The Split

[LARLARLAND]

Anybody else watching it? I really want to like it but I am really not feeling it.

Make that Mamma Mia!

I can't like any of the characters in this and the daft faux mirror sub plots shoved in to "make us think" are just annoying.
I love NW and SM but this is not the right vehicle for either of them.
And, why would handsome Chris prefer NW to his now pregnant ex?
And, why does he keep lingering in doorways instead of getting on with his own job?
Are the three sisters all so different looking because they actually have different fathers?
How did Chris know where Nina lived when he'd had to ask Hannah for her number? Why didn't she tell him to FO instead of pretending she had someone there?
The mother is a terrible actress.
The father character is just odd.
The whole thing is quite annoying.

My sister knows the person upon whose life it is based.

I didn’t know it was based on a true story.

I agree that Dutch guy needs to get back to work!

Are the three sisters all so different looking because they actually have different fathers?

Good point. And the age gap between Nicola W and the other two actresses is about as much as the gap between her and Anthony Head!

i'm enjoying it - mostly for the glamour and for the utter delusion that a woman could be that age, have 3 DC, a fantastic wardrobe, amazing haircut, great make-up, perfect manicure (and pedicure etc presumably) be totally loaded, have a nice husband AND a hot guy at work who thinks she was the one that got away, and also is on top of her game at work.

I do know a few very successful women but nobody can sustain all of those balls, even if some of them are very close to being super-women.

It's female fantasy stuff, no? These programmes always make me feel desperately unsuccessful!

in reality, where would she even find the time to get her nails/eyebrows/general deforesting/haircuts done? Looking that good takes ages, more and more time over a certain age. She's hardly fitting that in, during her 80 hour week!

And still has time to stair out at the skyline, moodily cogitating late at night!.

Why does he keep lingering in doorways instead of getting on with his own job?

I noticed that too. About time Christie did some actual work!

Conference/ I agree with you. I have the time but not the cash to look good ! It’s a bit like the morning programmes that show fashion items at 50 to 100 quid a top or bag when their demographic watching these shows couldn’t afford such luxuries.
There are a few women around who can do this ‘have it all’ but many don’t and it breeds resentment and unhappiness.

The handbags on the show were something else - I've never even held a handbag so expensive and yet apparently they're everywhere :)

These tv shows love peddling these illusions - my experience is you either have time, then no money for the mani/pedi/facial/fancy dye and haircuts etc, or you you perhaps have some of the money and no time, especially if you've got DC, and this woman is supposed to have 3!

Did you notice how little they appeared to sleep too? Lots of looking at her phone in the small hours after a 12 hour day, family party with wine and she still wasn't ready for bed!

Bet if you looked at a cross section of top female lawyers with children, none of them has that level of grooming.

I recently had to do a days work in a barrister chambers and I can tell you, all the women looked exactly like every other woman I know. The boss did have a Mulberry handbag (I don't normally notice handbags, but did clock that one, I didn't notice anything about the ones in the programme) but the rest were no different to us, no more made up or coiffed than I am (i.e. not much at all) and not looking more expensive or anything. And there was certainly no hanging about in doorways or pensive staring into space, it was all just focused work. But very analytical!

i used to work in consulting, i wouldn't say there was a high level of grooming there either - hours too long to permit a lot of that! The top women did have some fancy stuff but not on a day in day out basis.

Maybe the odd expensive shoes or a nice bag, but yeah, no sense that they had a personal upkeep routine worthy of the footballer's girlfriend!

I once worked with a marketing director who had a Mulberry handbag and a pair of Loobs but that's about it.

My friend works in insurance in the city as a PA and always has to look nice and well turned out for work - she is one for her hair and nails and so on anyway, but has the weekends and no children and works normal hours- still expected though.
however, she once had to work in their
New york branch once and she imagined they would all be well turned out with expensive bags and manicures at their desks, but no apparently!

People really think they all look fab!?

Hannah has horrible trousers on that had a baggy low riding crotch, shiny normal make up and a mumbob!!

Nina looks ok but Hannah - er, nope.

It's a bit more glam than Nicola W usually looks on telly though, usually she plays sensible detectives!

I think Hannah looks tired. Nina looks polished. The youngest looks like a hippy.

Hannah is clearly supposed to look as though she is polished though.

I've watched the first two episodes and I'll probably watch again tonight. But...I want to like it more than actually like it. I can't believe in any of these people as, you know, actual hard-working lawyers. The middle sister in particular is absolutely ludicrous (although is part of the story that she has been carried by her much more talented older sister?). All this weeping in the office, making eyes at colleagues, silly sibling rivalry, flouncing out of meetings to 'confer' - nah. I do like it when there's actually a client story line - so I want to know what happens in the Meera Syal/sportswear mogul divorce and I liked the pre-nup with the WAG.

And are we meant to think that Meera Syal is actually a functioning alcoholic, as per the divorce petition? Would anyone actually say, as the basis for a divorce petition, that a spouse's attitude to sex was as if it were 'the last job of the day'?

oh i don't like those wide legged cut off trousers - they are on trend though aren't they? I don't know who they make look better though, they were particularly unflattering on the rear view I thought.

I thought hannah looked nice - aren't we at an age where the wrinkles look like tiredness? I loved her hair - a much more interesting but natural looking colour than she usually sports.

And actually I do know someone who is totally designer handbag, fantastic clothes, top-of-her-field, works long hours, travels for weeks at a time for work, on the board of various glamorous charities and has two kids. I'll tell you how:
Style includes shaved head so very little daily maintenance, manis-pedis done monthly.
Shopping all done online from Net-a-Porter or in airports.
Children at boarding school.
House run by housekeeper, who also helps with children when home from boarding school. PA books holidays and socialising. Cleaner, gardener, natch.
Doesn't need a huge amount of sleep.

There you go, easy, innit? Just make sure you get to the top of your (high-paying) field and are very strict about delegating!

And are we meant to think that Meera Syal is actually a functioning alcoholic, as per the divorce petition?

Don't think so. I think she drinks a few glasses a night and considers that normal (as do many people I think). She was drinking his wine due to the value and to 'show him' what a drinker actually looks like - wasn't he getting someone in to value it? I got the impression she was just opening it all and drinking a bit of each bottle (what fun!).

Based on their given ages when dad left, the sisters are meant to be 42, 38 and 32.
I read an interview where the youngest was described as a "band aid baby" to help cement her parents' failing marriage.
Didn't work!

The youngest sister's wet fiancé seems to be based on Eddie Redmayne playing Stephen Hawking!

oh gawd its awful innit

church scene

nerf guns

cringe

i'm giving up

It's so cliched. Of course he sent things, or course she hid them, of course she still has them, of course they are upset and never for once considered that might have happened (despite being family lawyers and having 'seen it all before').

Yawn.

I get all that, yes it's horribly cliched, but even so, I'm really enjoying it.