DS’s girlfriend is pregnant.

[Mondayblues6]

DS is 17 years old and his girlfriend is 16. They have been sleeping together a few months. I talked to him about contraception but he told me his girlfriend was not keen keen to go on the pill but they used condoms. Today he he told me that his girlfriend is 6 weeks pregnant. They are both very upset. They have already told his girlfriend’s mum and she has arranged for her to have an abortion. My son’s girlfriend is so upset that she will never get over this and that she is doing the wrong thing. My son is being very supportive and has told his girlfriend that he will support any decision she makes. My son is so sad and responsible that this happened. I have given him a hig and told him I will be there for them both. What else can I do?

You’re putting words in my mouth.
I haven’t said any such thing.

Yep. Thats why Purposefully didn't write 24 weeks because in this precise case we have no idea for the potential health issues this foetus might have.

I had an abortion at 25 - never thought I'd find myself in that situation at that age but I did. My Mum urged me to get one - I felt like everyone pressured me and I was very upset with them. It took me a while to get over the abortion but god my Mum was right and I'm glad I listened to her.

Again, I ask you, what are you getting out of this? I find it extremely sad

But you aren't providing information.

You're trying to impose your opinion, if it's religious perhaps, on other women.

The language you're using it not informative, it's inflammatory, inaccurate, prejudiced, and meant to try to cause upset.

If you are pro-life and don't believe in abortion, that's up to you.

It's not your role to impose that on anyone else.

The world has changed, thank goodness, from when people with your beliefs meant that women had back street abortions and died OR left their newborn babies in the gutter to die.

You want to go back to that?

Maybe @AgileGreenSeal would like to adopt this baby? Or sponsor it into adulthood?

It's the poor "grandparents" I feel sorry for. They get no say in whether the baby is born or not and yet they will doubtless shoulder the time/energy/money burden if it is.

He or she is human and is living & growing.
He or she has skin, a beating heart and developing brain & organs.

These are simply scientific facts at 6 weeks of pregnancy. I would have thought this would be widely known.

I wouldn't shoulder that burden.

If it were my 16 year old or 17 year old I would be making it clear any baby they have is their responsibility.

Aye ok @AgileGreenSeal it also STILL HAS A FUCKING TAIL!!!! AT THAT POINT!

It’s still a cluster of cells. It’s a potential human being, invisible to the human eye.

Who has asked for clarification?

No one.

This is a bit close to home, with a soon-to-be 17-year-old DS who has a gf. Accidents happen!

But they seem to have a lovely, supportive family on both sides which is wonderful. Contraception is rarely bullet proof (!) but condoms probably less so and, so far, no male pills!

it's great they've told you early so that an abortion can be done soon and safely.

I actually got pregnant accidentally when I was in my early 30s, despite the pill etc. Shocked me and my boyfriend (of 8 years; now husband) and we very quickly decided that we just weren't ready for that sort of commitment. Opted for an abortion via one of the Mary Stopes centres (think that's what they were called). I honestly have never regretted it!

A child should be wanted. Good luck and big hugs to your lovely son and gf.

Oh just stop.

You don't believe in abortion.

So?

Do you also believe women shouldn't make their own choices?

It's very clear you can't argue that point very well.

Aye but realistically...would you stand firm on that...? Really never contribute time/money/energy to your own child's child? Your grandchild? If so, then you are a harder woman than me! I'd THREATEN my child that they would be on their own if they got pregnant but in reality if they gave birth at age 13, 30 or 47, I'd be on hand to help out.

Giving scientific information =/= applying to be an adoptive parent. What a crazy assumption to make.

I agree.

@Sofearfull Lots of very strange posts on here.

They're doing the right thing...

No, I'm just assuming that as you are so against this abortion taking place, that you will step up and care for the child emotionally/practically and financially.

I believe if such a choice is made it should be made with all the scientific facts, in other words informed choice.

Yes I would. I don't want grandchildren anyway. I'd bill and coo if one arrived but I certainly would not get involved in looking after one or providing free childcare.

I am sure people old enough to have sex, get a pregnancy test and arrange an abortion are informed and educated enough to realise that the thing inside them growing is going to be a human at the end and not a puppy.

If she is having doubts that she wants an abortion she will probably regret it. I speak from experience.

I’ve actually just repeated what science tells us about an embryo at 6 weeks of pregnancy.

@K0OLA1D the irony of course is that currently the embryo is indistinguishable from any other species' embryo. It could easily be canine. Indeed, it's not even possible to tell if it's a mammal. Could be a reptile, amphibian or a bird at this point.

Is that a good enough scientific fact to pass onto the pregnant teen, @AgileGreenSeal ?

He or she is human now. There’s no magical change of species in the birth canal.