Appropriate bedtime for an 11/12 year old (year 7)

[Unhappymumma]

My son (as many others do too) is pushing back at us about his bedtime. We ask him to come off devices at 9.30 and asleep at 10 pm a school night which I think a good time.
To give him his due, all of the boys he plays with online stay on much longer and he is always the first to come off. He's telling me they are allowed to stay up until 11.30/midnight on a school night!!!
Now this will not be happening in our house regardless, but I've told him I'm going to ask other parents as according to him we are mean, strict, boring, and are the only ones doing this.
I would like to show him the responses. Thank you 😁

Our son same age as yours is off all devices, TV etc by 8.30/8.45 - he then reads for a bit and in bed by 9.15pm

I'm pulling my Dc1 yr7 back to an earlier bedtime after some Xmas late nights. It's 8pm to bed, read til 9pm then lights out. My Dc2 is primary aged so easier to implement for both.

I won't pretend Dc1 is happy about this

Our nearly 11 year old is off devices by 7 and in bed by 9. Can read / draw in bed until 9:30

Devices off by 9. Asleep 9.30. I'd rather it was half hour earlier but she has
always been night owl.

11 year old usually in bed between 8-830. Usually asleep by 9 and up at 7am. Weekends bed by 9ish and up about 10!! They love their sleep.

DD is 12 and an owl. Screen time ends at 8:30pm and she is in bed by 10pm.

Ds 11 yr 6. Not generally allowed gaming after tea, he goes up to bed about 845, shower etc then he’s allowed to watch tv in his room until 930/945 after which it’s sleeping or reading. He’s usually asleep by 1030.

I think they need about 10 hours! Mine definitely does

My nearly 11 year old goes up at 8:30 and reads till 9. Off all gadgets by 7:30 though otherwise he doesn’t relax and is a bum head.

Dd11 bed 10pm then reads then talks then.... I was so much stricter with the older ones 🤦‍♀️

11 year old DD and 14 year old DS both off devices by 7pm.

However we do sometimes watch tv together later on.

11 year old in bed by 8.30pm, 14 year old in bed by 9.30 / 10pm.

They can read for a bit before lights out, not strict about it, but no devices in bedroom.

10pm lights out for my Y7 DC.
10:30 on a weekend.

12/yr8

bed 9pm school nights. 9.30pm weekend.

though we aren’t super strict about exact time.

Send DD11 up at 8.30 and she fanny’s about for half an hour and I’m lucky if she’s in bed by 9 - 9.15.

A child of that age should be getting 9 to 10 hours. If they are up at 7am, they need to be asleep sometime between 9pm & 10pm, adjust if they get up earlier but do not adjust if they get up later.

8pm for a high school dc? Mine have been arriving home from clubs at that time from around age 7 so aren't asleep til 9 ish. Lots of older kids on similar schedules- how do you fit everything in?

Dd almost year 7 almost 12. Off devices and into bed for 8.30. She can read and often tuns her light out at 9 - her choice. She gets up at 6.30 for school and is usually up early at the weekend around 7-7.30.

DS - Y6 - up to bed around 8.15 and off devices to read and then asleep by 8.30/8.45.

It does help he shares with younger brother but he definitely needs an earlier sleep as he wakes at 6am 😴

Ds1(12) is upstairs by 8.30, lights off around 9. He's usually asleep by 9.30 and up at 6 which is a good amount of sleep I think.

Off devices by 9 pm in this house; in bed by 10 for all on a school night (oldest is 15). Devices downstairs. Anyone not sleepy can read. When in Y7 we aimed for off devices by 8pm and upstairs by 9.

Thank you. I think we are pretty lenient that he's in bed at 10.he probably doesn't go to sleep until half past. He can stay up later on weekends & holidays.
I just want him to understand that not everyone stays up late, even though it seems his circle of friends do. It really doesn't help the situation when his best mate doesn't even have his tea until 9 and goes to bed 11/12!!!!!!

My 11 yr old is screens off and upstairs shortly after 8. Usually in bed for 8.30. I don't monitor what time his lights go off - but I don't think it's much past 9.

I've one of those incredibly well behaved girls for my second child. So, this is all her own routine, nothing to do with me.
She leaves her phone downstairs and goes up at 7.30, does her shower/face wash routine stuff that she's in to, I go up at 8 and we lay in her bed and read together till 8.30, then listen to classical music until 8.40. I'm writing thinking people might think I'm taking the piss like 'my child only eats kale and lentils' but it's true!

My DS age 11 (Y7) is In bed for sleeping at 10pm and normally asleep within half an hour at the latest. Gets 9 solid hours sleep every night without fail.