Do you take your teenagers phone away at night?

[sweetkitty]

That’s it really, we take DD1s (14.9yo) and DD2s (13.3yo) phone away at night. DD2 is fine with it but DD1 moans every night. she tries to sneak it back, steals her brothers iPad and stashed it in her room etc. Bedtime is 10pm on a school night and she gets up until then. If we didn’t take it away she would be on it all night.

Apparently we are the only parents in the world to do this and all her friends are up chatting all night and she misses out (they are she gets messages at 2-3am) how can they function for school in the morning I do not know?

Yes. Phone in my room overnight so no sneaking on it when I’m asleep!

He comes off all screen stuff at 8pm (in theory, but closer to half past as I let him finish the game or whatever he's on).

I say all screen stuff but don’t mean tv. We've only got 1 in the living room so he can come watch in there with everyone else.

DDs phone locks at 10:30pm. She can have it where she likes but it doesn't work until 5:30am.

DS1 16 and DS2 13 charge their phones in their rooms (opposite end to bed). They've been told we will do spot checks (partial glass door ) and the first time the phone isn't in the charger after lights out they've lost it from then on. No issues so far.

We do a no school rend for about an hour before bed, but dd14 does lots of evening activities so she’s allowed to go her streaks( snapchat?) when she gets in before bed. Then we have the phones and iPads downstairs.
I don’t want to judge or stereotype, but when I look to see if it’s charged before I go to bed, the messages popping up late in the evening at church e from kids that I think of as under parented. So no op it’s not just you.

At church?
Are from

DD1 is 13.9753 years old and I don't take away her phone at night. She's very sensible with it. If/when she goes through stages of taking the piss, I then remove it until she proves she can be responsible.

All phones charging downstairs, DS 15 & DD 11, at weekends no phones in the morning unless some homework is done, the earlier they get on with homework, the earlier the phone!

You are not the only person to take the phones off them at night. I do exactly the same thing.

We do this too for almost 15 year old. Was 10pm but we agreed it could be kept for listening to music until 10.30pm (yeah right).

We plod along like this and every so often have a ding dong where we are told we are "mean" and "stopping me from sleeping" and "don't you trust me" etc etc for taking it away.

My fave argument is that it's much easier to sleep with the phone than without. Obviously music is needed for sleep and obviously it HAS to be spotify not old ipod or radio and it HAS to be on the phone only so by removing the phone we are responsible for the lack of sleep. Gotta love that teenage logic.

Yes. Dds 16 and 13. They hand them in by 9 on school nights and before bed on weekends which could be 10 - 10.30.

They still need sleep and to function at the weekends for homework and sports. I sometimes WhatsApp research to them about the harms of too little sleep to reinforce I'm not doing it just to be mean.

No - I never did this.

I think by 16 they should have learnt self regulation to be honest. We used to however once in year 10 we decided to allow him so that he took some responsibly. If he’s on it all night he suffers the next day by being shattered, If we can’t let our kids learn this then blooming heck the world of adulthood is just around the corner?!!!

He sets his alarm to wake himself up, heads to sleep about 11ish, if he goes on it at night then so be it he will be tired. He’s on course to do extremely well in GCSEs and has done in mocks so so far he’s regulating himself v well!

No dcs phones allowed in bedrooms at all which solves the overnight problems too😁

Yr7 dd has to put it plugged in on the landing by 830. As someone else said the messages are still rolling in way into the early hours 2-3am on school nights. From a few kids not all
This is confirmation of my guesses on some of the new high school friends that appear to have very little parenting going on.

I've never taken my sons away he's 16 and in year 11.
I can't imagine telling a nearly adult to leave it downstairs.

Yes I ask for my DSs phones at night, around 9.30 for DS1 (14) and 9 for DS2 (11).
It causes some grumbling but to hell with that.
I am getting more sockets put in the kitchen and will keep mine charging in there too. Seems only fair and its healthier to sleep minus phones for us all.
So you arent alone OP!

I work with teenagers and I wish more parents would do this.

As a teacher I could easily tell which students had been on their phones all night. It really shows in their results and how happy they appear to be.

Pristine Condition Year 11 is still quite far off being an adult.

Presumably you have no issues with telling your son to go to school each day or to do his homework.

Yes 8 for dd (12) 9 for ds (15)

We have always done this, and will continue to do this until they are an adult and can understand the huge negative impact on their lives, sleep, education and peace of mind. I have zero qualms about doing this. Everyone I know does this, with one or two exceptions (with very obvious consequences)

dc 14 (nearly 15) and 11

DS (14) has to give us his phone about 9pm & we charge it in our room. I wouldn’t trust him not to be on it all night. We’ve always done this so he accepts it usually!

I agree with Shanghai Diva. If they can’t self regulate, I will regulate for them.

It’s all very well for the parents of self disciplined children to be boggling over the idea of intervening for older teens, but the fact is that phones and social media are very addictive, so some of us need to help our kids navigate it.

I generally insist phoned be charged in the living room at bedtime. There was whinging to start with but now it’s routine. We have decided as a family that there is still too much screen time so we have installed a blocking app. It’s helping.

No I don't. I trust her. She puts her phone on charge on her room and is usually sparked out by 10.15. She's 15 and has to get up at before 7am for school so she's pretty sensible during the week.

Friday and Saturday she can and often does stay up late on her phone.