Daughter unlikely to pass her A levels

[FavouritePJs]

my DD has always struggled at school and just managed to scrape 5 GCSE passes to enable her to be accepted into 6th form college. She works really hard, has great attendance, fully engages in lessons, does her homework and currently is doing nothing but revise, however, based on all the previous papers that she has completed
in lessons and her mocks, she’s on course to fail badly. One of her courses is a BTEC which she has passed with distinction but the exam side of things just doesn’t work for her. She’s just sat with me absolutely distraught as all of her friends are smart and she can’t face results day when they will be celebrating, she feels embarrassed and ashamed. We obviously support her unconditionally but how do I help her deal with the way she is feeling? I know as parents we always want to make everything better but I’m struggling with how to do this. Thankfully she decided long ago that uni was not for her at this stage in her life so she isn’t worried about that, but I don’t want her to feel stupid/embarressed/ashamed/failure - her words not mine. Has anyone else been through this with their child?

A quick Google shows several unis accepting EE for criminology honours degrees

@1SillySossij That’s just as absolutely stupid as he’d trying to do A levels with 5s at GCSE! It’s bums on seats and 100% poor advice. Many have suggested this needs to stop. It’s yet another route to not very much .

Sounds very low and not worth the expense. Op, does the college offer Public Services courses? If so the careers department should know what the potential progression routes are and provide relevant Information and Guidance sessions.

Sounds like she is just not good at applying herself at exams, does she stress out. Does she read the questions properly. Sometimes it’s not what you know but how to convey it. Does she know what she ultimately wants to do? There are normally various routes into most professions…look at alternative way to get her to where she wants to be. If she fails further studies but in a different form might be the way to go. Tell her not be disheartened, she will get there.

No decent ones, I’ll bet.

Don't put words in my mouth! I am not giving advice, I was responding to your erroneous assertion that no degree course would accept such low grades. Please learn to read!

Leeds and Birmingham, for example, require AAB.

I see far too many students being accepted to degree programmes to fill targets only to struggle and end up with a poor outcome, complete waste of money and time. I would not advise anyone to go to uni unless they enjoy academic challenge. Luckily there are lots of alternative routes to most professions these days.

FFS I was not advising her to do that. If you looked at the thread I said she should not even have gone on to A levels. The post you quote was clearly a response to the poster who said no degree courses were available for her grades.

Schools only talk about A levels usually. The first they hear of other options is when I speak to them.

@FavouritePJs I’d emphasise style of learning. BTEC seems to suit her. Are there other colleges that could offer this?

I was not criticising you, only using your data to make a point that in my opinion accepting someone with EE to a degree course is madness unless there are good reasons for the low results. So I fully agree with you.

This thread has become really unhelpful to the OP and full of really smug and opinionated responses. Sometimes MN loves a good 'A level failure' post. OP for what it is worth my friends son is starting police training with similar results to your daughter - no degree - he left sixth form in Yr 12 and did a level 3 apprentiship. She will find her way.

@1SillySossij By posting she could do a degree with EE is implying this is an option. I know you were trying to prove me wrong but no degree course should be available on an apprenticeship - which is what I was getting at. It’s ridiculous for any university to offer at this low level unless it’s a portfolio arts type course. Therefore any student would be ill advised to go near such a course.

Just jumping back on here to point out that there is a Law Access to HR diploma. It’s the one my DD is doing. Started at 19, turned 20 a few weeks ago, but you have to be 19 or over. It is free. Offered at local tech and Adult ed colleges. DD opted for Law, history and sociology options. There are no exams whatsoever. It is all done my assignments. Each module has 3 assignments which earn 15 credits in total, so 45 for the whole course. Her sociology tutor is an ex copper - CID/Murder squad.

An access course will not only get you into a good uni (my DD is going to a RG) but also onto degree apprenticeships.

That’s really helpful, thank you

Thank you, I appreciate the support both for me
and my daughter but also this thread, it’s quite depressing to read a lot of the responses.

There's a lot and on the whole they are good employers.

My Mum did years on the 999 calls, it's shift work but fairly well paid and quite exciting.

I’ve had students go into be 999 call handlers after A levels.
See if she can get an appointment with the careers team at college or the local careers office.
Another option is to do a business apprenticeship at level 3 then use that to get the job she wants

It’s a tricky time as school is linear and then it becomes a maze of options. If she sees things as opportunities to gain a certain set of skills she will eventually get something she likes.

Thank you. I have emailed her form tutor today about careers advice so hopefully the college will be able to offer some assistance.

@FavouritePJs I actually think most people have been realistic and forward looking plus no one wants your DD to feel like a failure again. Hence trying to steer away from degrees and very difficult to attain jobs. I think being realistic is fair. Lots of positive stories too and I could add my own but it’s a long time ago now so worthless! I did learn that finding your niche is key though and I’d definitely pass that on.

Why has she not been able to access careers advice before? I can see A levels were leaning towards police and associated careers and you can research these further. I’m assuming DD didn’t choose law and criminology at random.

I agree that people have been realistic in offering advice, I was really referring to the finger pointing and blame game, it’s not helping either of us. Some of the comments have been condescending and just plain awful, I should have expected that. She chose Law and Crim as she was just interested but beyond that had no idea how she wanted that interest to develop, it’s probably in the last 12 months she’s spoken about apprenticeship options and has started narrowing down what she would really like. It isn’t helping with the stress of the here and now but I fully take on board that once this difficult period is over, she can move on and look forward.

I walked out before my A levels so I do get this. But you cannot put the genie back in that bottle readily. So go forward in a sensible attainable way and she will find what she wants. Don’t forget 63% of school leavers are not doing degrees. They are not failures - they are doing things differently.

I don’t agree. In fact I think it’s awful to make a child do an exam because it’s been paid for anyway.

She needs to see that the adults around her have stepped up to the mark and said, this was all a huge mistake and you can draw a line in the sand and walk away right now if you want to.

No one knows what doing the exams is going to cost this girl (even just) emotionally in the long term but I’m pretty sure it’s a lot more than the couple of hundred pounds (?) it will cost her parents.

She needs to know that it’s ok to march to your own tune and she doesn’t have to be part of the herd mentality others are caught up in because of pressure from family and educators.

The time to do that is not a week away from the start of the exams.

We absolutely will support her if she doesn’t want to continue, there will be no pressure either way and no recriminations, we just want what is best for her and for her to be happy in whatever form that takes and she will find that path.