My untrainable dog...

[Doggoe]

I've given up looking for any advice but can anybody relate just so i know I'm not the only one doing through this!?
I'm not an experienced dog owner so i admit i was naive in my expectations, i had 1 previous dog who trained like a dream, she obviously had her minor faults but overall there were no major issues.
We are a family with 2 DC, previous dog slotted in well, she was sociable, gentle and kids loved her, we could take her to dog friendly events, UK holidays, beach etc. She sadly passed away and enter new dog, a Labrador puppy.
I know no 2 dogs are the same so i wasn't expecting new dog to take the others place but as i've said we are a family and do alot of days out and holidays to include the dog as we don't have a regular dogsitter so we naively assumed all would be well.
Dog is now 18 months old and we have so many issues, many things can be put down to anxiety i think (I'm no expert) but it means our lives have changed so much and i really am starting to resent the dog as we can no longer have days out etc because we cant take her and we cant leave her.
Dog was socialised from the get go and we have also done weeks of training to also try and get on top of these issues but its impossible and she truly is untrainable.
The issues are:

• Anxiety, she is scared of everything, unfamiliar people, dogs, loud noise, the wind, fireworks, going for a walk, the groomers, vets etc.
• Pulling on the lead, we have spent months trying to do loose lead walking after advice from trainer, had to resort to a halti harness, she still pulls on that. And not just a little pulling, she has nearly pulled my arm off multiple times.
• Separation anxiety, she isn't left alone often but she howls and chews her bed up. She has to be crated as we've tried without and she chews the house up.
• Biting, she still bites as much as she did when we got her, nothing we do stops her.
• Energy levels, she has endless energy and is very forceful. Will run full pelt at us and the kids, we all have constant bruises/scratches.
• Cannot keep her off the couch (i have no issue with dogs on the couch) but she does not sit calmly, she races on and off the couch constantly and seriously hurts you when you get stood on. I cannot have visitors other than family who understand because she does the same.
• Recall, she has so much energy she needs off lead walks but her recall is 0 at the moment, there have been odd times its been better but never consistent. Atm she cannot be offlead as she will just literally bolt.
• She's reactive to all dogs, barking and lunging and sometimes people.
• She whines alot, particularly when out for a walk but at home too.
• Night time, she does not settle until about 10-11pm, up and down the sofa, walking round in circles, in our face with obvious energy to burn, she has toys but wont play alone so constantly bringing them to you to throw and by 10pm i just want to relax!
• Jumping up, counter surfing.
• Terrorises the cat.

There are things i just can't remember at the moment but all these issues we have been working on training since having her and nothing has helped, most things have gotten worse! I clearly must be a terrible owner because i don't know any other dog with this many issues!?

To add she is walked daily, as mentioned off-lead is not possible right now, she has many toys/bones to keep her busy, she's only left a few hours 1 day a week as i work from home mostly. We play with her, kids do too so we try burn energy off that way. What else could i do?

Get a decent trainer. Put her on a lead in the house, she can’t be running around, sofa jumping etc if she’s under your control. Teach her to switch off. Give her some structure, let know what is and isn’t acceptable and be absolutely consistent with it.

The lead pulling could well be related to anxiety if she's a bit of an anxious pup.

You definitely need a good positive trainer to work with you with a plan you can all be very consistent with. She needs training with everyone on the same page.

What other exercise and stimulation does she get if she's being a bit of a nightmare on walks? Do you do any games with her? Labradors can do well with some sniffy games like hide and seek, channel some of that energy somewhere you want it to go.

One of my friends has a lovely Labrador, she's also an ex-vet and now a dog behaviour lecturer, she knows her stuff. She does loads of tracking games with her Labrador and they both love it.

I'd be interested to hear what training and socialisation you did....

Training isn't just going to a training class for six weeks and then ending it.

Socialisation isn't just letting her meet people randomly on walks and meeting other dogs as/when.

I'd also be interested to know how much exercise she actually gets. One man's hour walk is very different to another. In an hour I cover about 4 miles in a walk (up hills/on the beach etc). My sister covers 3 miles on flat concrete.

How old are your children?

It's hard to provide any decent advice without the above. A trainer might be a solution...but tbh a lot of your issues sound like poor socialisation and not enough stimulation combined with a household that isn't capable of managing an active breed (sorry!).

I agree with this an inside lead can be a life saver. but this all sounds so stressful she must be running on adrenalin.

Google some sniffy games and licky matts. speak to your vet about it.

No dog is untrainable. You just need to find what makes them tick.

What training have you actually done with her? Did you take her to formal classes?

I agree, get a decent trainer. I would even go as far as gun dog, obedience or rally training. (Whatever is available in your area!)
Your dog sounds bored, frustrated and anxious... some dogs just need continuous training as in having a job for their lifetime. Especially if your lab is from working lines.
So go out, join some other dog lovers and get going- K9 sports are fun and you'll meet lots of new people. Depending on DC ages, they are often encouraged to join in as well!

Does she have a ‘safe spot’ like a crate (keep the door open maybe) where she can retreat to and know she will not be bothered? Teach her to switch off & relax.

get a decent trainer & review her diet.

Do you let her run around on a longline or take her to a secure field as onlead walks aren’t going to help .

Show or working lines?

Either way I'd look into training that will play to her instincts - retrieving and using her nose to find things. It's quite possible that boredom is part of the problem.

You need either a brilliant trainer or a behaviourist trainer

Is she crate trained

My dog is coming up to 2y 3m. It was LAST NOVEMBER when things started to come together.

We have been to some form of training, obedience, hoopers, agility, fly ball, man trailing every week since his vaccs were done. And i practice/train every day, every walk.

Some are really hard work i guess.

A lot of these characteristics remind me of our Dobermann, she sounds a very dominant dog.

The number 1 best thing we installed was a sit and stay.
So practice it at home. Ideally a corner spot for a start so they can’t really move.
Start with say 1 min, keep working up, you want to get to 30 mins sit and stay.
Once they can do this, then sit and stay in the garden, then the park etc.

It teaches them they have to do what you say, and are under your command. It also teaches them to self settle, and to be calm in all situations.

Theres tonnes of other stuff too I’m sure. Oh the other thing, lead pulling. I stop dead everytime until they learn, again quickest way I’ve found to stop a dog pulling.

She has a 45 min lead walk, I just have to be dragged along because I can't not walk her. Twice a day on weekends but in the week I just simply can't fit in 2 walks when working and doing school pick ups and having the kids at home etc. Walking is twice as hard with the kids as she is obsessed with where they are walking, it's fine if they are behind her but obviously kids love to run ahead and she goes crazy pulling to be ahead of them so I have to wait until they are in bed to walk her.
My DP doesn't help out with walking her so it's all down to me and I just can't fit in 2 walks around the kids in the weekdays. Walks are so stressful I come home each time even more stressed with her behaviour.
We have puzzle games and she is extremely good at them so they only last a few mins at a time, she chews up the softer toys where you hide treats in them, literally ripped them apart to get to the treat.
She needs entertainment 24/7 and I can't give her that.

One 45 minute lead walk a day is nowhere near enough for a teenage Labrador.

If you can't manage to walk her more than once, can you pay for a dog walker? Or even daycare?

I also forgot to add
• She eats things off the ground on walks, even on a short lead when I'm scanning the pavement she can grab something and swallow before I've had chance to react!
• She licks me constantly, I tell her no constantly, push her off, she doesn't listen.

I can deal with some of these issues but I'm seriously in over my head.

I think you might be over exercising the dog so they basically are never tired out. You could consider "do nothing" training.

https://positivepartnersdogtraining.com/the-do-nothing-exercise/

This is the one I was actually looking fir

https://stacythetrainer.blogspot.com/2017/04/stop-walking-your-dog.html?m=1

Agree with this (which goes back to my original post about speed to).

45 minute walk - maybe 2.5-3 miles? Nothing. For a dog at 18 months and a lab.

Honestly, I think it's cruel.

If you cannot devote the time to her, re-home her. This isn't going to improve unless you commit to looking after her properly - and I'm sorry I sound harsh but a 45 minute walk once a day for a lab that age is cruel.

@lifebeginsaftercoffee If I could afford a regular dog walker I would, we do have a very large garden that she can run around in.
I have looked into daycare and we've done trials but she's so reactive to dogs putting her in that situation gives her more anxiety.

If my DP pulled his weight more we could do 2 walks a day but he won't make it a priority.

45 minutes ONCE A DAY is not too much exercise for a lab. Jesus. If anything it's cruel in how little it is.

Edit to include links to all the places who say they need way more than 45 minutes a day:

https://www.pdsa.org.uk/pet-help-and-advice/looking-after-your-pet/puppies-dogs/large-dogs/labrador-retriever
https://www.petplan.co.uk/pet-information/dog/breed/labrador/
https://www.akc.org/dog-breeds/labrador-retriever/
https://www.thekennelclub.org.uk/search/breeds-a-to-z/breeds/gundog/retriever-labrador/

Get a decent harness (ruffwear webmaster is expensive but less likely to come off than the stupid Julius ones) and a long line (heim ones on zooplus are good) so she can have a bit of freedom and you can work on recall at manageable distances. Sufficient exercise won't magically fix her but it'll set her up for success.

So another demanding comment from me- the children must learn not to run in front. It’s a safety issue.

Honestly, it’s hard training dogs and children at the same time, but essential. Kids and dogs wind each other up. They both need to learn to behave! That’s not a criticism, just a statement about dogs and kids.

Work out when she’s at her best. Is she good when it’s just you at home?

Work out her triggers. What calms her, what excites her.

Thing is, training is one thing. Knowing your dog, observing what makes her tick, is the key. It’s no good giving her a toy filled with treats to distract her and fob her off so you can do something else. She actually needs constant attention and to be taught how to be- how to relax, how to sit etc.

She sounds very anxious and in need of a ‘job’. I’d ask your vet for recommendations for a trainer who uses force free techniques.
Instead of a directionless run round the garden set up some sniffy activities out there for her (finding rags that have been scented with cloves etc). Wear her brain out, not her legs and if she’s anxious she will do better in the garden than outside. Outside is just TOO MUCH GODDAMN FUN OMG WHAT SHALL I DO WHO SHALL I RUN OVER TO WHERE ARE MY BOUNDARIES!!!!!!!!!! so keep it small and specific out there for her. You have to be the most interesting thing - squeaky voice, favourite toy, really smelly tasty treats that only come out when you’re doing heel work etc.

Honestly, with the list of issues you've listed in your OP, I think you need to speak a proper, qualified behaviourist. Your insurance should cover the cost if it's recommended by a vet.

She's hugely anxious and massively high energy - two things which don't go together very well, unfortunately. I would highly recommend getting her seen by a vet - maybe getting her on some kind of medication - and then seeing if you can get some behavioural training.

I know our socialisation wasn't good enough but I honestly did try my best, I took her out as soon as we got her (carried) she came with me on the school runs and up and down the road to get used to noise etc. She also socialised with one of her litter mates regularly before she could go out on walks as their owner is a friend of mine. Once she could go out we regularly met other dogs and people on walks and we did 4 sessions of training which were all 6 weeks each. We were due to continue after Xmas but I feel like I'm throwing money down the drain as she doesn't improve even when we follow the advice the trainer gives.
As I've said she gets a 45 min lead walk at the min as that is all I can do, when she has been more reliable with recall then she can have that time off lead but at the moment she won't come back. If she wears a retractable lead she runs full force until it stops over and over and I'm seriously worried she will dislocate my arm.
My kids are 5.
I fully accept she hasn't been the right choice for us. Her sibling, my friends dog is so much more chilled and loves other dogs and we did more socialisation than she did.