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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Can someone hold my hand please. My beloved dog is being pts tomorrow.

114 replies

Shitmyhairdressersays · 28/05/2015 20:25

And my heart is absolutely broken.
He has been in my life 14 years. He is 15 and a half now.
He's been arthritic for a long while and now has kidney problems too I think from the meds.
He is suffering and it's time.
But oh my heart is shattered.
He's my best friend and we have been through so much.
I don't know what I'm going to do when he's gone.
Just needed to tell someone who 'gets it'.

OP posts:
OttiliaVonBCup · 28/05/2015 21:23

One day you will hold my hand too....

Shitmyhairdressersays · 28/05/2015 21:24

Thanks Bright I'm so so sorry you went through this.
I have to believe I'll see him again X
Thank you Candy please give your dogs a big cuddle tonight.
Mine has been with me through so much shit in life and been loyal and constant throughout. It's the longest I've had someone other than my parents and brother in my life.

OP posts:
Str1p3yl3af · 28/05/2015 21:27

Oh how sad. I have an elderly arthritic 'gentleman' and I can't imagine the pain of making that decision.

He's been the best dog ever and completely irreplaceable. I was told by a friend that we should 'not cry when it's over, but smile that it happened'. I rather like that.

I'll be thinking of you in the morning.

spiderlight · 28/05/2015 21:28

I am so, so sorry. We lost our beloved Megan three days before Christmas and it absolutely devastated us. I still cry for her nearly every day, and DH and I still talk about her daily and point out puddles she'd have been wallowing in on every walk. She has sent us signs though - DH has heard her and she's appeared to me very, very vividly in dreams, so I know she's still with us. As others have said, the process itself is very very quick and gentle for them - they really do just drift off to sleep and you can feel them relax as the pain goes. It's a true gift that you are giving him, the value of which is reflected in your pain. He is clearly very dearly loved and I'm sure he's had a wonderful life with you. Never forget that.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow and holding you tight in my heart.

Justusemyname · 28/05/2015 21:31

I get it though in my case it was my cat I'd had for nearly 19 years. She got me through some awful times and really helped when I left my boyfriend and moved out.

Animals are buggers for getting into your heart.

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.

LuluJakey1 · 28/05/2015 21:34

It is so hard. But he won't be scared because he will have you with him like you have always been there for him. You wouldnot have made the decision unless you knew it was the right thing. Keep reminding yourself that he has had a lovely life with you and been loved and cared for and given you so much love back. It has been a privilege for you to have him and it is the price we pay for loving them so much that it hurts so much to lose them but you will see him again.

My granny had cats all her life and when she was dying she was in hospital and the day before she died I went in to see her and she said ' Well look at all this lot in here. They have all come to see me. Look at all their tails in the air'. She could see all the cats she ever had running round the ward. She pointed them all out by name. I like to think they came back to take her with them!

Will be thinking of you both tomorrow.

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 28/05/2015 21:36

I had to do this a couple of times, most recently with a beloved kitty. Totally "get it". Even though he was advanced FCRF and in bad state, you just hate making that decision.

It's only from reading others MNer's lovely thoughts that I've been able to focus on the lovely bits. I'll share/hone them for you:

You've given him a long lovely life.
You clearly love him to bits (and the children do too!).
You're doing the best for him. He can't make the choice to stop the pain: you can.

Finally, I believe he won't be scared and sad unless you are: just focus on the positive. Try not to be sad. Try to feel all lovely good things - love for the companionship he's given you, happiness for his rainbow-bridge of non-pain he'll soon be having. Let him feel how much he loves you. Keep it together for him.

Flowers for both of you.

yongnian · 28/05/2015 21:39

I absolutely have been there too and totally get it.....loves and hand-holding...XxX I chose to allow myself to privately grieve mine as the family member he was....and only shared how devastated I felt with those I knew who had been through the same...as people do minimise sadly, sometimes with the best of intentions.
'no more pain lovely boy' was my mantra Flowers.
It may not feel it right now...but you are absolutely doing the right, kindest, most responsible and selfless thing you can do for him.
XxX

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 28/05/2015 21:44

I'm so sorry for you. I know exactly what you're going through too. We lost our old boy nearly six months ago. Not a day goes by when I don't think of him at some point. He was such a massive part of our lives. We had him before the kids came along and he was like our first child!

What I found a huge help was posting on here. I had some lovely messages of support when he was ill and then when he died. I had people message me with such kind words. Keep posting on here if it helps, there's lots of lovely people on here.

Our boys ashes took just under two weeks to come back. They were in a beautiful pouch woven out of rushes with a ribbon round and a pretty label with his name on. We keep it in a cupboard beside our bed. He liked to get up there for a snooze away from all the noise.

Emily is spot on. It will be quiet and gentle and you'll get to say goodbye. It could be so much worse. It's lovely that you'll be at home.

We have a puppy now. I often compare them, most unfairly as they are different dogs, but I still miss my old boy so much. It's lovely having a dog in the house again though, it really is. Someone said to me that it's testament to how much you loved them that you need to replace that in your life. It certainly keeps me busy. And he is adorable!

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. Just remember that it really is the final act of love. It's the last thing you can do for him and you'll always be glad that you didn't let him suffer.

Flowers Flowers Flowers

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 28/05/2015 21:45

And, may I add (yongian sort of triggered it) but people who don't get it?!? Gaah!

I read recently that people "mourn" the loss of a mobile phone. And I get that too - you invest a lot into it, put photos, texts, etc, on, so it's not without value. But it is, still (at the end of the day) an inanimate object - a mobile phone has no feelings. Your dear pup does - how can you possibly be odd for having feelings right back about him?!?

DramaAlpaca · 28/05/2015 22:01

I understand. I've had to do this twice in the last year with our two elderly dogs, the second time just a few weeks ago.

It's a painless process & they slip away very gently & peacefully.

You are doing the right thing for your lovely old boy.

Flowers
Shitmyhairdressersays · 28/05/2015 22:07

Thank you so much to each of you.
Sat here reading your messages with my eyes streaming.
My heart is broken. X

OP posts:
SallyMcgally · 28/05/2015 22:15

Feel so sad for you. I'm so sorry. We were devastated when we lost our spaniel. The only thing to be said was that there was peace in knowing she wasn't suffering anymore. There's no suffering for the dog. Your dog will feel sleepy and safe because you're there, and then will just go to sleep. But you will hurt, so make sure someone looks after you. And one day, sooner than you might fear, you will enjoy happy memories of your lovely dog again. Thanks xxx

wannaBe · 28/05/2015 22:18

Been there, most recently when I had to have my cat pts last week. (Sad) sometimes the kindest thing we can do is to let our animals go with dignity.

There is an empty cat place in my house but I'm not sure if I can bring myself to get another cat.

(Flowers) for you op.

yongnian · 28/05/2015 22:21

Ps a native American friend of mine told me a phrase from her culture which I love and is particularly beautiful for our dogs...she said when a loved one dies, they say that they have simply 'walked on ahead'.
That's how I think of mine..up ahead somewhere, waiting for me round the next bend, only just out of sight X

saturnvista · 28/05/2015 22:24

I'm so sorry. This is a huge loss and you'll need to give yourself a lot of time. Every dog lover has been there but that doesn't make it easier. I will think of him tomorrow. Flowers

AlfAlf · 28/05/2015 22:45

I'm so so sorry Sad
It sounds like he's had a wonderful life with you.
Be sure to take a picture of him now if you haven't already, it will be comforting one day.
I just found an old certificate today about trees being planted in the name of my childhood dog, Bonnie. She die 22 years ago, but we still talk about her, she was such a big part of the family. She was like mum's 5th child really. She was hilariously mischievous, she used to rob the local butchers and steal fresh baked bread from neighbour's windowsills Smile

MrsJackAubrey · 28/05/2015 23:03

another one in tears here - it is so upsetting, truely heartbreaking, to say goodbye to your dog. But honestly, this is the best thing for him and for you. There is no alternative. The best thing is to just try and be calm for him, as he'll know if you're upset and be perplexed. Save your tears for afterwards if you can.

Like you, my lovely Cavalier was my dog, everyone in the family got to say goodbye but I went with her alone to the vets. The last thing I could do for her was to cuddle her on the floor on my lap, and to have her hearing my familiar voice telling her 'good dog', Rosie's a good dog' stroking her head. After a minute or so I said, has she gone? and the vet said she had passed away as soon as she started the second injection - the vet said my dog's heart was simply ready to stop and all it needed was a nudge in that direction.

Her ashes did take about 2 weeks, and for me, they came in a lovely box with her name in gold writing and a card from the crematorium saying 'with deepest sympathy'. It took me about a month to bury her ashes in the garden and plant a new rose there. It will flower for her for the first time this summer.

You have loved your dog for 14 years and he's loved you. That can't ever be taken from you. I also believe that dogs go to heaven - how can they not?

with sympathy,

MyPreciousRing · 28/05/2015 23:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

patienceisvirtuous · 28/05/2015 23:24

Another one who will be thinking of you tomorrow OP.

It really is the last act of kindness and love we do for them.

How lucky your lovely friend is to have been loved, happy and looked after for all these years, and to get a peaceful, dignified, and pain free passing.

Our pets are such lovely pure souls. I am sure they get a golden pass straight to heaven.

OP you should be proud of your massive achievement - giving your loving pet the best life you could.

I wish him a peaceful passing tomorrow. And you strength for him.

Hugs xxx

Slippersandacuppa · 28/05/2015 23:36
Sad

Another one (crying) who'll be thinking of you tomorrow. I haven't had to make the decision but lost two dogs under awful circumstances last year and still cry regularly over them.

I do believe that you are giving him a gift and that he won't go very far. What a lucky boy to have had you. And what a lucky you to have had him.

X

Auriga · 29/05/2015 00:00

I'll hold your hand. Will be thinking of you tomorrow.

Lilybensmum1 · 29/05/2015 00:12

Holding your hand and thinking of you tomorrow. Not the same but I remember having our family cat put to sleep. Sad

Leeloo01 · 29/05/2015 01:02

I will also be thinking of you tomorrow.

I was exactly the same as you with my darling dog. I could not conceive of her not being with me. I was completely distraught like you. But I managed to get through it (like all of us here on this thread) and now have such happy memories of her which make me smile.

You will be okay. Your dog will feel your love and will feel safe. It will be peaceful and you know it's the best thing for her. My vet said it was a shame that people don't have the option for such an peaceful end as their pets do - she said she is so glad that pets have that option.

It's a great act of love you do for your dog to help her passing in such a peaceful way. Just talk to him, maybe have him on your lap. You can always close your eyes and just whisper in his ear so he knows you're there.

My dog still "visits" so to speak sometimes - I hear sounds she used to make. I also think they don't ever leave us really - not when the bond is so great. It would be nice if you put a photo of him on here - he sounds lovely.

You will get through it love x Our beloved animals don't live as long as us and absolutely nothing can change that fact - celebrate the wonderful life you gave him making him part of your family. A lucky dog indeed x

DrankSangriaInThePark · 29/05/2015 06:05

Morning OP.

I am already up as am in Italy.

Sending you more love and strength for later, and hope it helps a little to see how much you and your lovely dog have touched all of us too.

He will be with the person he loves most when the end comes you. Flowers

Some of these stories are so lovely/bittersweet. I hold on to the idea always that this end isn't the end. I won't let it be.

Hope you both managed to get some sleep. xx

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