Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

At what age are you happy for teen girls to have a sleepover without an adult in the house?

29 replies

FelicityPorcine · 28/02/2019 19:42

Just girls, no boys. One of the girls’ parents lives 5 mins walk away.

Unchartered territory here so would be interested to hear others’ experiences. Thanks.

OP posts:
junebirthdaygirl · 28/02/2019 19:55

I would say 17. Definitely wouldn't do it before that. Would have no problem with being out for a while in the night and come back later.

thelonggame · 28/02/2019 20:03

Totally depends on the girls and the girls they are friends with. My oldest DD I would have trusted her at 16, my youngest I wouldn't have until she was 18 and had a better group of friends!!

StrumpersPlunkett · 28/02/2019 20:05

16+

cocomelon23 · 28/02/2019 20:13

I would say 17 or older maybe.

Original poster
FelicityPorcine · 28/02/2019 20:20

Girls are relatively sensible - although two girls I don’t know. They are 15 and 16yr olds. i’m just not sure.

OP posts:
Wallywobbles · 28/02/2019 21:29

How can you know that there won't be lads dropping round?

MajesticWhine · 28/02/2019 21:49

If you want them to invite their boyfriends around and lose their virginity - then about aged 15. (Speaking from experience)

Original poster
FelicityPorcine · 28/02/2019 22:24

As far as I know only one of them has a boyfriend so I don’t think that is an issue - they are at all girls schools and so far boys haven’t been high on the agenda. Of course it’s only a matter of time on that front...

FWIW I am apparently the only parent who hasn’t immediately said it’s fine Hmm x 10000000

OP posts:
LeekMunchingSheepShagger · 28/02/2019 22:25

Probably never! There will be booze and boys.

Cocobean30 · 28/02/2019 22:31

I would say never, it always became a party in my experience (as a trusted teen) ;)

SinglePringle · 28/02/2019 22:39

I went to a highly respected / academic all girls grammar school. All our parents believed us when we said our varying brothers would be looking out for us.

Off popped the parents of 14/15 year old girls, all believing we were being looked after by our respective brothers.

All parents seemingly forgot that each brother would be attracted to his sisters mates and therefore less focused on what his sister was up to with his mates.

Ah, the parties as had!!

Good times!

BigGreenOlives · 28/02/2019 22:43

We did this when dd was 15 & her friend got really drunk & threw up. First I heard was the other mother ringing me to say thank you as dd had been such a star. Other family knew we weren’t there. We didn’t supply them with alcohol.

BackforGood · 28/02/2019 22:47

When they get their own shared student house ?? Grin

pocketdelia · 28/02/2019 22:52

Can you just let them have the sleepover and go out for a few hours, then pop back, say goodnight and stay in your room thereafter with your ear pressed to the wall of course ?

Original poster
FelicityPorcine · 28/02/2019 23:05

It’s not at my house so not sure they’d appreciate me turning up Grin

OP posts:
JustDanceAddict · 01/03/2019 07:10
  1. My DD def has.
anniehm · 01/03/2019 07:31

16+ but in our case older sister was home. This summer both are being left for a fortnight but society now deems that they are adults (my baby turns 18 soon)

Soontobe60 · 01/03/2019 07:34

Never!

PRoseLegend · 01/03/2019 07:42

Depends on the kids.
If my child was like me (bookish, responsible, planning an LOTR extended version marathon, and never shown the slightest interest in boys), then 16 is fine.
But if they have a few "boy" friends, and those boys live nearby, then I wouldn't allow it until 17 or 18.

Fairylea · 01/03/2019 07:42

Never. Too tempting to invite other people over or boys etc.

Boys aren’t high on the agenda!? Boys are ALWAYS high on the agenda GrinWink

Lost5stone · 01/03/2019 08:03

I always find these threads so interesting because me and my friends were left overnight from about 14. Sometimes there were boys, sometimes not. By 17 there weren't any rules, as long as I was respectful. And I appreciated that independence.

However DD is 2 and I can imagine I will never think what I was allowed to do would be acceptable, even though I never came to any harm.

JustDanceAddict · 01/03/2019 13:13

Indeed Lost5stone, we had mixed sleepovers from 15. There was snogging and heavy petting but no more than at a party. Wouldn’t matter if there were parents anyway as we all slept in the living room and the parents would be asleep upstairs if in.

BrokenWing · 01/03/2019 13:55

twentyone-teen

Missnearlyvintage · 01/03/2019 14:06

At 15, I was telling my parents I was going to sleep over with just one female friend's at her house, then going to who ever's house party it actually was, getting as wasted as I could, and taking my boyfriend along if I had one at the time...

Perhaps the nearest parent to the house could pop around at some point in the evening to check all is fine?

YeOldeTrout · 01/03/2019 19:05

DD was 16 when she hosted 3 other girls (age 15-16). We had to be out of town. Nothing went wrong. :) The other parents were all fine about it.

"Good" (smarty brainy sporty ambitious) girls. No boys present :).