DS’s girlfriend is pregnant.

[Mondayblues6]

DS is 17 years old and his girlfriend is 16. They have been sleeping together a few months. I talked to him about contraception but he told me his girlfriend was not keen keen to go on the pill but they used condoms. Today he he told me that his girlfriend is 6 weeks pregnant. They are both very upset. They have already told his girlfriend’s mum and she has arranged for her to have an abortion. My son’s girlfriend is so upset that she will never get over this and that she is doing the wrong thing. My son is being very supportive and has told his girlfriend that he will support any decision she makes. My son is so sad and responsible that this happened. I have given him a hig and told him I will be there for them both. What else can I do?

I would say, I had an abortion in December. I bitterly regret it. I've always had robust mental health but this is the worst I've ever felt and after a bit of a breakdown yesterday I've sought counselling. All these people saying "she'll get over it" or "won't regret it", that may not be true. She probably will think about this baby everyday for the rest of her life. I'm not saying she shouldn't have one, but her feelings that she'll never get over it could be true.

No shit sherlock

If there was a chance I'd birth a kitten I'd have definitely gone for No.3

@CascaChan presumably she's also having doubts about having a baby at 16 tho? If she was confident she wanted to do that, she'd do it I guess. Unfortunately it's not possible to restore the previous status quo and go back to never having got pregnant in the first place. And it's impossible to know how she will feel about this in the future. But better to regret an abortion than regret a baby. And plenty on here regret having kids even when married/in their 30s with money!

He or she is human.
Humans conceive humans, not reptiles or birds etc.

Why resist this simple fact?
I don’t understand why this is so difficult to accept.

No such complex feelings when it’s just a ball of cells though…?

I’m very sorry you’re feeling like this but it’s not a baby yet and she is very unlikely to think of it every day for the rest of her life. My second son was stillborn at 35 weeks and I don’t think about him every day, probably a few times a year. She will get over it. You will get over it. I hope you’re feeling better very soon.

@AgileGreenSeal because you are using the fact it has skin and a heartbeat as a reason not to abort. So I'm refuting that by also referring to its physical characteristics. Which at this point are such that you can't tell if it's a human or a duckbilled platypus.

I'm not sure why you're still hanging around on this thread.

You are a pro-lifer.

That's fine.

But please stop your somewhat patronising and yet unscientific comments.

You're very unlikely to change anyone's mind although 10/10 for trying!

Sounds like you’re doing everything you can to support them. How are YOU feeling? I can imagine it’s a lot for you too 💐

Children should not be having children! The girls mother is absolutely bloody right, 16 is no age to bring a child into the world. She still has so much growing and maturing and LIFE to live. They will regret it so much if she goes through with it.

I had no intentions of posting so much, but since you and others keep asking me questions I thought it would be impolite not to reply. Hence my responses.

So what are you getting out of this?

What you have at 6 weeks is something which is basically. Set of cancerous cells. The determination of sex happens between week 6 and week 8, where these cells start to act on what is present in the chromosomes. The cells which have decided to be Brain cells have no sentient thought, they have less neurons formed than an ant. It isn't until week 7 that it starts to create about 100 neurons per second. It's the size of a pea. However none of that matters. We are a pro choice nation. We let people make choices because we know that they can and should have a different upbringing, life experiences to ourselves so if they feel that they would not be good parents today we accept that. If they feel that they could be good parents but need a bit of financial support, then we give them that financial support through our socialist support systems and we provide free training for parents to be. and health visitors, online resources and Patel classes. Ultimately we accept that their choice is far more important than my, yours or anyone else's opinion.

@HumptyDumptysWife maybe she's hanging around on the thread waiting for the baby to be born so she can adopt it or pay for its upkeep? As she feels so strongly about it.

The only relevant scientific fact is this - it will destroy this girl's body and life. She will no doubt love her baby but on some level might wish her parents had steered her to the sensible decision.

I regret having my DD (who I wanted so much) more than I regret my earlier abortion that I felt I had no choice in. Not because I don't love her, but because of a whole lot of complex reasons. So yeah I totally agree with you.

Every comment has been 100% scientific and easily verifiable online.
Im not posting my opinion. Just facts.

I was here to support the OP. Not spread opinions I should keep to myself

“The only relevant scientific fact is this - it will destroy this girl's body and life”

Absolutely not a verifiable fact.

I haven’t posted any opinions
Only facts, easily verifiable.

But @AgileGreenSeal you're cherry-picking scientific facts. Only the emotive ones about skin and heartbeats. Not the ones about the embryo having a tail and being barely visible. You're not providing a full or objective picture.

I never said those were reasons not to abort.

@MissSkegness1951 Her mother is supporting her daughter, not coercing.

Why is it that most mothers would (reluctantly) rather their daughter had an abortion at 16 than a baby? (Going by the posts on this thread).

Is it because the mothers KNOW how hard it is to have a baby and actually have their own child's best interests at heart? (And perhaps also the "grandchild's")?

The fetus is living human, yes. Call it a fetus, call it an unborn baby, call it Darren - personally I don’t care in the slightest. A woman should absolutely have the right to terminate a pregnancy, kill if you’d rather, legally and safely.