Ive had a golden retriever puppy 4 days....and changed my mind

[Eliza22]

Does this happen? I feel overwhelmed.

Story...

My son is 14 and has autism and OCD. He has no friends despite many many efforts. He is high functioning. We've had his name on a list for an autism assistance dog for years but he's now too old for the list. A year ago, we sourced a breeder and decided to get him the doggy companion ourselves. So far so good. Two litters went by....no bitch for us until now.

The pup is beautiful. Full of energy but very clever, as these Goldens are! But, my son is tearful and upset (and so am I) because we have a beloved cat who is 7. She has taken the dog very, very badly. Last night, my son came to me in tears saying "I miss Tallulah (the cat), I want the dog to go away if we are going to lose Tallulah".

I should add....I'm 53 and menopausally emotional at the best of times. Have I made a massive mistake? We've had the idea of a golden retriever companion for our son for so so long, what HAVE I done?! I feel like ringing the breeder and saying keep the cash....I've made a mistake.

Help!

[Shriek]

Gah! Stoopid ophone!

*that none (not the nine)

[Eliza22]

Updating.... our girl has been spayed today. Bless. Stair gates back in situ and she's snoozing (deeply) as I write. Glad it's done. Hoping she recovers well. Any tips?

[Hoppinggreen]

Hi Eliza
Bertie was neutered last week and unfortunately we weren't as strict with the cone of shame as we should have and he ended up with an abscess that burst in spectacular style on Monday night.
Cue very ££££££ trip to the emergency vet and more surgery.
He's on the mend now and the cone is very firmly on.
Hope Immie recovers well
Xx

[Eliza22]

Oh Lord! That's not good. I haven't attempted the cone yet as she's still spaced out but I'm thinking, maybe at bedtime it'd be a good idea. I've a feeling she'll whine all night but, hey ho!

I feel very sorry for her. She's looking at me like she's no idea, whatsoever, what happened. One minute arriving at the vet (she loves going) and then whoooa! 😊

[llamadramawoes]

Lovely update. So glad you've been so receptive to advice. She's gorgeous.

[3boys3dogshelp]

Ahh she's gorgeous Eliza! If you want her to wear the collar overnight, which is a good idea, you would probably be best to put it on now while you are still with her so that she can get used to it and you can check you have it adjusted properly before you go to bed. Dogs tend to tolerate them better left on all the time rather than on and off.

[LordRothermereBlackshirtCunt]

I always remember when my now sadly-departed cocker was spayed, the first thing she did when we got through the front door was charge into the lounge and jump over the back of an armchair. We were terrified she'd ruptured her stitches. I slept downstairs with her for a few nights until I was sure she wasn't going to worry the wound.

[Eliza22]

Morning 😊 She's eaten a bit of vet prescribed bland food this morning and now snoozing again. Wound's nice and dry. She's poked her snout down there a few times but one word from me and she stops. I'm lucky because there'll be someone with her all the time. Thanks for the advice about the lampshade.

She's been a bit confused about the reinstated stair gate and not being allowed up the stairs and lossocking on the bed.

[MissKittyBeaudelais]

My goodness....how time flies. Am updating for anyone who may be interested. The golden retriever puppy I was going to take back is now the MOST IMPORTANT PERSON in our household. I’m writing this with her sitting at my side. She’s on the sofa. The sofa she wasn’t allowed on! She follows me everywhere and is absolutely beautiful and so, so loved.

Of course, we had to have our entire garden landscaped two years ago because she’d dug it up/eaten the plants/was always in the muddy pond. Now we have paths and stones. She rearranges all the stones 😁 The cat and she never really got on, but the flip side to that is, the cat spends most of her time in my son’s bedroom and he adores her. Before the dog arrived, he barely looked at the cat.

I love having the dog and thank heavens I didn’t give her back to the breeder 😊❤️

[OrangeJuiceandArmchairs]

Awwwwwee

[Hoppinggreen]

So happy to hear it, I often wondered how you were getting on
Not sure if you remember me but I was going through similar and I’m happy to say that my boy is Fab too now x

[JesusInTheCabbageVan]

That's wonderful Only just seen this today, but it's been lovely reading about your journey (I recognised a lot of it from when I got my lurcher). How is your DS doing, has she helped with meeting people?

[BiteyShark]

What a lovely update.

[MissKittyBeaudelais]

😊😊😊 It’s lovely, isn’t it? She really is my constant companion and makes me smile, just seeing her. I do remember you @Hopping. Really happy for you. We keep thinking we should get another 😁

[IfOnlyOurEyesSawSouls]

Awwww thats fab❤️

[Nesssie]

Read this thread for the first time and what a rollercoaster of emotion!!
But its an excellent example of the 'puppy blues' that everyone gets, and how it really does get better!

Had a mini heart attack in the middle when you said you were going to breed her, but a lovely happy ending Beautiful girly too.

[Gotaprettypup]

I've just read through this thread for the first time...how heart warming...[sigh]

It has also given me hope...prettypup is 4 months...today we gave in and installed gates...tonight is the night we try to leave her on her own downstairs!! We too have cats and they are still giving us the 'when is that thing going?' looks..She isn't aggressive to them, just wants to play...they aren't convinced!

We got prettypup to be a companion for my disabled DH.. and give me shedloads of exercise

[MissKittyBeaudelais]

@JesusInTheCabbageVan...🤣🤣🤣 why that username?

Well, DS struggles hugely with OCD so, the dog is NOT allowed in his room. Then again, neither am I unless I’ve been through security and decontamination. His autism is a little easier as he’s now at college and has PAs who are close in age and are more like mates. He’s well, considering where he was when we got the dog and has come on massively in the past 2 years. What I can say is that the dog is a talking point. He usually wants to talk about what the dog has done/eaten/rolled in (😐 I never give a full report in this one) whereas he has absolutely no interest in me and what I’ve done as I am hideous boring 🙄. He lives her though and now, I will often find him just watching her and smiling or stroking her head/velveteen ears. Considering he wouldn’t touch most people with a barge pole that’s huge!

@Gotaprettypup....stick with it. You will look back on the difficult puppy times and wonder how you managed but you’ll hopefully have a lovely dog by your side and in future, they give so much fun and comfort. My girl is big (I mean real big - like a bloke-dog) and she has an amazing coat. I love it when she comes and sits next to me and I can gently wriggle my cold feet under her. She looks at me as if to say “go on then”. Or she’ll just kind of lie lengthways against DH or I on the bed and the weight of her and warm fuzziness of that coat is soooo comforting. No one cuddles like this canine 😊. Your cats will either get used to it and integrate or not (and continue to throw dirty looks at you forever).

@Nessie. I realised there’d be no puppies when the vet told me about the risks to the pups and the bitch. The thought of that was NOT something I could live with. And to be fair, she CAN be a bit spoilt. She’ll guard a discarded bit of kitchen roll like her life depends on it; she needs my full attention when off lead or else she makes her own fun, involving badger shit and and every other dog’s ball. She’ll collect them and then she bargains with me for their return. I’m held to ransom by a mutt in front of a small group of dog owners who are pretending its OK, they don’t really mind/want their ball back/care that much that their dog is sat whining at my goldie. That’s a nightmare.

Have just seen this thread has 12 pages. How lovely that my desperation and sadness at the start evolved over time into my overwhelming love for this animal.

[BiteyShark]

How lovely that my desperation and sadness at the start evolved over time into my overwhelming love for this animal.

They really do find their way into your heart

[Gotaprettypup]

misskitty prettypup will be a big dog...and already lays on our feet...when she calms down I'm looking forward to sofa snuggles.. and she is cute and cuddly. .
The cats have lived with a dog previously, we lost our old boy when they were youngsters..they cuddled up to him...I think it will be easier as she grows up...and realises they aren't there to play with!

[JesusInTheCabbageVan]

MissKitty I'm glad he's doing well. I bet the dog helped him in many other ways you're not even aware of. I think ours has been a very positive influence (as well as a total PITA at times), and DS just glows when she deigns to snuggle up to him.

The username came from a very old MN Classics thread, about a poster who received a text saying that her Ocado shop was being delivered by Jesus in the Cabbage Van. Wish I'd come up with it myself, but I'm not that original!

[MissKittyBeaudelais]

@Jesus 😀

[Tumbleweed101]

I’ve had my pup since Feb half term. He’s already far more part of the family and understands our routines.
He still has the odd accident in the house but I can trust him loose in the house now without watching him like a hawk. I do put him in his crate overnight, which he’s happy in and when I go out I leave him in a safe area of the kitchen. It does get better quite quickly. I’ve had dogs most of my life however so had expected and planned for the disruption, it’s harder if it’s your first dog or you’ve not had one for a while.