Regret getting puppy - 6 days in

[sukiwh]

Hello everyone, I’m really just looking for some reassurance here. First puppy in many years, had dogs before but do not remember it being this hard. The cats are furious, I feel so guilty that I have ruined their peaceful little lives, and if I could go back in time, I would not get the puppy. I can see she is objectively cute and understand she is 8 weeks and 6 days old, so can’t expect much from her in the way of understanding. I just wish I could go back in time and not get her. I feel depressed.

Please tell me these feelings will lift. I feel resentful towards this tiny sweet thing. Lots of support from DH and DC, I have no idea why I feel so negatively. I can’t see a future where this decision turns out to be a good one.

Actually I'm quite interested what does a furious cat look like . I've never had a cat , don't want one really , but how can you tell ?Do they swipe at puppy when walking past ?

I have safe spaces for my cat, the bedroom and dining room are puppy free spaces and currently in the evening puppy is wearing a harness and lightweight lead so he can be stopped from chasing the cat, I'm hoping training classes are going to help with this and him getting a bit older, he is tenacious as my previous dogs got a good slap and hiss and then left her alone but my puppy is viewing this as a invitation at the moment but the cat currently isn't that stressed and we are managing it.

@Libre2 🤣🤣

Do some people just go round looking for thread just to be arseholes??

I cried every day for the first 2 weeks of getting our puppy. He was threatened with going back many, many times. Now he’s 2 and the best thing that has ever happened to our family 🥰.

I felt exactly the same as you at first. Puppy blues are a horrible thing. I had wanted our own dog for years and had to convince my DH it would be a really good move for our family before he finally caved and then I spent the first few weeks crying my eyes out and thinking I'd ruined all our lives (bit dramatic maybe!) He's now 7 months and it's got easier every week, and I absolutely love him to bits and spending time walking him every day has actually improved my mental health. I got lots of advice from people (online as I felt to ashamed to say it out loud in real life) saying it would get better but I really didn't believe it when I was in the thick of it but it really genuinely did.

Oh god been there puppy blues was bad , I very nearly gave ours back ! But yes a great dog now but I would never have a puppy again there harder than babies !! Advice would be get loads of help and space from the dog to keep you sane , and lots of training and walks will help you bond, then in a few months it should get better xx

We have both cats and dogs, the cats first and then the dogs, although we have recently lost our elderly dog, it’s heartbreaking. The cats will soon get used to the puppy and as cats rule the house the puppy will soon realise his place in the pack. Our youngest dog ( a rescue) was terrified of our cats when we first got him, he now plays with one of the cats and sleeps in the same bed as him. Make sure that your cats have high places that they can go when they need time away from the puppy. Your puppy will soon settle down and you’ll be made up with him.

Give it back to the breeder

Hang in there! The first 2 months I really regretted getting a puppy. He's nearly 4 now and the laziest, easiest dog going. He's so loving and we all adore him, he is literally our baby!

Puppies are hard work. They are demanding like babies. If your cats are older, they will not want to interact with a hyper puppy. But your puppy will probably want to play as that's what they like.
Are you going to puppy training classes or puppy socialising group? It will good for your puppy, you could also ask for advice from the trainers.
But with kids it will seem like more hard work than before. Unfortunately you maybe didn't put much thought into getting a dog, as I wouldn't have gone for a puppy with children. I would maybe have gone for a dog a bit older. My son has always wanted a dog, but with us working and I know it would be me walking the dog, I have said no, as it wouldn't be fair on the dog be left alone for hours on an end.

I brought a golden retriever puppy to share our house with a middle aged cat. The puppy just wanted to play, so the cat smacked her face a few times and from then on they ignored each other until the cat, now very old and ill, was due to be put down. When my husband went into the kitchen that morning, the cat and dog were curled up on the dog's bed....broke my ❤️

Give it to me....

It’s completely normal to feel like that, I grew up with dogs and loved them to bits.

My husband and I got researched everything and got a puppy, and I hated every single moment of it, I was more or less depressed and it was horrific. We ended up returning him to the breeder, it was heartbreaking but at the time the right decision and only later I realised it was the puppy blues.

18 months ago we got a puppy, and it was hard but the best decision we ever made. My son with ASD chose her but then hated her for 3 months so we were considering giving her to my parents but suddenly something clicked and they’re best friends. She’s truly the best thing ever, don’t beat yourself up and just allow yourself time to adjust x

Give it time. I was ready to find a new home for our puppy for the first six months. He is a year old now, and has become a well behaved and fully integrated member of our family. Our cats like/tolerate him, snuggle nearby when he sleeps. He lets us know if they are sitting by the door to be let in or our. They try to intimidate him now and then, but he only chases them once in a while, and I think they start things so he will chase them.

This was me last year, I was surprised with an 8 week old puppy for my 50th birthday! My ex partner and kids bought her for me thinking I would love her instantly. Bear in mind I had been menopausal for a few months, the amount of times I practically sobbed while cleaning up after her and god knows how many deranged texts I sent to the ex giving him verbal abuse regarding said puppy 😳
Fast forward 7 months and I'd be more than happy if the kids moved out and left me with the dog 😂i couldn't be without her!
I also have 2 cats who hated her on sight but now tolerate her, with the odd swipe now and again. So hang on in there, it will get better

Im just horrified reading how many on this thread not only adopted a puppy but from a breeder!!!! constantly we are informed that shelters are full of unwanted dogs that were adopted as cute puppies then thrown out when the cuteness wasnt so apparent. Lock down provided the shelters with more unwanted dogs and cats than ever before yet so many of you admitting to having a puppy and the worst of all, from a breeder!!! dont you read about how these poor dogs are bred till they are half dead? responsible dog ownership is adopting unwanted dogs, honestly! and as for regretting getting a puppy from a breeder, why on earth did you get a puppy if you werent a hundred percent sure? these are living creatures not fashion items!

I feel your pain. We got our new puppy nearly 2 years ago, a year after we lost our lost furry boy. He nearly broke me, I had forgotten how hard puppies were & he was well behaved. Apart from zoomies, which my other boys never did and talking. Hubby is 100% animal person, I was WFH, so no break from puppy etc, I jokingly said it may come to you choosing me or the pup. Never in doubt he would have picked pup. I even read the contract we had from breeder, re returning him, again if that had happened, bye, bye hubby.... now he's great, (it was more me than him, just less patience as we get older). Hang in there, it will be worth it.... Good luck

@solonge as a dog owner you must know as much research as you put in, nothing quite meets the reality of dog/puppy ownership. Also, whilst rehoming a rescue is absolutely a wonderful thing to do, it isn't necessarily easy or appropriate for everyone. We got our 15month rescue and she has come with a whole host of behavioural issues. Many of which didn't show up in the rescue centre but only once she'd decompressed at home. She made life very very hard for a while (still does sometimes at 5 years old) and we are experienced dog people. Many first time owners, they wouldn't have coped, whereas with a well bred puppy (they do exist, not all breeders run puppy farms) they can be more of a clean slate that grows around the family they live with. Not to mention some of the insane criteria rescues put on their requirement lists!

What is relevant is that dog breeders are not required, ever. No dog breeder will breed one lot of puppies from a dog, they have several. They are a business and a money making machine. Its wrong. Its exploiting animals.

All animals come with their own set of problems. Taking a puppy is at least a years worth of chewed up shoes, rugs and chair legs. Shelters know their dogs and will help the first time dog owner find a suitable dog. Its this requirement for cutesy pups and kittens that is so sad when there are thousands of dogs stuck in shelters for their whole lives.

Looking after a puppy is the single hardest thing I’ve ever done. I felt like I was constantly tied to her and had completely lost my freedom. Nearly 10 years on and I’m sat next to my beautiful old girl and can’t imagine life without her. It really does get better. Your puppy just wants to please you but doesn’t know how yet. We have to teach our pups what’s expected of them.

One thing I read that really stuck with me was “Your dog is only a part of your world, but you are your dog’s entire world” It’s worth every little bit of hard work that you’re putting in now. Come out of this the other end and you’ve got yourself a best friend for many, many years ahead.

@Maraudingmarauders I totally agree with you , I would describe myself as a fairly experienced dog owner . I know how to cross off breeders that don't sound right , know lots about training pups . People (there are lots) who take on rescues know what they are getting into it's a big deal taking on a rescue , we are not the type of family that are best for rescues . While I have every confidence in my ability and knowledge of training puppies , I don't feel I have the balls to do the same with a rescue . Kudos to people who can take on rescues they are good at what they do , I salute them .

@Solonge I disagree many people breed dogs because they are wanting another one to show , or another working dog . Breeders are not all breeding purely to sell . But many of the pups will be sold and some kept by the breeder to show .

Yes, I felt the same when I had my puppy. She is 1 now and a total love, but it took a long time to get over the initial feelings which were regret, guilt and irritation and frustration.

So if a 'breeder' is 'breeding' to show a dog, thats ok? so that isnt exploitation? Ive seen a fair number of bitches held whilst a dog mounts her, and heard the yelps. They dont choose to churn out puppies for someones hobby. Yes, its still exploitation. If they want a working dog, why not rescue one? why have your bitch produce six puppies? there are enough dogs in the world already. Too many in shelters. They are not fashion items or born so they can be brushed and shown off like a painting. They are sentient beings and deserve some respect.

Actually I'm quite interested what does a furious cat look like

Oh, they let you know! For animals with relatively immobile faces, they have the most amazing range of expressions. Mine will sit in front of you and stare at you. One will meow in an annoyed way. When I was growing up, our cat would follow you wherever you were in the house, then sit in front of you with their back to you, checking every now and then to see if you noticed.