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Original poster

The Surrogates

93 replies

katedan · 14/03/2021 17:33

Hi anyone else watching this.? I am on the 3rd episode having binge watched this afternoon, really interesting stories.

OP posts:

Nith · 15/03/2021 00:07

I saw a bit of the last one. Must admit, I got a bit pissed off with the woman moaning about not being able to be there at the birth due to Covid, the way she carried on it was almost as if she thought it was all a plot against her personally.

Original poster

katedan · 15/03/2021 09:54

I am surprised I thought it would be more popular in MN world, I def recommend watching.

OP posts:

FourteenthDoctor · 15/03/2021 10:02

Cheers op will watch

TeaTimeReader · 15/03/2021 10:04

What channel is this? Can’t see it when I google

PrimulaAuricula · 15/03/2021 10:07

Seems to be bbc3. Sounds interesting

Original poster

katedan · 15/03/2021 14:58

Yes BBC3, not shown until later in the week but is available on iplayer now.

OP posts:

Rosehassometoes · 15/03/2021 17:10

Felt so sorry for the home birth Mum, left looking so vulnerable post birth whilst they cooed over the baby.

Original poster

katedan · 15/03/2021 22:14

That was so strange when the father got in the birthing pool with the surrogate, surely she would have preferred her husband to support her during the birth. Felt really sorry for the lady who carried her baby for her boss, she looked gutted at the end 😥

OP posts:

LittleCatDog · 16/03/2021 15:21

@Rosehassometoes

Felt so sorry for the home birth Mum, left looking so vulnerable post birth whilst they cooed over the baby.

This bit made me cry, I didn’t like it at all :(

purplejungle · 17/03/2021 00:59

Amazed this hasn't been jumped on by those on mn given the controversy surrogacy usually causes.

IHateCoronavirus · 17/03/2021 02:57

The thing I picked up on was the back stories of some of the surrogates, feelings of being abandoned by family/friends. It appeared as if being a surrogate gave them a feeling of belonging, to which they were temporarily in control of.

The lady who had recently given birth and was so desperate not to lose the next couple. She was so consumed by the fear of them going to another surrogate. I wonder how much emotional support is given to these ladies and if they were given amazing support to begin with would the need/desire to be a surrogate still be there.

I thought the husband of the lady who had the baby for the single man was bloody lovely though. He loved, admired, and supported his wife brilliantly.

FritataPatate · 17/03/2021 08:38

I thought the husband of the lady who had the baby for the single man was bloody lovely though. He loved, admired, and supported his wife brilliantly.

He was a complete star! I also loved baby Hannah's Dad who couldn't stop weeping!

The only thing that worried me slightly was the apparent economic disparity between the IPs and surrogates. I know they can't be paid and that's probably right? But the contrast in almost every case , (but especially Mia's mum) made me uncomfortable.

Original poster

katedan · 17/03/2021 12:03

I agree about the lady who had just given birth for one family and was now desperate to go again just 3 months later, she clearly had MH and abandonment issues. Although you cannot legally paid in the UK do you think some are paid under the guise of "expenses"? The single Male dad seemed so desperate when he said it was the IP who were vulnerable not the women.

OP posts:

TomBarbara · 17/03/2021 21:42

I watched the first episode and now watching the second. I didn't realise it was illegal in Europe. Tricky as you want people to get the chance to be parents who are desperate, but then you worry about how it will affect the surrogate women as we aren't designed to give birth then hand over the baby.

Thesearmsofmine · 17/03/2021 23:25

I am just watching the first episode now. I am very torn on my feelings around surrogacy.

I think that the girl in this episode had around £7000 of expenses before she was 16 weeks pregnant and was going to ask for more. There is no way a pregnancy costs £7k! I guess the parents don’t have much choice but to agree because there is always the risk of the surrogate deciding to pull out,

DowntheTown · 17/03/2021 23:54

Just watched episode 1. The single parent who was surrogate for the two guys worried me. She said she was really struggling, near suicidal... then decided to be a surrogate. Red flag. She also said she didn’t realise it was such a big deal till she was about to give birth. She wanted contact with the child... but that’s completely based on good will isn’t it? Nothing legal. That worried me too. How would she fare if they decided to block contact?

TurquoiseLemur · 18/03/2021 00:10

Feel a mixture of things about this.

Especially the social events where potential surrogates meet people who would like to find a surrogate. On the face of it, a perfectly logical way of putting people in contact with each other. But it felt like mostly men meeting women and viewing them overwhelmingly in terms of wombs. Of course they were all there out of choice but it did feel a bit ugh.

Chouxbuncity · 18/03/2021 20:07

I struggle to understand why a single mum would go through the risk of surrogacy if not to be heavily financially rewarded. I always feel so conflicted on these cases. You shouldn’t be able to buy a womb but then maybe it’s worse not to be generously paid for such a huge contribution- especially when as a previous poster said there is clearly a huge wealth disparity between the surrogate and the families in some cases.

glitterbombe · 19/03/2021 10:34

I've just watched this. The lady who had baby K and then wanted a baby with kitty and James made me very uncomfortable.

TomBarbara · 19/03/2021 14:13

I felt uncomfortable with the manager woman deciding her employee should have a sweep. It seemed like she decided without consulting the employee

ShesMadeATwatOfMePam · 19/03/2021 14:15

Surrogacy is gross. Taking a newborn baby away from the only mother it knows to fulfill someone else's want for a child is fucking awful. No wonder it's illegal in most countries.

Countrylane · 19/03/2021 14:24

Haven't watched it, but currently a few weeks from giving birth and SO OVER being pregnant. Would only consider being a surrogate for my sister or v v v best friends, and then only if it was absolutely only option. Cannot understand mindset of women who would do it for random strangers. I'd be interested in learning more about their backgrounds/mental health. I find it alarming (unless a lot of money involved, in which case hmm).

NutellaEllaElla · 19/03/2021 15:30

I wasn't aware of this programme. I will seek it out.

bekindtome · 19/03/2021 16:32

@glitterbombe

I've just watched this. The lady who had baby K and then wanted a baby with kitty and James made me very uncomfortable.

I have to agree with you. She was trying to find another couple to have a baby for 2 weeks after giving birth.

TomBarbara · 19/03/2021 17:11

When it's a gay couple or single man adopting the baby, do they use a separate egg donor rather than the surrogate mum's egg?

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