Accidentally booked holiday for A level results day 2026. DD mad at me!

[Onecrazymama]

My DD is sitting her A levels next year in 2026 and then planning a gap year. She isn't even sure about going to University at all and despite being predicted all A's for her her subjects she isn't planning to apply to a university for 2026. She may apply for a 2027 place though once she realises what hard work getting a real job is 🤦🏻‍♀️.

So I went ahead and booked a package holiday for August 2026 to Spain for her, my husband and other child. Then about a week after I'd booked I realised it would mean we are away for her A level results day 🤦🏻‍♀️. We'll be back 5 days later, she can get a friend to collect them for her and obviously as she's not planning to go to uni I thought she'd be absolutely fine about this.

However, she has caused an huge fuss and wants me to change it! I've looked into moving it until after results day but it is going to cost £320 extra. We really can't afford that and the holiday itself is already alot more than we would usually spend and it's going to push our finances as it is. We booked the holiday as treat for her to be away for her birthday, celebrate finishing school etc and now I feel terrible. I don't know what to do for the best! Right now I feel like cancelling it completely 😞. She's being horrible to me, telling me she won't come on holiday and saying I'm being selfish. My husband says he doesn't want to discuss it! As far as he's concerned we aren't changing the date as it isn't actually important or necessary for her to collect her results in person as she isn't going to uni. Does anyone have any advice or just something to make me feel better 😞

Rude.

Is he her Dad?

Yes he is her Dad but they are always arguing at the moment unfortunately 😕

I don’t think it matters whether she needs the result for Uni or not. She’ll have worked hard for 2 years and want to collect her results. I think you should move the holiday. I’m afraid it’s your fault for not checking the date.

Why did you not check that the dates worked for her before you booked? Surely that's normal in most families even if results day isn't involved. Teenagers have stuff on/Saturday jobs etc etc. You check that the dates work for everyone in your family before you book anything.

In this case remind him that she is his daughter so the half of her character traits coming from him.

I'd change the date and pay the extra £320.

I can’t believe her A Levels seem to matter so little to you and your DH. Of COURSE she wants to collect her results in person. This day is a really big deal for most students - and for their parents, usually 🤨

So many of these answers are irrelevant. It doesn’t matter that results can be texted or picked up online or what anyone else’s children was happy doing when they got theirs.
The OP’s DD wanted to be in the country, picking up her results with her friends, in person.
I just can’t really believe you didn’t even ask her before you did this. I’m not surprised she’s upset. I’d be cancelling or changing it.

We booked it purely because it's somewhere she has always wanted to go! She has specifically asked to go to this resort and we're actually paying more money as instead of flying from our local airport we're having to fly from another airport because the local one doesn't fly to this destination!

I do think it matters but just completely messed the dates up!

But you didn’t bother to ask her when was a good time for her to go? I don’t want to be rude but you have made a big mistake here. You need to fix it.

My DS is pretty chill but going out with ‘everyone’ to spoons on results day has been his social highlight of the summer.

I’d change it and suck up the extra cost. As someone else has said it’s less than £1 per day.

Don't change it. Exams results or not, the world doesn't revolve around her and you have treated her to a nice holiday. She should be grateful

FFS don’t change your holiday.

There must be a way of getting them without being there in person.

Speak to the school secretary and/or the Headteacher.

Last resort, give PoA to a friend.

I still remember results day being one of the happiest days, and had a great day and night celebrating with friends. I think probably that’s what she is worried about missing. If you can change it, and appreciate it’s expensive, it would be a nice thing to do.

Personally I would argue it's worth spending the money to change the dates given it's a rite of passage that only happens once - even if she's not going to uni she's still celebrating the culmination of two years' work. I know £320 is not nothing but it's a year away - could you sell something or give up something as a family for a little bit?

Your DH is the main obstacle - I'd argue on principle that you shouldn't have to fund moving the holiday yourself just because he's decided he doesn't think results day is important. (I guess you should have checked, but I'm also guessing you carry a lot of the mental load).

I'm sorry that this has happened, it sounds like you were really excited to do a nice thing for your DD. Hopefully you all still get to go.

I remember results day. Vividly. Even though it’s more than 5 decades ago.

I was away on holiday with friends. Had to call the school secretary - at vast expense - to get my results.

All good.

I can see why. Is education of your children and them being able to celebrate their successes with their peers not important to you op?

I agree with previous posts, you need to change the date. She’s clearly worked really hard and this is a key milestone for her. She wants to be there in person and get the results with all her friends etc which is not unreasonable.

Then it isnt even a question. Change the dates. And look closely at your husband who sounds like s bully.

As you’ve now realised that you’ve messed the dates up, you need to find a way to sorr out the mistake I think.

it’s very likely that the sooner you do it, the less it will cost.

a lot can happen in a year. She may decide to go to university . She may decide to go to uni on results day. Results day is a really important day to be in school and with teachers get feedback on ab remarks etc. It’s the the real ‘last day of school’ hugely significant. More importing that GCSEs imo.

Did she agree to you booking the holiday over results day?

So not like op’s dd will be with a father who is constantly arguing with her? Which doesnt quite sound all good at all.