Rural Teens: Who Funds Driving Lessons?

[U53rName]

Not learning to drive isn’t an option where we live, unfortunately. Who should fund driving lessons? If parents, how many, or an indefinite amount? (We both have good jobs, so it wouldn’t affect our family budget.)

From an early age driving garden tractors, then tractors, and graduating to being a named driver on family car and driving every mile that they as a teenager needed to travel, combined with 10 lessons = a pass with no minors.

Edited to add £2k grandparent contribution, plus their own savings from weekend jobs/birthday/Christmas money saved over the years (they're savers not spenders) = recent low mileage car that they still drive 6-10 years later.

my parents never paid for my lessons, so I didn't start learning to drive until I was 19 and started my full time civil service job. I had plenty of money to throw at it though as I was still living with them and saving for my own house. It took me nearly three years to learn and pass a test though because I tried for at least a year and a bit in a manual car and really struggled. I passed first time in an automatic.

Isn't it always parents?

I would pay if I could afford it as DD has only just left college. However, with her going to Uni for 3 years, she isn't planning on learning at the moment.

I can't afford to support her a bit through Uni and pay for driving lessons. If she gets a job, she might be able to pay for herself.

Her father keeps asking when she will start learning, but has not offered to pay anything towards lessons.

I had to pay for my own driving lessons, my parents could have paid but said it was my responsibility because I had a weekend job. It left me £10 a week to myself to cover clothes, going out and anything else I needed to buy. But my parents also insisted that I needed to learn as we also lived semi-rurally. I resented every second of those driving lessons and I will never forget it, please if you can afford it cover the lessons 😢

In my opinion, it’s a life skill and ideally parents should fund it

We did. We also bought the car and pay the insurance and fuel. The alternative is I am still an on demand chauffeur. I am thrilled to simply throw money at the problem and free up my time.

We will pay through university as the car is needed to get back and forth to our rural home.

Yes deffo. But my parents didn’t. Leaving school was the cut off.

We paid everything for as long as it took for dd. Considering it’s almost impossible to get a test before November now, why would your dh expect them to pay when you can afford it? There’ll be plenty of times for your dc to budget.

I took dd out a lot once she could drive places. She then dropped to fortnightly / 3 weekly, then as hoc. Once she knew the basics, she had all her lessons in her car, which she also used for her test.

She has just passed after 5 months with 1 minor. She’s an excellent driver, which was my goal. To be a driver. Not just to pass her test. And I did things like teach her to drive on gears in case her brakes failed etc. Unlikely these days, but these are all important skills.

If your dh want your dc to pay, that means your dc will have the bear minimum number of lessons, rather than be bullet proof. Why on earth would he want they for your child?

This is what we did. Sadly one took another 4.5 months to pass unlike the first one but it is what it is when they had no chance to earn any more than they were.

I don’t think it will affect the child’s motivation- but it might change yours! You need to be taking them out to practice daily. Get the miles in with them, particularly while you have light evenings. Sometimes the best way to learn is to do, and driving is definitely one of those things.

There obviously isn’t a right or wrong answer, but for us, my ‘deal’ is that we will fund driving lessons, a car and insurance BUT we will have strict rules in the first 6-12 months of passing. No driving friends, limited night driving (probably local), we have certain conditions around Pass Plus etc. The statistics around young men in particular and driving terrify me, I think it’s ludicrous the government didn’t take the opportunity to more dynamically manage new drivers this/last year, so this is how we are managing it.

Funnily enough, DS is quite happy with this deal!

Who else would?

We paid for ours. We’re also rural, not that it makes a difference. We’d have paid however long it took, but it didn’t take either of them very long.

They both then got cars and insurance for their 18ths.

It’s a life skill and v necessary in a rural setting if you don’t want to be forever giving them lifts.

You pay until they pass.

We paid half and half. But there were 3 in quick succession. We also paid for the theory test that they passed and the practical one they passed.

We paid, plus got a car, insurance etc. She was extremely determined and motivated and passed after 13 lessons (here you have to do 12).
It’s been amazing that she can now get herself where she needs to and I’m no longer a taxi service. Plus it gives better options for part time jobs.

It is a life skill, we can afford it, so to me it was no question that we fund it and get her on the road.

My parents paid for mine to begin with then expected me to self fund the rest. I couldn’t afford it as it would have meant I’d had nothing left from my part time job. From which I had to pay for my clothes and going anywhere. So I left my driving lessons until I got my first proper job. It was like learning all over again. I do look back on that and wonder why they didn’t just pay the rest so that I passed at the time?! We’re paying for our kids driving lessons.

PIL paid for DH and he passed first time at 17. My parents wouldn't pay at all and didn't think anyone should drive until 21 so I was really hampered and ended up not passing till I was 35 when we bought a car and I could practice regularly again. Having had a 13 year gap between blocks of lessons. Was really reliant on DH for holidays and trips anywhere for years and I hated it.

We will be paying for DC as soon as they turn 17 and until they pass. It

We agreed, when we chose to live rurally, that we would pay for anything the kids would need because of our choice.

i wish someone had paid for my provisional, lessons (i had a million lessons, im a slow learner) and car, insurance etc. I had to wait until i was mid 20s to do it all without help. it was hard. much like my whole life has been with very little help tbh! 😂

Maybe you could take a contribution of half DCs earnings towards the lessons. That way DH will get his 50% of something (granted it’s not 50% of lesson costs but it’s a large token) and will be happy and DC will be invested in passing.

By the sound of it we live somewhere similarly rural to you and will definitely fund DC learning to drive until they pass, it’s an essential life skill IMO for anyone who doesn’t live in London.
One of the younger guys at work doesn’t drive and he has to spend so much time hanging around waiting for buses and trains, he was always late because the trains were so unreliable so now he’s often an hour early(!) as that’s the only other option. Doesn’t get paid for it either as it’s not a role he can start until the rest of the team are in, so he’s literally just sitting in the canteen!

If my DS was earning decent money I would maybe have asked him to contribute but he wasn't, maximum of £35 per week, so obviously I paid for them.
Now he has a car and a job and pays his own insurance.