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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

DD 17 in a complete mess urgent help needed

31 replies

crepeyneck · 12/01/2016 20:32

DD is a high achiever got a scholarship to a private boarding school. Last week she made the decision not to return. She has a place to start A levels in Sept but we can't find any courses starting in January to comply with Act that says she has to stay in education until she is 18. Only thing we have found is a 12 week Princes Trust Team Programme.....

OP posts:
chelsbells · 12/01/2016 20:34

Since when did you have to stay in education till 18? Plenty of people leave school at 16 and get a full time job.

Can't she get a job then begin A-levels in September?

LIZS · 12/01/2016 20:37

Try your local fe college. She may be able to join a shorter course or self study.

bigTillyMint · 12/01/2016 20:38

I know of several teens who have dropped out (Y12) and no - one has followed them up so far. The parents of a couple have said they are home - schooling them - I think they told the old school. The DC are doing a range of things. Some nothing much, some doing an Alevel at home, some building up art portfolios, etc.

harridan50 · 12/01/2016 20:39

So is she not taking her gcses

Hulababy · 12/01/2016 20:42

chelsbells - since 2015, in England the leaving age for being in education or training is age 18. You can work, but you should be also involved in PT education/training

England
You can leave school on the last Friday in June if you’ll be 16 by the end of the summer holidays. You must then do one of the following until you’re 18:

  • stay in full-time education, eg at a college
  • start an apprenticeship or traineeship
  • work or volunteer (for 20 hours or more a week) while in part-time education or training
MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 12/01/2016 20:44

It changed last year I think - DS1's year group (he's in Yr13) was the first that falls under the new rules - school leaving age is raised to 18 (although they can do accredited apprenticeships or vocational courses)

When we were looking at colleges (before we realised that it's now only school sixth forms that do A'Levels in our area) it did all seem to be September- June courses. How about courses aimed at adults? They tend to be shorter in duration.

Would her new school be willing to offer advice, or allow her to attend even if she doesn't take exams until she's officially on the course?

Shockers · 12/01/2016 20:48

The Princes Trust is a fantastic organisation, and the 12 weeks might be a very useful distraction. A friend of ours started a business with a £2500 loan and a training course from them, when she was in her early 20s. She now employs 30 full time staff, plus angency staff for events.

I think the rules are education or training until 18.

LagoonaBlu · 12/01/2016 20:50

Is she doing GCSEs in the summer? Why is she not returning, when she has nothing to go to?

CMOTDibbler · 12/01/2016 20:52

Our local FE college had a big sign up outside saying they had courses starting now - I think especially for those that had decided not to go back to school after christmas.

Soooosie · 12/01/2016 20:55

You can always home educate her for a bit

NerrSnerr · 12/01/2016 20:58

Have you tried the local FE college. If she has a place in September for A levels what was she doing this year? AS levels? GCSEs? Just so it's clearer what she's doing.

Original poster
crepeyneck · 12/01/2016 21:09

She did her GCSES in summer and started the IB at a private boarding school. She absolutely hated it and was due back on Sunday but refused to go back. She can do A levels at her old school starting in September.

I have tried every college near us and further away that advertise January courses but they are all evening so not enough hours and they are too expensive for me to afford.

Even home A levels courses are very expensive. I am on a low income

OP posts:
Original poster
crepeyneck · 12/01/2016 21:14

I work full time so not sure they would accept as home educate.

I have seen a TEFL course online. This would be great for her as she wants to be an English teacher and to travel....

OP posts:
claraschu · 12/01/2016 21:20

Just deregister her and tell the school that you are temporarily home educating. HE can be what ever she wants and doesn't need to include any formal education at all, if she would like to learn in another way.

It is very likely that no one will follow up on this with you though you may be asked to fill out some paper work.

When my kids temporarily HEd, they did a combination of volunteering, studying on their own, doing some music, art, and sport, having some tutoring, travelling, working, etc.

Go over to the HE threads if you want suggestions, but really you can just help her to enjoy a sort of gap-half-year.

GraciesMansion · 12/01/2016 21:23

I very much doubt anyone is going to chase you about what she is doing, especially since she was at a private school and she'll be 'off the radar'. My ds 11 started at a private school in September and so didn't turn up at the state school where he also had a place. No one has contacted us at all to find out where he is, which I find quite worrying! I

MayhemandMadness · 12/01/2016 21:28

LAs wont be monitoring now who has dropped out as such as we have gone past the reporting dates for govmt so unless she turns up and reports herself as Neet then no-one will be monitoring her until next Sept. Best bet would be a little part time job were she can build up some experience and earn her own pocket money and some voluntary work experience within the industry which she wants to get into so she can include this on her uni applications if she is planning on going.

Soooosie · 12/01/2016 21:28

What does she want to do long term?

Home ed takes many forms!! She could do two days each week as work experience somewhere relative to an aspirational future career. A day with tutors (maths, PE, music or whatever). A day at home furthering what ever interests she has. A day socialising with other home educated teens doing what ever - making music or building dens.

She could really utilise the time to experience things that might help her future career

Soooosie · 12/01/2016 21:41

Ok so she want to be an English teacher.

Could she volunteer in a local primary school to read with infant/junior kids two mornings a week. Also do extra work with non English speakers.

Or even helping out with a home ed forest school would help with the teaching aspect.

She could join online or real book clubs, then read and reflect x100

Volunteer at the library or tourist information two afternoons?

She could also take up a sport

Original poster
crepeyneck · 12/01/2016 21:51

She wants to do an English degree and teach English at secondary level and maybe travel and do TEFL.

She is no trouble at all it is just she hated boarding school (her choice to go) and was getting very depressed. Now she is back home she is very happy.

She got a part - time job today and has decided to either do the Princes Trust course or religious studies AS level distance learning in 6 months.

OP posts:
Original poster
crepeyneck · 12/01/2016 21:54

Not sure how government departments work but I told Child Tax Credits she decided to leave school today. Just want to make sure we both keep within the law regarding children in education until 18. ...

OP posts:
wannabestressfree · 12/01/2016 22:02

You can get your child tax credits reinstated when she returns to school for both the years.

RueDeWakening · 12/01/2016 22:17

If she wants some experience working with children/teenagers, she might be interested in Girlguiding UK - helping out with Brownies (7-10 years) or Guides (10-14). Assuming she's 16/17, she could join as a Young Leader working towards her Adult Leader Qualification which is a Guiding qualification with a number of modules to complete. It can be awarded as soon as she reaches 18 if she's completed everything for it.

If she fills out the form here, someone should be in touch fairly quickly.

rogueantimatter · 13/01/2016 10:08

Hello. Possibly a bit left field but just a thought after reading about her interest in RS - many churches do youth leadership programmes and probably other courses.

Free Buddhist Audio has lots of amazing lectures too.

Would she be interested in doing creative writing as a university Department for adult continued education evening class perhaps?

HarrietVane99 · 13/01/2016 11:06

There are a lot of free online courses in a range of subjects available through Futurelearn: www.futurelearn.com/
They are provided by universities, so are of good quality.

Adult ed classes run by universities aren't cheap, and they're supposed to be undergraduate level, so not sure they'd be right for op's dd.

AndNowItsSeven · 13/01/2016 11:11

You will lose tax credits and child benefit if you home educate. ( dc who were HE before they turned 16 will still be entitled)