What time do you let your 14 year old out untill?

[LuckyGoldBird]

We live in a small seaside town, they've all been going to the beach in the hot days and to the park on the not so hot..

What time do you let your 14 year old girls out untill??

I don't want to be unreasonable with timings she has to be in, her friends mum says 8 latest.. Ive said half 9. But some. Of her friends are out and about untill 10/10.30

Just curious to what other parents do.

Who's putting 14yr olds to bed? I feel like some people on this thread live in a different world from me!

Clearly.

No, we definitely weren't

Is it a class thing? I was regularly getting in at 10pm, putting a ready meal in the microwave, hoping the beep didn’t wake my mum at 11pm

Even my 16 year old has to be home by 9pm! At 14 it would have been 8pm at the very latest.

At 14? That’s quite a bleak upbringing.

Around here the teens are in the beach til late. It’s pretty safe and adults who happen to be around do kept an eye and community support officer is summoned if anything is getting out of hand, mostly it’s listening to music on the beach

Lights out at 9:30 for a 14 year old here.

They don't go out wandering though, only out for organised activities or to a friend's house.

9ish for my dd but I prioritise how she's getting home rather than when
If a friend has a different time and it means they can walk together then I'll go with the different time.
Wondering how many of the home at 8pm 14 year old are 1st children?

It's my third.

utter nonsense.

It's quite normal for teens to just hang out with friends. how on earth do we expect out children to survive when parents stop doing 'organised' activities for them

The nights dd has clubs she's not getting home till 9ish anyway, so then still needs a shower etc. How do you get them in bed so early, no activities?

Ours would have been winding down at 9.30. Certainly bathed or showered and organising their stuff for the following morning. They had far too many commitments to be at the park or hanging about anywhere. Sunday to Thursday were school nights. Friday/Saturday evenings were organised.

Sunday to Thursday nights were school nights until after A'Levels.

Depends entirely on what they are doing - friends house, party, event, gig then I'm happy for him to stay out until it finishes so long as he has organised a lift back.
Just hanging out at the park or wandering the streets then definitely back before dark.

We live in a rough northern town. My 15 year old does not go out unless it’s somewhere organised. I’d have to be insane to allow him to wander around the streets and I really can’t believe other people let their kids do this. Here kids from decent families do structured activities usually during the day and certainly never out after dark unless you want to be choosing their coffin before they’re 16.

No. Teenagers need unstructured and unsupervised time with their peers. This is crucial for their development.

When maturity catches up with them. My DC were pretty independent actually.

Dd has clubs three nights a week, but the latest they finish is 7:30.

well obviously they were not independent at all if you were organising all their activities

I thought we were talking about Saturday nights . Anyway I don't think it's healthy for every moment of teens lives to be organised and timetabled. A bit of down time, freedom and independence is a positive thing.

My 14 year old goes out on a Friday and hangs out with her friends. Sometimes at the park sometimes they play foorball or grab some food.
I usually say I’ll pick up around 9pm or she gets a lift about then.

saturdays they are more likely to be at someone’s house.

My 9 year old daughter is at football training until 8.15pm in the summer!
Mine aren’t that age yet but I can’t imagine being happy with them hanging around at parks until 9.30pm when they’re 14. If they were at an activity or a friend’s house I’d be more concerned about how they were getting home than what time, but hanging around on the street? Not past 8.30pm.

Exactly! I think it totally depends on where you live, inner city, small town, village, your own upbringing, how engaged you are as a parent

My Dd does have time doing what she wants in town with her friends, just during the day rather than in the evening.

FFS, why do some people not see that time spent hanging out with friends ‘un-structured’ does not mean ‘getting fingered behind a bin’ or on crack. It is good for teens to just ‘be’ with their friends in the same way that we just are with our friends.