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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Child has been missing since 9pm - frantic !

449 replies

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 04:03

I don’t even know if anyone is awake to read this but my neurodivergent 13 yr old son left the house quietly at 9pm and hasn’t come home . I caught him out about something pretty awful he had done, and he denied it and left rather than deal with it / talk about it , he left.

We live in central London and he’s gone without keys , phone or money . After 2 hours driving around looking for him, l reported to the police and they have him now listed as a vulnerable missing person but l’m going out of my mind .

Has any other parent experienced this ? My head is going to a thousand awful scenarios …it’s 4 am now and so cold .

OP posts:
EdithBond · 08/05/2025 09:10

Thinking of you OP ❤️

Kids usually turn up when they do this. Think of all the places he feels calm and safe. Parks are a good shout in London. Canal or river banks. Libraries. Buses. Somewhere near school.

He’ll feel very isolated without his phone, so hopefully that’ll make him come back sooner rather than later.

Keep hydrated. Sugary tea if you can. If anyone can help, then ask them to get you some packets of nuts and dried fruit. Anything you can munch on to keep your strength up if you can’t stomach a meal.

Sunnyside4 · 08/05/2025 09:12

I really hope you've had some positive news soon.

I'm sure you've already done it, but if you have contact details for any of his friends/parents of friends don't be afraid to contact them and ask if they've any ideas where he could be. If he hasn't gone to school, the school maybe willing to have an assembly for those in his year at some point urging them to come forward if they know anything.

Bonkersdogmum · 08/05/2025 09:14

Keeping everything crossed for you OP!

Tangerinenets · 08/05/2025 09:15

I really hope you’ve found him now. Xx keeping everything crossed .

twinmumoffour85 · 08/05/2025 09:15

Thinking of you OP. WhatsApp is a great tool for things like this. I know Facebook can also be good but it can also attract unwanted attention/scammers etc. If still missing I would send a message to as many mums you can in your local area and ask them to share. I would also email the school and ask them to email all parents. Really hoping for a positive update soon.

Bubblybits · 08/05/2025 09:16

Wishing you luck, OP. You must be worried sick, but I’m sure it’s all going to work out ♥️

dontforgetme · 08/05/2025 09:19

Thinking of you op!

wishIwasonaBeach · 08/05/2025 09:19

Hope you come back here with good news soon OP
Sending you lots of love ❤

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 08/05/2025 09:20

I am also thinking of you and your son, OP! Good luck ❤️❤️❤️

YourLoyalPlumOP · 08/05/2025 09:23

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 04:03

I don’t even know if anyone is awake to read this but my neurodivergent 13 yr old son left the house quietly at 9pm and hasn’t come home . I caught him out about something pretty awful he had done, and he denied it and left rather than deal with it / talk about it , he left.

We live in central London and he’s gone without keys , phone or money . After 2 hours driving around looking for him, l reported to the police and they have him now listed as a vulnerable missing person but l’m going out of my mind .

Has any other parent experienced this ? My head is going to a thousand awful scenarios …it’s 4 am now and so cold .

I work for search and rescue.

pleaser call 999. The sooner they know the quicker they can get us out

We have much more specialist training than the police do and we spend years learning how to do this we studied statistics and everything

So please, please call the police immediately because we cannot deploy without them

AlmostSummer25 · 08/05/2025 09:24

I hope he's home now.

biggest hugs!!

we should chip babies like we chip puppies!

YourLoyalPlumOP · 08/05/2025 09:24

The central London team is amazing!!!

YourLoyalPlumOP · 08/05/2025 09:25

We’ve been out for many many many children….

they deploy everyone possible normally

we have Search And Rescue out we have the Coast Guard we have the dog team we have a specialist training teams we have the high risk teams and we have the helicopters usually when a child is missing

mechanicalpencil · 08/05/2025 09:28

Hoping your son is back home safe and sound very soon OP 💜

BeethovenNinth · 08/05/2025 09:28

Thinking of you OP and hoping for a good outcome

KhakiOrca · 08/05/2025 09:29

Hope he's found safe amd well OP.

Pheasantplucker2 · 08/05/2025 09:33

Thinking of you OP. Also have ND children and have had this with one of my children, luckily they had their phone and I was able to track them.

They had gone to their grandfather's grave in the cemetery at 2am because they were upset. Their grandfather had died years ago, so it wasn't a recent bereavement. I'm just sharing in case that might be a possibility for your son.

Other places I would think about looking are bus and train stations, and anywhere local that they spend a lot of time or consider special. Is there anywhere that they've spent time with a friend or a family member that might make them feel safe? A park or a wood?

I really hope you get him back safe and sound soon. You must be frantic with worry - sending you big hugs from me.

theDudesmummy · 08/05/2025 09:34

@yourloyalplumOP ffs read the thread.

theDudesmummy · 08/05/2025 09:34

I have an autistic teenager too. Thinking of you OP.

ThousandYardStare · 08/05/2025 09:39

I'm thinking of you. My son is same age, also London, I can't imagine how distressed and sick you feel. I hope you have him safely home soon

lunaswand · 08/05/2025 09:45

You must be so worried, have any of his friends got in touch yet? Have you also sent them texts?

TeenToTwenties · 08/05/2025 09:46

Don't forget to contact the school, they can talk to his friends.

2JFDIYOLO · 08/05/2025 09:49

All the very best to your family. X

YesHonestly · 08/05/2025 09:50

YourLoyalPlumOP · 08/05/2025 09:23

I work for search and rescue.

pleaser call 999. The sooner they know the quicker they can get us out

We have much more specialist training than the police do and we spend years learning how to do this we studied statistics and everything

So please, please call the police immediately because we cannot deploy without them

Show quote history

She called the police during the night, they’re already out looking.

Nevermindkitten · 08/05/2025 09:50

Thinking of you OP. A lot of children go missing and almost all are found very quickly. I would be frantic too of course.

You may have done this already (apologies I haven't read all the posts) but of course if might help to share his picture on Facebook local groups ect. This seemed like sensible advice in case useful
https://www.westyorkshire.police.uk/advice/missing-persons/missing-person-social-media-posters-and-publicity

Just wanted to join others in offering support really. Hope he is home very soon 💜

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