Dog really hates toddler DS

[TheHolyGruel]

I have posted about this before. I have two dogs (staffs) and a toddler DS who is 20mo.

My older dog (male) really dislikes my DS. He growls at him constantly and it is just getting worse. We had problems with this dog being dog aggressive but this has been overcome somewhat by walking him on a muzzle and walking the dogs separately. The dog has been checked by a vet, other than a recent worm problem (now sorted) there is nothing wrong.

We sought advice from a dog trainer/rescue person who we had a couple of sessions with. His advice re the toddler/dog situation was to put the dog down, as if something did go wrong then not only would it be a dreadful situation for us, but dreadful for staffies everywhere (another story for the papers etc, another crack in the BSL nonsense defence - I fully believe that BSL is bollocks and that the problem is not because he's a staff, but I'll talk about that in a moment). But I don't feel I can do it. In the meantime, any attempts to unite dog and DS are failing. DS is instructed to offer dog treats, to sit nicely and pet nicely, not to run up to dog, not to touch anything belonging to dog, etc. I make an effort for the dogs to be in the same room as DS as often as possible, but I am becoming worried for DS safety, as dog is really sounding at the end of his rope.

I honestly believe it is because the dog has been usurped from his position of 'first born'. The other dog displays no such issues, and is very fond of DS. The problem dog has always been the established top dog.

DH works away from home sometimes and has his biggest stint of the year coming up next month. He is away for a month, and I am petrified of how I will cope with this situation alone. It is so stressful.

In the first instance, does anyone know of a way in which I could find a foster carer for my dog, initially for this upcoming period, or is this unrealistic? He is fine with dogs smaller than himself and with older children (all children aside from DS it seems, in fact).

Can anyone offer any other advice or solutions? I think ultimately he will need rehoming, but I also know it's not that simple...

Stop with the whole growling is fab thing. It's a sign that action needs to be taken. And when that involves a small child, it means immediately. Dogs get free and children are impulsive.

Its irresponsible to wait 5 MONTHS to ask for help when there is a small child involved.

Stop putting the bloody dog before your child's safety; rehome the dog and make sure it's to a place without children.

Dog has to go - simple. We have a dog and I would be heartbroken to have reached this stage. But there is no alternative, you have a dog you can't trust around young children. I would ring all local charities but unfortunately you may find they are bursting at the seams anyway/they suggest euthanasia.

I dont agree with ops lack of action but dont want to attack the op as she is looking for help now ( although sooner would have been better) and thats what the post needs to focus on.

I do get the growling thing though. If the dog is displaying its displeasure/discomfort by growling, what is the next step as itss growling has been ignored (in that ds is still there) for 2 years. How long will the dog keep gowling and not snap?

OP does your door have a lock on? At some point your ds will learn to open doors (sods law says itll be when you're not looking). If your dog did go for or even snap at ds, what would your non agressive dog do. My neighbours had 2 similar tempered dogs and introduced a pup. The older dog did snap at the pup and the other backed it up seriously harming the pup (it was pts:( ). Is that normal dog behaviour? Dont know but could be something to consider.

Hope you get your roof fixed and are able to sort this soon. Its sunny here!

I know dogs.
You guys are just being obnoxious becuase you're defending and untenable situation. And now the OP is highly stressed on her own. Not a good mix.

Who said growling was fab?

My happy healthy rescue dog does dislike toddlers intensely. Luckily I don't have young children and haven't whilst owning him. We found this out when my sis was looking after him and he snapped at her toddler granchild. The child had slapped him on his back (he's small lurcher) and he'd snapped at her face! Luckily he didn't contact. Another time my cousin was visiting with her dcs, including 2 toddlers. We tried our best to keep the dog outside but he got in, was distressed as house was full of dcs and he'd been, unusually, kept in the yard. He wasn't too pleased to see toddlers. We put him back out and tried our best to get them to go asap as tactfully as we could. I felt sorry for my dog as he's so soft and lovely usually but also know that any dog is a risk. And wouldn't want to have an injured toddler on my conscience.

He is perfectly healthy and everyone who meets him says what a lovely happy dog but he can't be trusted with toddlers and I will endeavour to keep him well away from them. I got him at 16 months old so no idea what his history is but he is a much more confident dog now. Was dog aggressive now over friendly. I had the time to spend training him though.

I hope you find a new home asap OP. It's heartbreaking how many staffies are in re-homing centres though

But what environment is really childfree? Don't these families have grandchildren, nieces/nephews, friend's children who visit?

Where the dog will live, don't neighbour's have children? Where the dog is walked, won't there be toddlers around?

It just takes one slip up, one unsuspecting toddler tripping over the dog or getting too close and it could lead to serious damage. The dog has shown to be aggressive around young children. The trainer who has seen him, has recommended that the dog be pts. At some point one needs to get a grip and do the right thing, painful as it is.

Tulips,

Well done, OP has posted that she has PND and you are calling her irresponsible . Do you not have an ounce of compassion in your body? How horrible you are to do that.

Why are the frothers not RTFT?

OP IS REHOMING THE DOG
YOU CANNOT REHOME A DOG OVERNIGHT

YOU CANNOT FIND A VET WILLING TO KILL A PERFECTLY HEALTHY DOG OVERNIGHT (THANK GOD)
IF OP CANNOT AFFORD TO PAY A BEHAVIOURIST, IT IS UNLIKELY SHE COULD PAY FOR EUTHANASIA

and

RSPCA DO NOT TAKE DOGS FROM THE PUBLIC
OP DOES NOT WANT THE DOG KILLED
DOG IS NO MORE DANGEROUS THAN ANY OTHER DOG
DOG MAY NOT LIKE OPs CHILD BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN DOG IS A DANGER TO ALL CHILDREN

and

A GROWL IS A WARNING SIGNAL
OP HAS TAKEN THE WARNING SERIOUSLY
OP IS TAKING ACTION

and finally

THOSE POSTERS THAT ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT ARE HELPING THE OP

FROTHERS - You are NOT helping. All you are doing is making a depressed mother feel worse. Count yourselves lucky you are not in the same boat. I hope to God if ever you are, if ever you are suffering from PND that people show more compassion that you have.

Tantrums you gave a whole speech about how growling is a good thing and shouldn't be stopped and that the dog hadn't been agressive.

Midori said that growling is the dog communicating and that it does not mean that it's agressive.

This is all semantics. A dog is not agressive until it is. This dog is growling consistently at a small child in the same building. The odds are raised somewhat.

I don't feel hysterical in the slightest. It's not going to come into contact with my child.

LtEve, your post has froth all over it.

The dog does not have a have a history of being aggressive to children.

Read the op.

It is not aggressive to other people.

If you think growling at the ops DS means the dog is aggressive to everyone and a danger to every child it comes across and needs to be PTS because of this you clearly know nothing about dogs.

What would you prefer then, a dog that gave no warning that it was unhappy?
Growling is communicating.

At the end of the day, the op is rehoming the dog.
She made that decision. Keep telling her she iresponsible and should rehome the dog right this second is clearly not helpful AS SHE IS ALREADY DOING IT.

And let's talk about iresponsible shall we?
It is very iresponsible for a mother to go out of their way to make another mother with PND feel worse, to make them feel like a bad mother. To make her feel that she is not keeping her child safe when you KNOW she is in the process of trying to rehome.

Would you rather she let the dog into the street and let someone run over it?

You should be ashamed.

I have not read the full thread so apologies if it has moved into other directions, but here it goes:

I would only consider rehoming if the dog was safe. He is not, rehoming is passing the problem to some unsuspecting well intentioned people who may have a toddler themselves, or a neighbour with kids, or some young children in the family.

I am totally shocked to see so many people asking you to modify what you and your children do (even if you are not doing anything wrong) to suit the needs of a dog that is not even safe around other dogs.

The brave solution is to put him down sorry. But I'm probably biased, my neughbours' rottwailer killed their 2 year old. The dog was only an overexcited 6 month old pup who in the spur of the playing (no growling involved) took the toddler by the neck and fave him a good shake all in front of the surprised parents. Unfortunately the dog was too strong. Obviously, there was no second chance.

well, if I ever need advice I know who Id listen to, and it aint the frothers who stroked a dog once and think they know their behaviour

the dog has not attacked anyone or tried to

the dog is not a danger to anyone and everyone it sees

Pedigree the dog will be safe in the right environment. Rescues have a lot more experience in dealing with dogs like OPs who by comparison to some they have seen will be a piece of cake to rehabilitate/retrain.

So sorry about your neighbours, Id like to think that Id be quick enough to stop a 6 month old puppy from taking a 2 year old by the neck right before my eyes, we all have to be vigilant when our children are playing with dogs of any age and size.

The trainer who has seen the dog, thinks the dog should be pts. The odds that this dog could go on to inflict damage on OP's or another child are unacceptably high.

I think OP needs emotional support to accept that pts is the sensible and responsible action. Not to be lulled into false security or made to feel guilty about giving up the dog.

A growl is a warning sign an animal is about to strike. Maybe the warning will work (the threat passes away) and no further action is required. It is a clear sign of aggression.

To be frank its chilling how much people want this dog pts. If you need to satisfy some urge Im sure you could go out and snare a stray and brick it or something

No ffaming from me really BFG, its your problem you have bought into the media hype about SBTs, no-one elses

I think Pedigree has summed it up. No second chance.
You can label everyone a frother, whatever good that will do. But it will take the dc to burst into the kitchen ONCE to have disaster. It is going to be nigh impossible to rehome this dog if the OP is open about growling and snarling at the baby, so the whole 'she is going to rehome' thing is disingenous because it's not going to happen tomorrow.

Ok, you have to actually know what you are talking about before you comment.
If all you know about staffys are the reputation they have in the press and from people like you, then you cannot comment.

The reason so many staffy owners say what good family pets they are I'd because we have been responsible dog owners and trained and socialised our dogs.
The owners who buy into this bred for fighting bullshit are the ones that are disappointed when they buy a staffy and it isn't aggressive, they don't train it or socialise it, the dog becomes unpredictable, they breed it, sell the puppies and dump the dog.

It then takes a while to train and socialise a rescue staffy. It's hard work. I've done it 3 times.

My dogs have never even shown their teeth to me, my DH, my DCs or anyone else. They are trained.

So please shut up about staffys being aggressive and bred for fighting when neither is true.