X FACTOR! 13/9- Tonight we are in the ARENA!! (spoilers, and all that, just in case...)

[Raahh]

Sadly, it's not the type of ARENA with lions and men in skimpy loin cloths.

Instead, we have contestants we have already forgotten, singing again (probably with a loud backing track and auto tune).

The acts will be singing:-

BRADLEY DENHOLM
Let Me Entertain You- Robbie Williams

BABALOLA EHIDIAMEN
It Will Rain – Bruno Mars

JAMES GRAHAM
I Can’t Make You Love Me – Bonnie Raitt/Adele

JALE ANTOR
Crazy Stupid Love – Cheryl ft. Tinie Tempah

THE COURTESANS
Delilah – Tom Jones

REBECCA JONES
Moon River – Andy Williams

CHARLIE BROWN
All I Do – Stevie Wonder

STEVIE TENNENT
Feeling Good – Michael Buble

PAUL AKISTER
Let’s Get It On – Marvin Gaye

LAUREN PLATT
How Will I know – Whitney Houston

INDIANA Ifill
I’m Going Down – Mary J Blige

LOU BOU
Pretty Hurts/Partition –Beyoncé

KIERON WINTER
Let her Go – Passenger

AMY CONNOLLEY
Greatest Love of All – Whitney Houston

We have Mickey Bubbles!

And some one daft enough to sing a Chezza song (which was bad enough to start with).

And not one but TWO Whitney songs!- We are being spoilt this week.

Bring and and and ear plugs.

Flabby Robbie.

Flobbie.

Fat Robster

Big Boned Robbie now looks a bit like Big Boned Peter Andre.

I think they're trying to make us lose the will to live.

It's thinner than Robbie, probably.

Fleagle, not fleshless, though if that would get me through to judges houses I could be!

We know where this is going...

'not ready' = 'too fat'

He is looking a bit like he's about to start talking about how much he loves his (as yet unborn) children.

Flobbie

What's with the new asymmetric look? He looks like a dazzle ship.

So I'm not ready for crop tops then?

Aww, he has no friends.

He has rented relatives, who can't even remember what he sang.

Wash your mouth out, Boff. Only doing one side saved the life and hides of three Pleathers. Bless their souls.

be honest Louis it was cos he was too fat

Flobbie is under the impression that going on xfactor (repeatedly) is an alteristic act.

poo squat!

Poo squats!

I wonder how much weight he will lose before live shows.

When Flobbie says 'let's get it on' he's referring to the Breville Toastie machine.

This is the act that's been rocking the old folks home circuit since Louis rejected him last year.

Omg finally definitive proof I've been saying for ages that cowell's turning into Michael Winner and now he's started repeating "calm down"

Stick to the pubs and clubs love

Way to steal attention you massive twats

Fleagle and Beagle like Flobbie

Ewwww.

Sit down Chezza.

It always has to be about her, doesn't it.