One Born Every Minute. Tissues and Judgy Pants at the ready!

[beejayel]

Am a teensy bit excited. And NOT pregnant this series, so can watch without that sense of impending doom.

The army guy said that he was about to go away until January and his Dd would be 4 months old when he came back..making it September

They were next door to each other weren't they?

Our capacity to deal with anger is like other parts of our personality. It matures as we do. He is young. Many young men do things like that, even ones that dont wear sports wear.

I do not think getting upset when you fear your baby is in danger, you have missed the birth of your first child and you are scared, is an automatically an indicator of a seriously flawed personality.
Nor that he would be a danger to his partner and child.

He may be a bit of a nob. TBH the majority of people are at that age. However we want to remember our teenage years.

pip you may get panicky around people like that but not all of us do. His family seemed ok and even though the edit tried to make the MW look worried she seemed fine as well.

It may have been attention seeking behaviour, again, show me a teenager that doesnt indulge in a bit of that. It may have been genuine, how do we know?

He looked stressed more than angry IMO

It's really unlikely the two couples were in on the same day, more likely the programme put them together in one episode because these two births had the common factor of a 20 yr old dad.

but the sister kept bursting into the other room by mistake? Maybe that's what confused me

He was 20 not 15

And he was shouting there was
Something wrong with him and storming
Off for a fag rather than ask details or ask to see his baby.

How old do people have to be before 'he is young' is no longer a valid excuse for piss poor tantruming behaviour? Both dads were the same age.

who knows how they will react in such a stressful situation, if he was acting like that if his dinner wasn't on the table then yes I would judge him, but not when he was worried about his baby and missing its birth.

The sister kept bursting in on the one room by mistake, but the room she was meant to be in we never went inside, presumably it contained someone else who didn't want to be filmed.

I still don't think his behaviour was justified. Just because it's a common reaction for young men - if it was a younger boy, under 13 or so, or a young woman, nobody would be saying "Oh he's young and stressed", it would be seen as a worrying sign of a serious anger problem.

Yes it was a stressful situation, but if you're getting that out of control in stressful situations then you need to seek help for it. Instead it's just normalised, FGS, she even apologised to him because he got that stressed, and none of it was her fault. His family were just telling him to calm down like he was stressing a little bit. He might not do it because dinner isn't on time, but is it acceptable if he does it because he's stressed out because the baby won't sleep, when he's a toddler and has just drawn on the walls of their rented house, when they run out of money, if one of them gets made redundant, if she doesn't feel like sex for several months? What about if the relationship breaks down? Would it be acceptable for him to punch walls then?

Frilly I, well DS2, had one of those clips and it was attached to a remote that was strapped to the top of my leg so I could move around. It looked the girl had one as well, also noticed the midwife whip it off and throw it as the baby was coming out

So you reckon is he going punch walls if his toddler (who has just been born) draws on the walls of his rented house?

FFS lets not get hysterical.

Do you really think it is a coincidence that they chose a soldier v a 'chav' of the same ages and kept cutting between the two? Maxium impact, maxium contrast.

Its is an entertainment programme, its not educational.

They want people to react in just the way you have.

The thing is though, whilst childbirth is stressful, it pales in comparison to the stress of being a parent.

We don't know what he'll be like in the future, but if he reacted that way to the birth, then good luck to him dealing with parenthood.

I didn't realise that with the clips. I assumed they went to a machine so had to still.

It seems we often only see inductions, water births and mothers with epidurals on OBEM but surely they need hours and hours of footage to make anything remotely interesting. If it showed a quick birth we wouldn't get to know the people would we and would likely be very dull.

The stress of childbirth is intense.
Do you really think being a parent is more stressful?
I dont think it is. Not unless something awful is happening. Day to day parenting isnt stressful. Not in the way that thinking your newborn baby is sick is.

We would all drop down dead of heart attacks if it was.

Whilst other posters have said he was expressing his fears etc, it is still very intimidating when patients/relatives behave like that.

No, he didn't abuse or assault anyone, but it's a fine line between someone punching the walls, f'ing and blinding and then turning on the staff.

Believe me, I've been there several times.

So have I.
But he DIDNT do any of those things.

No, but he punch walls, shouted and generally was aggressive.

I wonder if he feels, deep down, that by acting like that people will really think he is upset/scared etc. It's almost like he didn't have the skills to be able to express his angst in a 'normal' way. Sad really.

I agree with the 'sad' bit Midnight
It is sad when people cannot express their emotions in a mature way.
But it doesnt always come naturally and isnt always encouraged.

Personally I wouldnt call his behaviour agressive because none of it was directed at anyone else. He didnt threaten anyone and was generally quite polite.

He took himself away from the situation. He went outside to calm down.
There was some showing off, I wont deny that, but I have seen far worse behavioiur on OBEM.

He could be a total knob for all I know. I just wouldnt make that judgement based on last night's show. Again, I have seen far, far worse from older men and women on OBEM.

Oh, I know what you mean, there have been some right shockers on there. Especially the guy you mentioned up-thread who was 'playfully' locking his DW in the loo when she wanted her G&A - now he was a knob.

Oh FFS, I didn't say he was definitely going to do that, was just listing some examples of situations which could be stressful.

It IS sad. He needs help. What I find despicable is the way everyone's defending it like it's okay. If someone came on MN and said her DH had punched the wall she'd be advised to leave, and with good reason.

Oh god I remember the balloon/locking in loo one. He was definitely a knob.

You would adivise a woman to leave her partner if he punched a wall whilst she was being whisked away to theatre and he didnt know if his son was going to live?

Really?

Jeez you are well harsh.

Not defending his behaviour but its not automatically indicitive of a deep seated issue. Not in those circumstances. The things people are concerned about are things that he didnt do. Just stuff that he might be capable of.

As I said, he may well be a massive knob but we dont know that from the programme and there were lots of things he did that were very nice. He seemed affectionate, more so than most of the partners and he really wanted a future for his boy.

Could be all bollocks of course but only time will tell. If he does turn up on Jezza Vile I will be the first to hold my hands up and admit I am wrong.

I just watched it - I think they must have been in on the same day as it's too much of a co-incidence that the monitor said 20/9/2011 on the army couple AND Leeds played Man Utd 20/9/11.

I think he must have gotten faulty info on the programme about the state of play!

Yay I am not losing my marbles :)

i love this show - thought it was amazing that they actually showed full frontal vaginal birth - i dont think they did in the last series?
ive has 3 kids and having been at the head end i was so intruiged to see what a head crowning actually looks like
cant wait until next week