Celebrity Masterchef

[squoosh]

The new series of Celebrity Masterchef starts on the 18th June.

It features Chesney Hawkes AND Keith Chegwin! Can your ovaries handle the tsunami of sexiness that will surely ooze from your TV screen? And don’t forget the gorgeous Gregg Wallace, no one else quite carries off that half man/ half shoulder of pork look like the lovely Gregg.

There will be some other Z listers too (probably last spotted playing a baddie on an episode of Bergerac circa 1986) hoping to reignite their careers by wrestling with samphire quenelles.

(There may even be some Marcus Wareing)

I was reading the DS forums and posters are saying that Rylan has had cooking lessons. That's why when they have to cook their own food it's a dish he's practiced and plate up so nicely cos that's what he's been told. Reminded me that in the mass cooking challenge John had to step in coz Rylan just marinated everything in the slices rather than frying the onions which is really basic.

I'm transfixed by Kimberly's two tone blusher.

Anyone bothering tonight, didn't Natalie and Scott dance together on SCD

I love the way cheggars is always happy :)

Evening! Why is that woman so orange?

Oh I bloody hate Cheggars!
And I used to fancy Scott when he was in Eastenders but what on earth has he done to his hair?!

I've definitely seen him look much better bluebananas

Probably covered in fake tan Halsall, but I love her on scd, think she is the best female dancer on it.

I'm dreading Cheggers' 'breaded cream'....

Oh gods, yes. Gregg & his choclit. If he eats it while reading Bridget Jones is it chick lit choclit?

I have dipped in and out of this like a toast soldier and it occurs to me that people who seem to lack very basic cooking skills suddenly seem to produce adventurous, if not well cooked dishes. Chicken Polpiette anyone?

I am suspecting that they have some external input on their menu planning!

I was just thinking the same thing Ziggyzoom, someone is definitely getting help.

This is so far removed from the early series of Celeb MC when contestants were incredibly skilled cooks who had clearly wanted to show off a bit and learn more about cooking and it was fantastic to watch. Remember Matt Dawson, the cricketer? I recall Torode telling him that he was so good he was at professional chef level and should seriously think about pursuing it as a career (and didn't he go on to open a restaurant, maybe?). Fast forward a few years and we're scraping the bottom of the barrel for "celebs" 80% of whom have not the faintest interest in food but have obviously been pushed onto the show by their agents to revive a flagging career and get heaped with praise if they manage to cook pasta correctly.

There is nothing master or chef about it. Celeb Basic Cooking Skills If You're Lucky more like...

Cheggers' whinging on about dreadful veggie food is pissing me off.

Geez, Samira doesn't half gab

Fellow Mastercheffians do you agree that this series has been a damp squib? Not one of them is equal in skill to the lovely Sophie Thompson.

And not so much as a hint of Marcus Wareing. 'Tis a disgrace I say!

I think so, Squoosh . It's like Sleb MC's poor relation.

Definitely. I can't believe how poor they all are. Rylan's scared of fish, Kimberly has never done a souffle. The slebs are never as good as the regular people but this lot are an embarrassment.

I have a new-found love of Rylan. I don't understand it. Must be the weather or summat. Go Team Teeth!

I'm not sure Sam's done much wrong so far.

I've really gone off Rylan!

Why was he suddenly allowed extra time to plate up?!

Praise The Lord squoosh I thought I was living in a parallel universe where everybody worships rylan

Dandelion and Burdock ice cream sounds fantastic.

Kimberley's food looks the prettiest.