evenings to avoid people disassociating with you emotionally (adjust for local crime levels, of course). Be ready otherwise to stop when your prospective dog needs to pee/poo, make an observation or socialise with a curious dog or human.

Be ready to calmly handle your dog being attacked by another dog. If you are able to lift a dog exceeding 40kgs for over 200 yards you may be able to intervene physically. Otherwise, practice drawing your phone to call local authorities. It is unlikely a dog whistle will dismay a frantic dog, but try it anyways?

Beyond that, if yours is the final decision, it is likely you will have to delegate scheduling of vaccinations and dog feeding to a young one as part of their growing up process. Similar to a border collie dealing with newborns, your family may grow to resent the dog - be prepared to enforce loyalties to your dog. (Side note - don't get a border collie if you are planning for more kids).

Beyond that, make sure at least one member has a stable level of income and the dog is not left alone for more than 8 hours! If you are buying a puppy you will need to vaccinate twice at either weeks it is aged 6 and 8, 8 and 10, or 10 and 12. If you are adopting, I recommend someone stay at home with the dog/s for the first 3 weeks full time to ensure it is welcomed appropriately.

Wtf did I just read?

I wonder how the OP ever got mumsnet's permission to have a human child?

There are some crrrazzzy responses on here. OP, we have a maltipoo. Lovely temperament, doesnt need too much walking - 40 mins a day just fine, doesn't shed, very portable and great fun to be around. Best of luck with your lovely new furry friend!

Mf just hit me with the baby licence bro just admit you're a socialist and get your wife boinked by the parish leader