Son has spent all his birthday money on fried chicken and doughnuts

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My 13yo confessed earlier that he's been taking his bank card out each day and has been buying sweets, drinks, fried chicken etc for him and his friends for the last few weeks. Only today he ran out of money.
He's spent about £150. We had no idea.
I thought DH would be really cross when I told him, but he just sighed and said that it's a lesson he needed to learn.
I had no clue he was even taking his bank card out. He's only had it a couple of months so was clearly giddy on his riches. Idiot!

Please tell me that other kids have done this? Im a mixture of cross, sad for him, and quite bemused right now.

Best to learn this lesson at 13 than when he's older. When it's gone it's gone.

@BigsyMalone I really need to try it

I don’t see the issue unless he’s overweight?

In 2021 my ds 17 spent 2k on take aways.

Who gives their 13 ysar old a bank card?

😮

Lots of people give their 13 year olds bank cards*. That’s how they gradually learn to budget and hopefully not to be (too) silly with their money. Important to do that before they hit majority, when the stakes are much higher.

*specific ones for minors.

Anybody who wants their child to learn about running a bank account but doesn't want to pay a monthly fee for a Go Henry type card. What age do you think is suitable for a bank card?

I opened a savings account in my own banking app with 'X child savings' as its title so it's clear to me it's completely separate.
Then I transfer an agreed amount into their personal account each week/ month.

I give my bank details to family wishing to give the child money.

This way I can control limits on spending. It's a generous sensible limit.

Once they are earning it's up to them how they spend earnings.

We've had an occasional spend it all spree, but nothing outrageous.

DC was older (ASD/ADHD) but blew nearly £500 in around a month when he discovered how much he had in a bank account. It was years worth of little bits of birthday/Christmas money we had had put in there.
I’m still so disappointed. He keeps asking how much is in his child trust fund. I keep telling him it’s for a car or towards house deposit one day, I’ve been paying into that monthly for years, so he’s not getting his hands on that so easily.

What a horrible post, why is it the friends fault, for goodness sake.

My dd had just over 5k in her bank account once she turned 18 (compensation money)

she blew the lot within two and a half months and all she seemed to have to show for it was some belly piecing jewellery and 3 bras

it really annoyed me at the time (but it was her money and she was technically an adult)

she massively regrets it now

Most people! (Or at least a Revolut card which is what my teens have).

Much the easiest way to manage money, and you can add / takeaway money from their accounts + set limits / tasks. It's great.

@WednesdayFridayAddams Unfortunately the government will hand over his Child Trust Fund to him at 18 despite the cash within having been put there by you.

OP I wouldn't be as sanguine as many other posters.

I am a single parent, 3 DC, and while I have a good job, thanks to useless ex, money is v tight. I'd be so disappointed if money was wasted like this.

However; I'm usually clear with DC what their money is to be used for eg some for saving, some for practical items like clothes, and then they can decide what they want to do with the rest.

I think you need to talk through your expectations around money with him.

I can confidently say at 15 I would’ve spent that money on drugs, so I’m a bit that all it’s gone on is KFC. Honestly you all need to calm down.

@EarringsandLipstick but it’s his money and it will be a lesson learned when he wants something bigger but doesn’t have the cash for it.

I did the same at 18 with £1000.
i am horrified at my silly 18 year old self.

He'll probably always remember the time he had lots of money to spend on him and his friends. If he's happy and has no regrets, it's not an issue. It seems unlikely it will be reciprocated though!

My daughters card sends me notifications every time she spends, so I can keep a check and block if she's spending too much!

Bit worrying that’s he’s maybe been buying friendship and they won’t stick around now he’s spent up 😢

but get. His money and it’s gone. At least it wasn’t drugs or diamond white.

breathe and have a chat.

what does he think you should do about any money he gets for Xmas - just reflect on what he bought - was it “ value “ if so how ? And would he do it again / what would he really want to spend his money on and how is he going to work it out - an allowance per week ? And who “ police’s “ that - will you give it out or be restrain himself this time ? Would he just buy the one “ big ticket item instead.

It’s learning money

sounds like he got a lot of enjoyment out of it

about Bubble Tea, it is amazing. A low sugar matcha tea latte with crème brûlée topping and brown sugar poppers is heaven in a cup! And only about £7 🤪 and only 800 cals 🤯 But I honestly love it, it’s my weekly treat at MooBoo (me and all the teens in town)

Lol my teens dream. Least he shared. Sounds like he won’t do it again.

Mine did this, well spent hundreds on supermarket meal deals, in addition to school cafeteria lunches. A bunch of them were getting supermarket meal deals every day before the bus home. I guess hungry teenage boys couldn’t wait until dinner🙄 I ended up topping it up as couldn’t easily argue with kid being hungry and lunch was a few hours earlier.

not a fan of bubble tea though! I think those jelly things are tapioca?