Welcome one and all the another thread of increasingly excited perving appreciation of the BBC Musketeers - coming to your screens on Saturday 28th at 9:30pm
Handy hints for bemused lurkers:
- As ever, pull up a bar stool and Mother Superior will pour you a drink.
- The whisky on the bar is for VIPs, so if you drink it, then refill the tumblers.
- If you sit on the chaise and get stuck, we suggest peeling yourself off and burning the cover before re-upholstering in pauldron blue.
- Do not go down into the dungeon. Really. Don't. Unless you want to.
- The hay in the hayloft is changed whenever the inhabitants can be bothered - do not use the pitchfork up there unless you are sure no-one's still asleep/unconcious/hungover/or otherwise occupied in there.
- No not take exploding Athos into the hayloft if you intend to trigger an explosion. Or do, but make sure you rebuild afterwards.
- There is a trough and well outside for anyone needing a wash - there is also a mythical hot tub somewhere.
- The Wall is regularly and enthusiastically tested for structural soundness for those who are that way inclined.
- The Tavern gets cleaned sporadically.
- Flouncing is laughed at.
- Swearing is expected.
- Perving is required.
- No doilies are allowed.
- Pearls may be cast before swine, but not clutched.
- Perspective should be retained.
The Plot does not exist, therefore should not be discussed except in emergencies.
All for one; one for all; and free-for-all.
(unless you are on the Aramis Rota in which case you are more civilised than the Athos scrum which uses pointy elbows and any other weapon to hand.)