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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Is your teen 'a gangsta from the hood'?!?!

253 replies

Robertsmithdoesmyhair · 30/05/2019 16:36

My 14 year old son speaks in rap and I have no clue what he is talking about most of the time. Lots of 'blud' 'bruva' and sucking his teeth. Funnily enough, he is neither from the hood nor a gangsta and we are a fairly normal family! We don't live in The Bronx and we don't wear soverign rings!
When oh when will he return to normal? Anyone else's teen doing this? Confused

OP posts:
Diamondbean · 30/05/2019 22:45

My 7 year old daughter over heard a group of 13-15 year old lads talking at the bus stop a few weeks back.
“Trust me blud, can tell he ent a (area) mans.”

She proceeded to say, loudly:
“Mom, how can you trust someone’s blood? And isn’t the plural of man men? I’m in year 2 and I know that how do they not know.”

The lads actually laughed at the one who said it, and walked off even though they were waiting for the bus.

I’m sure it’ll be a phase just the same as any other phase growing up!

tredly · 30/05/2019 22:48

Everyone is embarrassed at their kids doing 'gangsta' but you think your 11 yr old DD talking in patois in your white village is showing an understanding of black history/culture? I'm actually cringing for you and your DD, probably most people that know you are too.
Have a word with her, she's not black and never will be.

^^
@TheLastNigel
Are you also aware that your dd "acting cultural" is actual doing more harm than good to ethnic minorities such as blsck prople?

tredly · 30/05/2019 22:48

Black even

aIways · 30/05/2019 22:53

From somebody who grew up around plenty of (real) 'roadmen' and general thugs and hoodlums, and now a few years later, am a reformed mother and MN user - this thread is amazing! Grin

Still let the odd 'sick' slip out at work though Blush trying to replace it with fab!

pikapikachu · 30/05/2019 22:55

What I did was to start talking like a road man until my kids begged me to stop. (Couple of meals iirc?) I'm not bothered how they talk to their friends but I get Normal speech with the odd word like fam thrown in which is acceptable to me.

Robertsmithdoesmyhair · 30/05/2019 22:55

True bruv true!
I found my people innit.
Wagwan and good night! Grin

OP posts:
DuchessSybilVimes · 30/05/2019 22:55

Urgh I hate this. As a teacher I've seen it a lot. A withering "you are so white you're translucent, please stop embarrassing yourself" usually works.

Papergirl1968 · 30/05/2019 23:00

Genuine question here. When white people want a tan, is that offensive too?
Or how about when they want to die their hair darker?
There’s clearly confusion over what’s ok and what isn’t, and offence being taken where none is meant.

pikapikachu · 30/05/2019 23:04

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/newsbeat-46427180

I realise that thelastnige's dd isn't blackfishing btw but had to reply to people who mistakenly think that blackfishing is not a bad thing.

It's a common complain on FWR that Transwomen get the "good" bits of being a woman but not not "bad" and blackfishing is the same and not complimentary.

Knackeredmommy · 30/05/2019 23:07

Well! I'm black and don't consider anything described here as 'black culture'. I have a teenage son who is into Stormzy and chats to his friends in teen talk, they're from a range of ethnicities. He doesn't talk to me like that! And I can't bare bloody grime music.
It's popular 'urban' culture and kids want to fit in! Chill.

Papergirl1968 · 30/05/2019 23:10

Dye, ffs, dye! Not die Blush

TokyoSushi · 30/05/2019 23:11

DS insists on calling me 'bro' - he's 7

Anybody who met me/us would probably describe us as 'naice'

GrinGrinGrin

tredly · 30/05/2019 23:14

@Papergirl1968 since when was dark hair limited to ethnic minorities?

100percentplease · 30/05/2019 23:16

We don’t have this in Scotland it would appear because I’ve never heard anyone speak like this Grin

Wtf is a roadman? I’m picturing the men in hi-vis who seem to do a lot of sitting around in vans whenever there’s roadworks on ha!

ballsdeep · 30/05/2019 23:18

Nigel I can't see anything wrong with your post. Some people jump of everything. Every single post on this thread is about teenagers pretending to be something they are not. Nigel mentions it and all of a sudden posters are down her throat.

Blankscreen · 30/05/2019 23:18

Yes we call dss 15 the Surrey Gangster 😁.he lives and has always lived in a very nice part of Surrey.

We hear the following peng tings, boi, wha-gwan (what's going on) and other shit they pick up from u tube and grime music.

tredly · 30/05/2019 23:22

*@ballsdeep *
She is white but she longs to be black as being white is 'boring'.

If you can't see anything wrong with that I can only presume you have no experience of cultural appropriation.

user1461609321 · 30/05/2019 23:22

Can I just add that as a black person, I do not accept slag speech, violence etc 'as being solely relevant to my culture'.

In fact I find it offensive that the 'road man' persona, being 'ghetto' etc is all considered to be a ' black thing' that we must ironically laugh about and remind little Johnny that he is not.

There are many university educated, property owning middle class black people out there, who would be equally horrified to hear their child behaving in a chav like/ hill billy way!

It's like a black person creating a humorous thread saying , 'my darling daughter is pretending to be so white trash, pregnant at 14 with a man who is always drunk lol.

She is always outside smoking, and swearing, wearing clothes too small for herself and shouting at her 2 year old in the street who binges on tv and mc Donald's lol

Then making negative generalisations about white culture but cleverly juxtaposing this with positive aspects of black culture eg 'she however forgets that we are a close knit, church going family, all university educated and that she herself grew up on home cooked meals lol (aren't I hilarious)

This thread has very racist undertones about what it means to be black, it is clear that the media has succeeded in portraying black people so negatively that ordinary people can not see beyond this.

Not every black person is 'street'

Not all Muslims are the Taliban

Not all white people are racist chavs

How do we expect our young black youth to have a positive sense of self when the grown ups (including all those teachers having to remind the Sylvester's of the world, that thankfully they are white so can stop being silly).

It is the prerogative of teens to form alternative identities to their parents, whether by speaking differently, finding a cause to fight etc as they discover their sense of self

SpanishTiles · 30/05/2019 23:23

Nigel your dd isn't called Rachel Dolezal is she?

Papergirl1968 · 30/05/2019 23:29

It isn’t Tredly but are white people who choose to make their hair darker rather than lighter, and to get a summer tan, causing offence? At which point does it become blackfishing, like in that link above?

Knackeredmommy · 30/05/2019 23:29

Exactly @user1461609321.

user1461609321 · 30/05/2019 23:30

Thank you Halo

Ohyesiam · 30/05/2019 23:32

Mine does this "ironically"
I’ve got one of those, she calls me and says
“ yo G”, because apparently I’m a gangsta too?
Her school is full of white boys speaking patois, they used to be wannabe yardies in my day, now they are called “ road men” They still do the same special walk thing though.
And all this in rural Somerset, Fam.

TheLastNigel · 30/05/2019 23:37

No I don't think she's showing an understanding of black culture or history by talking 'black' in our white village anymore than any of the other kids described on this thread.
I do think she thinks it's aspirational to be black. Not because it's aspirational to suffer the effects of racism as so many Black people have, and not to be dismissive of that in any way-she finds examples of racism through history (and current) hard to understand and horrific because she can't get her 11 year old head around why white people have acted that way-it's so far from the way she thinks.
Rather She just finds that the celebrities she admires and the music she likes are often black or of black origin and naturally as kids do, wants to imitate the singers and actors she likes. (She also likes some white singers and actors-she isn't exclusively seeking out only BME cultural reference points but I'm not going to encourage her to stop admiring black celebrities if that's what she wants to do and that is her current bias).

-Would you genuinely prefer she think the opposite? That being black is not a good thing and never can be because of the years of oppression black people have faced?

Thanks for labelling my 11 year old 'creepy' though...because she talks with an accent that, as described on this thread, lots of kids seem to be adopting for whatever reason and because she has expressed admiration for the way Afro hair looks....
I'll go and tell her she must only speak with RP pronunciation because anything else is 'wrong' and that the only desirable hair is long, straight and blonde like her own. Because that attitude, as expressed by many white people over the centuries has been brilliant for race relations....

Im not sure where I said that she 'thinks she will be black'. Im fairly sure she's aware she never will be so I won't be 'having a word with her', but thanks.

Oshe · 30/05/2019 23:39

It's like a black person creating a humorous thread saying , 'my darling daughter is pretending to be so white trash, pregnant at 14 with a man who is always drunk lol.

Completely agree with this.

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