Husband wants a dog, need help choosing

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So husband wants a dog as he thinks this will help him get fit. He needs to get fit so I'm certainly agreeable. I like dogs, but would have preferred to wait a bit due to my work, but DH works from home so can do the walks and be available and do most of the training.

We've been researching, but are a bit stuck on breed, so thought wise mners might be able to advise!

We need it to be able to be home alone sometimes, good with kids and resident cats (2, one is elderly).

Kids are pre-teen/ early teen, both very bouncy and can be loud.

We thought of a lab, but i think they're a bit too big, I'd prefer a medium size

Labradoodle, but apparently they're also quite big.

Beagle, difficult to train and bark a lot.

DH will mainly be training it, but he has adhd so a difficult to train dog will just see everyone miserable including the dog.

DH wants a dog that can manage a 10 mile walk, but not need a walk that long every day. I don't want loads of extra work, so low-ish maintenance is ideal, but most of the recommended ones are too small for what DH wants.

I'm wondering if we're looking for an impossible dog?!

We aren't looking for a rescue as kids and cats seem to rule us out.

Any ideas greatly appreciated

sorry missed your update on why you are researching - very wise
He could volunteer at a local rescue to walk dogs and see how he gets on and be good exposure to different types of breeds etc

Its not for me to judge you DH or his intentions - I guess you know what he is like and if getting a dog is a good idea.

I am just amazed at all the posters suggesting Springers. They do no usually fall into the easy calm dog category. Very sweeping statements but some spaniels can be really really hard work.

Most dogs need regular exercise and it is better for them to have the same amount of exercise than suddenly the weekend comes and they get a long walk that they are not fit for.

Dogs can be great for structure and getting people out and about.

Do map in time for training and getting advice from trainers to help you. Maybe get on before you get the dog and they can chat to you 121 and make you aware of the impact of living with a dog and recommend one for your lifestyle. Much easier to see in RL.

Do you have enough room in your house for your elderly cat to live separately ?

Oh and because I realised I hadn’t actually put it in my posts, calm but able to do 10 miles isn’t at all unrealistic.

Anything that’s not a hugely exaggerated shape or size is capable of doing 10 mile walks if they’re fit, some are less willing to, but you don’t need a particularly active breed to keep up with a person, dogs and people have different active scales, lol.

Some people prefer active breeds, but unless you’ve a particular job for them or you’re planning on doing long distance running with them or something - they don’t ‘need’ them.

Please consider a rescue, there are so many unwanted (lockdown) dogs needing homes at the moment. The rescue we got DDog from insist on an initial 1 month foster to make sure dog and family are well suited and then provide life long back up if you proceed to adoption.
Or maybe foster for a while to see if having a dog in the family looks like it can be sustained longer term.

If he won't pretend to have a dog for a couple of weeks, then a puppy is a bad idea. I WFH and have two dogs of my own (plus 3 cats including one very elderly grumpy one). My dogs are older adult lurchers and incredibly undemanding, so thats fine, no problem at all managing them and work. I also sometimes have a foster puppy. With my last one, that meant starting the day at 6.30am when I ran full pelt down the stairs to let her out in the garden and then stand there waiting for her to wee and poo. Come in, do the animal feed, stand in garden again. Throw toys while trying to drink my tea, open back door again halfway through my toast. Try and get dressed while she bounced around in her pen, start work. Do a meeting while throwing toys. Get up during the meeting to let puppy out to wee. Realise puppy has done a poo and decide whether I can clear it up or chance her running through it. And so on. All day long.

If he won't pretend to have a dog for a couple of weeks, then a puppy is a bad idea.

Really?

I wouldnt pretend to have a dog and go for walks on my own. Whats the point or pleasure in that?

However I am extremely happy to be out for hours with my dogs. Walking with dogs is waaaaaaaay different to just going for a walk on your own.

I am really happy to get up at silly o'clock to go to competitions with my dogs - I would not get up for a pretend dog ever

Op
Honestly having a dog is like having a toddler that doesn't grow up

Not welcome everywhere
Smell
Make a Lot of mess
Need help with Toileting
Some need babysitters

If your toddlers years were hard. Think very seriously

Retrievers are ridiculously easy to train if you know what you're doing. They have a keen to please temperament usually. I wouldn't say the same about Labradors as they're already pleased and that's good enough for them!

In my experience lurchers are the easiest to train, best natured dogs I have had, and within reason adaptable to your lifestyle, happy to walk all day OR have a quieter day mostly spent at home with only shorter walks. Collie/greyhound cross maybe?

I used to have spaniels - working cockers and springers - and found them much harder work to train, and more of a mither generally.

Every dog is an individual tho - there are no guarantees what temperament your dog will have whatever it's breed, so you have to be ready for that really. Dogs are a great addition to the family tho. Good luck!

I also wouldn’t pretend I had a dog but then I’ve always hated doing role playing of any description . How about signing up for the cinnamon trust and seeing if there are any dogs to walk nearby - exercise and volunteering it’s a win win .

Greyhound/ lurcher might be a good shout.

As others have said, you shouldn't get a dog expecting it to get you fit. If that doesn't work out, and your partner goes back to his old ways, you'll end up with a frustrated and underexercised dog.

Don't buy a dog that needs to walk/ run 10 miles a day if that's not something you already do.

Greyhounds and lurchers are great because they will run like mad in short bursts and then are happy to sleep/ chill at home for the rest of the day.

If he wouldn’t step up for your kids, he won’t step up for a dog.
honestly don’t do it

@Reindeersnooker I would love to introduce you to my working retriever 😂 she is the driviest dog and her prey drive is insane! She's not untrainable but she isn't easy atall.

Dogs are pack animals and always find being alone torturous, you can't really get around that.

My older son keeps begging for a dog. I keep saying no, they are so much work and the above quote confirms what I keep thinking. I just see all the practicalities, which I will end up organising. I love dogs though. Reading with interest.

10 miles? Have you discussed it with the dog? My dog doesn't like walking. She runs away and hides under the coffee table if I get the collar and lead out. Alternatively dh will get bored with ddog and you'll end up doing all the walks and care. Men can always find a way of avoiding doing something they don't want to do.

A show cocker spaniel - not as crazy/hyper as working dogs, beautiful nature, easy to train, medium sized, don't shed and super chilled out (once they're through the playful puppy stage!)

I've had show cockers my whole life and they're amazing!

We've always had working dogs, labradors and springers. Both fantastic with kids and ignored the cats after a well placed claw laden biff.

BUT we've friends with Springers know a few with cruciate ligament injuries. One friend his dog has done in two legs, very unpleasant and expensive.

The spaniels adored our children and all their little friends. As a result two families bought their first dog on the strength of this

Your OH won't be able to walk then ignore all day though

Working springer spaniels have way to much energy IME, they'd certainly be up to the 10 mile walk, but if you got them used to that then they'd probably expect it every day and be naughty if they didn't get it! Beautiful but not a breed i'd ever get. A show cocker though would be a better choice - they love to be with you though and can be a bit clingy/needy IME.

I'd go whippet, good size, good to go out for a good walk but also very chilled, ok to be left for a while as will happily snooze in the warm. I had a whippet cross and he was very easy and undemanding.

All the poodle crosses I know are a bit strange in one way or another and they're very popular so you have to be very careful about who you buy from as there are a lot of puppy farms.

Don’t know much about dogs but i did watch a program about first time dog owners and whippet came first in terms of easiest, laid back sort of dog

Have you owned dogs before? Spaniels are bloody brilliant dogs - I adore them BUT they need proper training and handling. They are a big prone to resource guarding if allowed to develop. I've got a springer and sprocker, both are working dogs and they need mental stimulation just as much as physical exercise.

Lots to think about.

He's not mentioned it today so I'm keeping quiet!

I didn't know that you could get show and working dogs. It doesn't seem that a working dog is for us.

He's not going to go running with it. He's too old and broken for that! The 10 mile walk is ambitious for him and would be more of a slow amble. I can't see that happening very often either. So a dog that needs that level of exercise daily we just couldn't manage.

I'll suggest looking at other rescues and see what he says when he next mentions it.

Whippets not great with cats from what I read.

I'd not heard of the cinnamon Trust, that's a good suggestion, thank you @Floralnomad

No, neither of us have owned dogs before. I was around dogs a lot as a child, but they were small terriers.

If I was retired I'd be much more willing! But I've got a while to go before then!!

If he isn’t that likely to go for walks for god’s sake don’t get a spaniel. I have one and I love him to bits but he also gets three walks a day and inspects the garden for neighbouring cats and squirrels at regular intervals. Mind you, it’d be very difficult to ignore a spaniel that wanted to go for a walk - mine sits by the door of the room I’m in and stares at me intently and nudges and eventually barks and jumps up and paws me, and my neighbour’s fetches his walking boots to him! But those are dogs with a set routine who know when it’s time to go out. I rather think a staffy too - less energetic than spaniels and not as big as a lab, and love children.