Do you take your teenagers phone away at night?

[sweetkitty]

That’s it really, we take DD1s (14.9yo) and DD2s (13.3yo) phone away at night. DD2 is fine with it but DD1 moans every night. she tries to sneak it back, steals her brothers iPad and stashed it in her room etc. Bedtime is 10pm on a school night and she gets up until then. If we didn’t take it away she would be on it all night.

Apparently we are the only parents in the world to do this and all her friends are up chatting all night and she misses out (they are she gets messages at 2-3am) how can they function for school in the morning I do not know?

No I don't. My younger one will go to sleep on my command at 1030 (he slept through from 3 weeks though so loves his zzz) my eldest has learnt to self regulate via natural consequences, as in being exhausted and struggling to get up. Before anyone has me down as smug or progressive he has ASD and likely PDA so I didn't always parent asI would have liked to. He's a dream now!

@Underoverunder
I totally disagree my 16 year old is very close to being an adult, he can drive in November, he has a girlfriend, he is making choices for his future - what college, what a’levels.
He will have a part time job when his exams finish in June..... that’s a 16year old who can self regulate and chose when to use their phone or not!

We all put our phones on charge in the kitchen at night, never really given it much thought. Dd 16 & dd 15

Underoverunder
I dont do that either.🤷🏻‍♀️
He is 16 not a toddler

DTs 15, phones are plugged in downstairs from 9.30, as are ours

I am told off by my DD every night when I take her from her. She is 14, I’m the only one who does this, all her friends will think she is a baby etc etc. She has it until 1030 on a school night but allowed it on a Friday and Saturday.
Constant battle 😬

My 16 and 18 year olds keep their phones but 12 year old has to hand it to me on school nights (Monday to Thursday plus Sunday night) 16 year old is excellent at putting phone on do not disturb and getting up on time in the morning without prompting so has been allowed to charge phone in her room from 12/13 ish? She's asleep before 10pm where as the youngest would stay up until midnight and struggle in the morning if he had his phone.

Mine and dhs phones are left downstairs on charge. The kids have their phones and iPads on charge on the landing as they like to go on them in bed before they get up for the day.

Don’t understand the need for them in a bedroom.

No I don't. DS1 is 15, he knows I'd not be happy at all if he was on his phone past bedtime. I regularly go upstairs 10/15 mins after he's gone to bed and he's always asleep, and I often go in to wake him in the morning and have a quick look at his phone screen. There's usually several notifications going back to the previous night, so I'm convinced he doesn't use it at all.

He knows if this changes though I'd take it away. He loves his sleep too much to waste time on his phone!

I don't blame you at all, apart from a bit of me says let them find out the hard way.

No phones or electronics at night time in the bedrooms. It is a rule for everyone in the house, also non while we are eating on the table.

Yep. 14 year old every night, 16 year old keeps his Fri and Sat.

Thanks for all the replies I was even on FB today (fame). I was also in a MN book after posting a baby tip! (Funnily enough that baby is now the 14 year old in question)

I just don’t know how these teenagers are getting enough sleep staying up all night on phones. Another reason is if she stays up she clatters about and makes no effort to be quiet, often waking DH and I up (DH gets up for work at 5am) so is in bed by 10pm most nights like the elder two.

A big thank you to all the parents who do this.

Phones are like crack cocaine for teens. A lot of kids at our school are on them practically all night and are shattered during the day. Some also accessing very unpleasant sites alone in the dark and exposing themselves to some pretty horrific stuff (especially lots of graphic self harm sites).

I used to but stopped at 15.

A big thank you to all the parents who do this.

Phones are like crack cocaine for teens. A lot of kids at our school are on them practically all night and are shattered during the day

No thank you to the parents who don’t do it but their DC still sleep at night 🤷🏻‍♀️

@trickyex we bought a charger thing off amazon that has 4 USB ports in it, I can't think what the actual name is but it's fab just plugs into one socket & we can charge all phones & iPad etc on it

Teller thank you for that, sounds ideal for us, will have a look.

Yes we do. Dd13 hands it over at 8pm. Dd16 8.30pm and Dd17 10pm.

Enforcing it as we speak. The face on my 14 year old DS!

How do you block apps on their phones after a set time please?

I have used BT parental controls to block filth and Facebook from 11pm. But they can use mobile data to get round this.
Taken all electricals off as punishment but no success in all out rooms by a set time yet.

Ds(13) leaves his phone on charge in the kitchen when he goes to bed - too tempting to stay up late on it if it's in his room and he needs a decent nights sleep.

No. I've never done that even when they were younger. Certainly not when they're nearly at GCSE stage. They need to be able to self regulate. I believe that if you treat them like babies then they'll act like babies.

Both DC use their phones as alarms, as do I, at the other side of the room. If they complain about being tired I suggest an earlier night which they agree with.