Is your teen 'a gangsta from the hood'?!?!

[Robertsmithdoesmyhair]

My 14 year old son speaks in rap and I have no clue what he is talking about most of the time. Lots of 'blud' 'bruva' and sucking his teeth. Funnily enough, he is neither from the hood nor a gangsta and we are a fairly normal family! We don't live in The Bronx and we don't wear soverign rings!
When oh when will he return to normal? Anyone else's teen doing this?

My son seems to have lost the ability to speak in complete and coherent sentences. Instead of asking a friend 'are you going to the shop?', he'll ask 'you going shop?'
It drives me crazy and he sounds absolutely ridiculous.

There are advantages to having an autistic son. He hates popular culture (except gaming!) and rarely comes out with these phrases. The teens at work do though and I often use them just for the reaction! However, the teens at work, and my teens, all hate the roadmen and think they are pathetic drug dealers! Hopefully that lasts!

I'd say the concept of cultural misappropriation doesn't apply in this case. She admires black people and black culture and sees it as nothing but positive. I'd far sooner she take an interest in other cultures and learn about any aspects of them she finds interesting-particularly as she lives in a spectacularly homogenous white area.
Or would we all be better staying in our own cultural lanes and never attempting any meeting of ways at all? That doesn't seem a pathway to a coherent society to me.

I've got a friend that is Jewish and as such I've learned lots about her religion and culture-because I admire it and I'm interested in it, and because I want to be a better, more aware friend to her. Is that cultural misappropriation? Or just an interest in another culture? Am I in some way anti Semitic because I've learned to cook some Jewish food?

DD is aware of racism-she knows about the slave trade and the centuries of oppression black people have faced. But I don't expect her to solely focus on that and never then express an interest in other aspects of black culture because she is white and therefore in some way indirectly responsible. What's actually wrong with looking forward at the same time as acknowledging the wrongs of history and encouraging a bit of cultural cross over? Surely that's the only way to shrink divisions in society?

I don't find anything negative in kids acting culturally in ways that aren't their own by birth and I fail to see why any one would really...

My two DDs are like proper peng tings fam. Everything revolves around how many likes they got on their recents. They hate it when DH and I walk around Asda saying ‘ooh look at that cake/potato/washing up sponge, that’s a proper peng ting’

Why the interest in Afro hair? She likes the look of Afro hair and became interested in how it should be cared for-possibly triggered by a black friend of mine talking about the wigs she sometimes has and how she had to put a lot of work into her natural hair 🤷🏽‍♀️.

Should I have told her to stop looking at images of Afro hair then? What reason should I have given for saying that? That's it's racist to look at a hair type that's different to yours and offensive because of years of racism perpetuated by your vile forebears?

I used to teach in a PRU. The kids there used to talk about being 'roadmen'. I didn't understand what it was (being a middle class swot turned teacher) but sadly some of those kids probably will end up as 'roadmen' and lead a shitty and violent life as a result. Be grateful that your embarrassing home counties kids have a good chance of growing out of that nonsense and becoming half decent, boring law abiding citizens!

No but i teach some year 3 children who have taken to calling their little friendship the bruvvas. Parents are pretty mortified

Ahh yes. Not the Sarf London/Jamaican patois, but kids at our school went through a gangsta phase. Much like the above poster, I loved reminding them that no, you are not the love child of Snoop Dogg and Fiddy, who originates from South Central LA, but a very white kid from a small northern market town. Cue much "omg, what do you know?" To which I told them my sons fiancé actually was from SCLA, gun fire isn't cool and glamorous and that they last 2 minutes in a school there.

All the kids described on this thread that are speaking in the way the Op describes are acting in ways that's aren't culturally their own Tedly. That's why the parents find it odd. Are they all being offensive too?

They aren't doing it in a piss takey way though are they? They are doing it because it's seen as something aspirational. Which is surely the opposite of being offensive?

Your description of your dd made me smile, Nigel. [Grin]
Sone people have not only had a sense of humour bypass, but are offended by everything (sigh)...

Why is Nigel's dd being singled out for language and an interest when everyone is sharing stories of their testy teens?

Twatty not testy

ooh look at that cake/potato/washing up sponge, that’s a proper peng ting

Not my own, but I've hired a neighbour's 14 yo to help me mow the lawn, do some weeding etc and tbh listening to her on her phone to her friends, as opposed to how she grunts talks to me, is the absolute highlight of my weekend. Followed closely by my toddler shouting "Abba! Abba!" when she switches on some grime.

I don't find anything negative in kids acting culturally in ways that aren't their own by birth and I fail to see why any one would really...

It's always incredibly convenient when white people fail to understand why minorities would be offended by appropriation simply because they aren't 🤨

I'm not saying remotely your daughter can't be interested in grime music or aspects of popular culture associated with black groups... but you initially said she finds it boring to be white and your second comment was about her googling Afro hair. These are not reasons to appreciate a culture....

I'm also not saying as a white person you can't appreciate different cultures but there is a lot of sensitivity around white culture adopting black/Asian traditions and announcing that they are now "cool" and "in-trend" when for years people were persecuted and discriminated against for these very things. Think girls wearing bindis at festivals, cornrows and dreadlocks, "natural" Afro hair - black people have been fired from jobs for having their natural hair.... it's not the latest fad!

Hopefully when she's a bit older and moves away from home she will have the chance to meet people from different racial groups and her perspectives might change.

I appreciate she is 11 but this is a much larger issue.

As a black person I don't find any of the behaviour described funny or endearing. Your daughter in particular @TheLastNigel sounds quite creepy.

My 8 year old says 'yeet' a lot. Should I be worried?

My 13 year old DS has just shown me on his phone a giant diamond blingy sovereign ring he wants......I'm all for kids been allowed to express themselves through fashion and all that crap but I'm drawing the line at this one!
I get lots of 'yeah, bro"'s as well.

Sone people have not only had a sense of humour bypass, but are offended by everything (sigh)...

Yes it's really funny when my black DH gets stopped by the police on his lunch break because he fits a profile of someone suspected of drug dealing. Or he gets called a jungle bunny or a monkey.

If only I wasn't so easily offended and I could go back to raving about how "totally sick" black culture is before going home to my 5 bedroom house in Hampshire

That’s awful, Red.
But it’s not me, Nigel or Nigel's dd doing or saying those things.
Shane a lighthearted thread has been derailed.

None of my teens every spoke like this ( thank god ) & we live in London.

@thelastnigel
Everyone is embarrassed at their kids doing 'gangsta' but you think your 11 yr old DD talking in patois in your white village is showing an understanding of black history/culture? I'm actually cringing for you and your DD, probably most people that know you are too.
Have a word with her, she's not black and never will be.

DD is aware of racism-she knows about the slave trade and the centuries of oppression black people have faced.

Ah so she understands how offensive it is to pretend to be oppressed because it's 'cool'?

I wonder will she still pretend when she gets racially abused & pulled over by police.
Is she aware of black face?

I don't find anything negative in kids acting culturally in ways that aren't their own by birth and I fail to see why any one would really...

'Acting culturally' what exactly do you think acting culturally is? Do you think a white person 'acting black' is respectful?

Are black people and their culture literally just a costume of slang and afro hair for your DD to wear whenever she pleases also fucking offensive that your daughter seems to think speaking in a certain accent or trying to speak 'rough' or whatever makes her closer to a black person🙄

Wagwan G !! 😂😂😂

It would be great if all the kids who love "black culture" could be as passionate about increasing black representation in politics, challenging racial bias, breaking down negative stereotypes of black men as thuggish and aggressive and be allies to causes like Black Lives Matter rather than just wishing they had afros, listening to hip hop and saying wag1 my g.