Support thread for parents of multiple teenagers.

[alistron1]

I have 3 teenagers, they are 13 (boy) 14.5 (girl) and 15.5 (girl) I shall mostly be talking about:

Food - how much do they sodding eat?

The fact that they are sullen introverted beasts whenever you want to go somewhere or do something - but as SOON as you sit down to watch something that YOU would like to see on YOUR tv they rock up and witter at you nonstop about various fascinating topics ( "Have you heard about X who's got this amazing youtube channel, it's hilarious..." "You know my friends neighbours aunts cousins daughter, well she....." "I made this awesome axe on minecraft....")

The constant sneering derision about my life/clothes/interests but if my stuff isn't nailed down it gets 'borrowed'.

The many and varied prima donna moments over the most trivial of things " Where are the black tights, I HATE you, you're controlling and you've got me under house arrest..."

Their pits aka bedrooms aka health hazards

The fact that if I need a charger for something or my headphones they have been appropriated

And finally, that unlike toddlers they are in your face until nearly bloody midnight!!

And with 3 of them there is a non stop caravan of hormones, drama, requests for cash, hormones, tantrums, hormones.

I think that's about it for now.

Not on the list?
No chance.
Although being as I'm the one doing the shopping, if I spot something I like, I add it on in the shop. He's always at liberty to come with me...
All I tend to get is a sad little disappointed noise when he realises that there's no bacon, because he forgot the rule. I'm finding my Aspie a very easy teenager for the most part.

I did roll him out of bed yesterday. and onto the floor to wake him up because we were going somewhere. He continued to sleep on the floor until I dropped the cat on him.

Can I join the club please? Two teens both girls and I am definately the worst mum in the world.

Both my horrors did very well in exams, better than I'd expected, since they decided they didn't need to study AT ALL.

I'm nodding vigorously re the shampoo bottles. I hide my naice shampoo and conditioner, herbal essences is good enough for them. We seem to have 5 bottles of that in various flavours on the go at the moment. And the entire collection of the body shop and (fecking) lynx in half used containers.

Ditto DS and the boxers/dressing gown combo, he's wearing this right now. I sent him out to bring in the bins, did he put on clothes? Fat chance. Now all our Stepford neighbours know I have no standards.

DD is asleep having stayed up all night waiting for her results. Oh good. This means I get to gently remind her at 3am to turn down her effing TV AGAIN, JUST LIKE LAST NIGHT AND THE NIGHT BEFORE......

No Maryz lovely, it's the perfect time.

Yes perfect time for wine I think.

I've just got home, the kitchen looks like a bomb has gone off and ds1 is still wearing the very fetching dressing gown and I suspect yesterdays boxers combo.

I shouted. Loudly.

I know have a cup of coffee made by ds1, the kitchen is being cleaned and dd is cooking dinner tonight.

Ds1 still isn't dressed but I'm never going to win that one am I?

Hah!

Due to their flukey success in exams today I have offered to feed them anywhere they like tonight. I was imagining the local Italian restaurant, can just taste their fab penne (slavers).

But no, dressing would be too much of an effort so we are having fecking McD's. Big Mac meal, anyone?

My DS1 does that too, "oh I can't be bothered to have a shower and get dressed, can we just get a takeaway?"

He has to be surgically removed from the dressing gown.

It would be quite useful if my DS would tolerate a take-away on occasion, but he really hates almost every variety. He will cope with pizza in an attempt to be with friends.
Dressing gown? Yes. Huge and black and fluffy from Ikea. I bought 3 of them and they rotate.
After a couple of years being horrible about it, he has discovered the delights of my kindle on the train last week. I haven't had it back yet.

DS doesn't read. At all. Unless he absolutely has to.

Oh unless you count 10 million bbm messages a day as reading?

i have the opposite problem. DD always has her nose in a book or her kindle. Always. SHe's one that sits with it propped up while spooning her cornflakes in the general vicinity of her mouth.

DS and the boxer/dressing gown combo - Oh yes! Thank goodness its not just in my house. Maybe its the new fashion? I always wondered about Axel in "The Middle" TV show. Now it makes me snigger, Except of course that mine usually has his hands down his shorts. Just in case the beastie escapes..... :D

Oh dear god yes the hands permanently down the shorts.

Why??

It hasn't gone anywhere FFS

It drives me insane.

Mine reads all the time, he's more likely to have a book in his hand than anything else

DD1 Always has a book/her kindle on hand, if not in hand. But, DD2 reads sporadically at best: One or two days a month she will decide she is reading all the things. the rest of the time books are evil. DS (11) is jut starting to display teen behaviours, and I really don't know if I can take it again.

Well after reading all of this I can go to sleep now knowing that its not bad parenting on our part..........I just have three 14yr old selfish, ungrateful, teenagers.As I am an older mum............er I`m 60 I am also an embarassment to two of them................having just lost my mum 4 weeks ago I am very glad that I always treated her with respect. Thats not in my threes vocabulary!!

Make that two Rubes!!

I'm going to bed. The teenage monsters are still up, eating and arguing. Ds1 is still in the same boxers and dressing gown. Dd has lost a contact lense and is screaming bloody murder for DS1 to help her find it.
Ds1 is pretending to be deaf, whilst simultaneously on his phone, eating frosties and holding on to his "man bits" for dear life.

I give up

I can't wait to go to work tomorrow.

We are off out early today, so I insisted they go to bed at reasonable 9:30 - 10pm. SHouted at them at 10 because they were still running about slamming doors and generally annoying eachother. I went up at around 10:30. Had just settled into a lovely sleep when I hear this banging and crashing.....11pm.....ds1 has decided to play drums on various tuppaware pots in his bedroom.

I never thought Id ever say f to my kids. But I walked in there with a "That the F are you doing" swiftly followed by a "Get into your f*king bed and go to sleep. " Oh the shame. I am not normally a sweary person.

Its now almost 10 past eight. He is still in his boxer shorts. And they are upstairs fighting. Give me strength, we leave in 10 minutes.

Mine are supposed to be leaving with me this morning to go and see their aunt. I said if they were ready by 8:30 I would give them a lift so they can get there early, have breakfast and go out for the day with my sis and teenage nephew.

It's 8:21

Dd is ready.
Ds1- still in boxers, minis the dressing gown eating toast.
I just spoke to my sis.
Nephew sitting on the sofa in boxers eating toast playing Xbox.

I give up.