Would you let your 14yr old wear thongs?

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

I don’t want to, but I noticed last week when she was getting out of the car that when she’s wearing leggings, she is wearing her knickers wedged up her bum so as not to have a VPL, and it looks ridiculous as you can see the fabric bunched up at the top of her bum. She hasn’t asked for thongs but I’d rather she be comfortable, it can’t be comfy walking around with your knickers wedged up your bum all day! There’s no point telling her not to do it as she’d just put it back as soon as she was able to. Teenagers 🙄

On the one hand I’m like, “Thongs at 14?? No way!”
But on the other hand… it’s just knickers and no-one should be seeing them so it shouldn’t matter.
But still, 14 😬

Why are they vulgar? Surely they are the opposite - the point of a thong is to be invisible rather than drawing attention to your underwear.

They’re only vulgar and inappropriate to those who have deemed them a sexual garment, designed to please the male gaze only. I think they are very seldom worn for that purpose. I don’t wear them now because I’m more comfortable in my Bridgets but when I was a teenager I wore thongs when I didn’t want any attention drawn to my underwear.

I'm 100% my daughter's friend. AND her parent. Just as my own mom was, and still is, both my parent and one of my best friends.

A friendship with your kids, if you are lucky enough to genuinely like them as well as love them, isnt a bad thing, and in no way prevents you from raising them right.

Good parenting need not require a dictatorial power trip. As they grow older, it's entirely appropriate and healthy to give your children increasing autonomy over a whole range of matters. Definitely including their underwear!

Only wear thongs and find them far more comfortable than big pants. I've been wearing them since probably 12/13 as I used to dance and granny knickers under a leotard is definitely not a great look, and I never fancied going commando in ballet class! Never really thought of them as a sexy thing, just practical.

I think this is exactly it. I don’t think I realised it until you said it though. It’s a really difficult internal battle for me, thongs are so often deemed as sexy which I obviously don’t want to encourage 😅 but when I was the exact age she is now, I was pregnant and my knickers made zero difference to that, the boy I was with was just happy to be there. The absolute last thing I want for her is to go down the same path I did so maybe I feel I have to protect her more? I dunno. I don’t stop her wearing crop tops or short-ish shorts (though I do draw the line at shorts with her cheeks hanging out…)

Thank you everyone for your input, it’s been really insightful actually, and I’ll talk to DD and ask what she’d like to do.

This is nothing to be getting your knickers in a twist about 😂

I've been wearing them since I was 13. Why? Because they're comfortable for me. Something that's not comfortable for one person may be comfortable for another.

You're really over thinking this 😂😂😂

Talk to her about how a thong is a bacterial highway 😬

This. 👌

Men are fucking pathetic aren’t they

You can get no visible pant line pants, just get her them! Non-VPL

But it isn't. Thongs are perfectly comfortable and hygienic as long as they're the correct size and a person is generally clean.

Loads of young girls who dance and do competitive gymnastics wear thongs regularly.

I’m 34 and bought my own back in the noughties when I about 13/14 (tammy girl lol). I don’t see a problem with it? What’s the difference to wearing any other type of underwear? That being said, you can get good seamless ones now if you’d prefer to offer a choice. My only negative is that mine had some gross slogans on but I would like to think we have moved away from that weird stuff.

My mum is generally very old fashioned but I definitely started wearing them younger than 14.

I can’t stand them now, though.

Good lord. ‘ Vulgar’. They are just pants. There is nothing sexual about them. I’m 52 and a size 18 and I wear plain cotton thongs from M&S because they are the only pants I find comfortable. I can’t bear the feel of elastic around my bum cheeks. I’ve been wearing them since I was about 15. Added bonus is no VPL which is also hideous and pretty inevitable with a fat arse like mine with any other pant.
Mist of my friends wear them too. Not for any other reason than comfort.

Why would they? I don’t know about you, but personally I wipe my bum after I go to the loo like any other normal, and therefore don’t have shit sitting in my bum crack.

Nobody’s poking their thong into their rectum, you know. Unless they have a very niche fetish, which I doubt is the case for 99.9% of thong wearers.

Mine does, again bought then herself when with friends and wears them with the appropriate clothing. It’s the same as wearing a strapless bra with a top that needs one to me.

I’d have no problem.

Matalan however do some lovely Non vpl shorts that also work under leggings. They have things in the same material as well. I have both and alternate.

Some vpl pants are just as good so it may be a case of finding what she prefers. Cotton pants with the elastic leg time will always show under anything jersey and/or tight but there’s an array of things between them and thongs.

At 14 I’d let her find her preference but you may need to instigate the discussion.

Life is difficult enough when you’re 14 without having to wedge regular pants up your arse so I’d let her.

I don’t recall ever having a convo with my now adult (and super successful!) DD about buying thongs - they just started appearing in the washing at about 14 and then I started buying that style going forward.

current teen DD is a little less keen on thongs but hated the look of bunched knickers under her leggings so has transitioned to Brazilians.

seems like the last thing it’s worth having a fight about

I bought them for dd2 when she was about 12.5. She does a lot of dance in leotards and tight leggings.
One day in tescos she asked for them and I couldn’t find a reason to say no. They were flesh coloured high waist ones - hardly ann summers!
I was a bit anxious about what her dad would think but he hasn’t passed any comment.
ive bought her loads now as she needs them. She does about 6/7 hours of dance a week and more when there are shows. She has all kinds of invisible underwear.

She’s 13 now. Incidentally she (and dd1 who is 16 and thinks thongs are bizarre and has no interest) wears tights and cycling shorts under her school skirt every day. No interest whatsoever about wearing underwear to please boys or even show them!

#bringbacklasenza
#whaletail

Yep I was wearing them at 14 😂

I came in here wondering what was wrong about wearing thongs on your feet, because they’re practical, versatile and comfy. Realised that it’s g-string thongs, not footwear thongs. Yes, I’m Australian.

What’s wrong with a VPL? Why are so many of you horrified by a VPL? And especially so under leggings?

I wouldn’t buy them for my teen girl. I wouldn’t be letting her go out in leggings either unless she had a long top on that covered to below her bum. Yes I prefer less skin on show and looser fitting clothes, especially on a teen girl. I wouldn’t let her out in a crop top either. I’d assume it was underwear and ask where her shirt was. Thankfully DD has no desire to wear tight or short clothing and much prefers loose clothes.

Call me old fashioned. I don’t care.

Absolutely, if that's what she wanted.

I wore thongs from about that age - I'd picked the wrong ones up when shopping for underwear and we didn't notice until got home. When I tried them on, I genuinely found them more comfortable, and have ever since.

I think policing a young persons underwear choices is very very weird

I have some of these, there's no hem at all at the leg, and they really are invisible under leggings. Just have to make sure they are lying flat and don't get wrinkled up when you put the leggings on.

https://www.primark.com/en-gb/p/3pk-fashion-invisible-mini-briefs-pink-991108357306