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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

What's the earliest age you would leave a teen overnight. i.e 9pm to 9am?

44 replies

Remotew · 10/09/2008 16:55

DD doesn't do sleepovers anymore hence never sleeps out full stop. I often get invited to sleepovers but always have to turn them down.

How long will I be restricted this way?

OP posts:
mumeeee · 10/09/2008 17:31

Not until they are 18.

Milliways · 10/09/2008 17:33

I would say 16, with access to your mobile / alerting neighbors.

Have left DS & DD alone together from when DD was 16, as long as she was comfortable with it and knew who was in next door etc.

The NSPCC also say no-one under 16 should be left alone overnight.

Milliways · 10/09/2008 17:34

I think we have done this twice - once getting home in early hours, the other after breakfast.

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 10/09/2008 17:51

16 is fine I think.

mumblechum · 10/09/2008 18:01

16 sounds about right to me, too, but it depends on how comfortable the teen is at the prospect.

Original poster
Remotew · 10/09/2008 18:48

Thank you. I have read that 16 is the guideline. Just been having a debate with DD over this. Going for a night out and stopping at a friends. She will be going to my sisters like it or not.

She is 14 and I knew it was too young to stop on her own but wanted other opinions.

OP posts:
unknownrebelbang · 10/09/2008 18:55

I would agree wtih 16.

DS1 is 14 and more than capable of looking after himself for one night, but I wouldn't leave him.

lazymumofteenagesons · 11/09/2008 17:28

Left DS1 for weekend when 16. We went abroad! He had relatives he could call if a problem who are 10 min drive away and he knows a couple of the neighbours. We gave strict instructions on guests - no more than 6 and they could stay the night (safety in numbers ??). Also we told him that if he abused our trust this would not happen again and we would still go away, but he would be shipped out to his aunty.

All was fine. I think he was much more careful than when we are at home. That said, I wouldn't have left him unless he was comfortable and I made other arrangements for his 13 year old brother.

Lilymaid · 11/09/2008 17:33

16/17 - but only if you think your DC is sensible. This year DS2 went on holiday and came back the day before we came back from our holiday. He had to get himself back from airport on public transport (train and bus) and then get himself to his Saturday job the next day. He isn't the sort to leave all doors open/hold a party advertised on Facebook/burn house down.

Divvy · 11/09/2008 17:36

Never, as they would be on face book in a flash organising a party!!

legally though you cant leave a under 16 past midnight on there own.

themoon66 · 11/09/2008 19:29

This is a timely thread. I am currently thinking of leaving DS (age 17) from a Saturday morning to a Sunday night, so I can do a short trip to France.

We live in a very safe village with MiL 10 mins drive away. He will just lie in bed until 12 noon and spend his time on gaming anyway.

zippitippitoes · 11/09/2008 19:30

i am sure that is not the case in england

legally though you cant leave a under 16 past midnight on there own.

trumpetgirl · 11/09/2008 20:03

My Dad was leaving me alone all night with 2 younger brothers to look after from being 12!!!!!
Not saying it's the right thing to do (he's an alcoholic, and general tosser) but I didn't realise it was that wrong!

noonki · 11/09/2008 20:04

15/16 depends on the kid

mrspnut · 11/09/2008 20:06

There is no lower age limit for leaving your child alone, it's all down to the parent's opinion and common sense.

I'd say 16 is about right for being alone over night as long as they know where they could go for help if needed.

Original poster
Remotew · 11/09/2008 21:58

Thanks again for more replies. She is only 14 so it would be illegal. I won't do it but it was she saying she will be OK. I would have been 5 miles away. She has agreed to go to her aunts nnow

Friends of mine have broken the 16 limit at 15. I know that she would be perfectly ok and definitely no trashing parties from bebo/facebook. She is 14 going on well not sure but more mature than I am at 47. The stork didn't bring her an alien did!

OP posts:
AbbeyA · 11/09/2008 22:15

You must be able to leave them at 16-they can get married at that age!

Original poster
Remotew · 11/09/2008 22:17

Crazy isnt it? You can leave let them babysit at 14 too.

OP posts:
StarlightMcKenzie · 11/09/2008 22:21

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Quattrocento · 11/09/2008 22:24

I don't know if you remember a yellow pages advert from years ago. Tennager home alone, has party, chaos ensues, he lets his fingers do the walking (phnarr) and order is restored in time for parents' return.

On that basis, NEVER.

Original poster
Remotew · 11/09/2008 22:29

It depends on the teen. They vary the same as we do. Oh where in Cumbria Starlight? I'm here now.

OP posts:
tatt · 11/09/2008 22:32

depends on the teen. Some would be 14 going on 24 and some 14 going on 4.

StarlightMcKenzie · 11/09/2008 22:46

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Original poster
Remotew · 11/09/2008 23:24

Staveley is just up the road from me! Its a bit hip now don't you know. Bit country hippy apart from the old timers. Do you still visit?

OP posts:
StarlightMcKenzie · 11/09/2008 23:44

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