Son has ordered something suspicious by post

[SpangledShambles]

He’s 18. It’s disguised as choc squares and obviously it’s an illegal substance. He’s away atm. I had gut feel from recent conversations and from the shape and feel of package and opened it. I don’t usually open other people’s post of course but this is my son’s welfare, also my money and my home address. I’m trying to work out best approach to deal with this. Any advice? It’s the first time he’s done this.

so then he gets no allowance unless you know what the money is going on?

Yes his allowance will be stopped. I will be explaining why but will do it face to face so he can’t wriggle. I will be explaining the points about my address, my home. I have been interested hearing all your opinions.

I'd leave him to it if he's generally a good kid. I'm not sure he'll take this invasion into his privacy well and we were all young once

Good luck, OP. Living with older teenagers is a life of constantly reassessing the relationship.

He is a good kid but gets into some pretty alarming messes. He does have SEN - just replying to pp.

Tiny Mazatec Chocolate looks like magic mushroom chocolate. Seems you can buy it on Etsy of all places.

But do consider the lesson you are teaching by opening an adult's post.

Sometimes we do the wrong things for reasons we consider to be right. His view on the "right reasons" may differ of course, and you should be ready for a rational debate with him on the subject.

I think imperial college London are currently doing a study on micro dosing. Maybe he should offer himself up as a lab rab.
I think I would have just pretended not to know what it was. I wouldn't be opening my 18 year olds post over a micro dose.

Oooh does sound like microdosing psilocybin - theres some good info out there that microdosing helps cure depression.

However... its your house not his, whilst he lives at your house he'd need your agreement to try such things. So he'll have to wait until he has his own house won't he.

Fgs!!! This is a nootropic, NOT ILLEGAL I use nootropics every day to treat adhd.

This is likely ordered from Etsy (I get lots of mine from here too) and it cannot and will not be illegal substances. Unless he’s buying from the dark web which I highly doubt.

I do think however... if you hit the roof and don't listen to him, theres a good chance he is going to simply not talk to you, and if he is suffering depression and wanting to address that... thats hardly a good thing to do to your relationship with him.

He might not just be a customer. That block might be resin to divide up and sell.
Dealing is a serious crime.
You need to have a big talk with him, OP.

Mushroom chocolate is a bit of a thing on 'the scene' in London currently. Could it be this?

One of my siblings did this - but with something a bit stronger.... My dad threw it on the fire. I doubt that drug dealers would descend on your house but the police might! My brother's package came from overseas and could easily have been flagged by customs, and let through so they could track where it went. You then might find yourself having an awkward conversation with them about being in possession of drugs. It probably depends on what it is and how much as to whether they would bother but why take the risk? Just idiotic.

I would tell a white lie and say the package was ripped, you could see what it was, and you disposed of it in case it had been tracked.

He'll probably be furious (as was my brother!) but it's your house. Let him find his own place and have his ridiculous stuff sent there instead 🙄

You have literally taken this out of your safeguarding children PowerPoint presentation
😂bless ya.

Firstly, don't worry. More than likely, it's a little bit of cannabis chocolate which is hardly the same as him receiving ounces of Colombia's finest.

Honestly, I'd be pretty hands off anyway, it's not really that different than me having a couple of glasses of wine. If you're uncomfortable with it being in the house then make that clear to him (but maybe not by admitting you're going through his post, just a more generic talk about drugs). Obviously, if it starts having a massive effect on his behaviour, that's different but teenagers trying stuff like alcohol and weed isn't some earth-shattering event.

Shroom chocolate? Back in the day you had to eat the whole thing 🤮

Just seen what it likely is - not as serious as my brother's 'delivery' 😅Is it actually legal? I have no idea. If it is, I would probably try to have a gentle chat about why he feels he needs it etc. If not, my previous comment applies.

Good advice, thanks. I’m not one to hit the roof but I am concerned for him bc he has such an extreme personality. Most my friends were on one thing or another when I was young so it’s more my knowledge of his personality that makes me concerned. Anyway thanks for all the points of view, it’s helping me get perspective.

Can I just say this thread has given me a much needed giggle this evening.

OP - just put the package in his room and move on. It's really, really not a big deal. If you can buy it on Etsy it's not going to be top grade crack in there. As a PP has said, it's probably not even illegal.

However, he should get a job so he can spend his own money on this stuff, not yours. He's an adult now, even if he's still in school.

Can you take a photo of the specific product you've received to your address OP? Just so we, as parents, know what to watch out for.

Chocolate that's got a minimal amount of nothing in it, I bet. It's very very mild, compared to some stuff he could try as a first timer. He's 18. It's not that bad.

Yes it’s 100% legal!

All this fuss and nonsense for nothing!

Please don’t cut his allowance op. He’s actively trying to treat his SEN, perhaps not in the way you’re used to but it’s nothing harmful. It’s likely wolsfsbane mushroom.

Sorry mean Lionsbane mushroom, wolfsblane is poisonous and in Harry Potter 🤣

Just watching HP as it happens 😂

Ok all this is reassuring and has helped, thanks.