Teenage DS has just asked me something

[frumpet]

He is 17 and wants his girlfriend to stay the night ,in his room . Gut instinct is no ,what do you all think ?

He's 17, he's an adult. He'll move out soon anyway and do what he wants.

I think it's too young. Could she stay the night but not in his room. How old is GF and how long have they been together?

But will it drive them to shag in the cemetary? Tricky TBH. What does your DH say about it?

I would say yes if they were in a long term relationship

But I know thats an unpopular opinion on MN

I would say yes - they are both legal, and its good that he felt that he could be open with you about it and not sneak around in the cemetary like Kreech says.

Does he only want her to stay the night 'for shagging purposes'. Does she live miles away and needs to stay over? Sorry lots of questions and a twelve year old son so need to learn stuff.

I would if they had a longish relationship.

My boyfriend was allowed to stay over but had to sleep in the lounge, we would have a shag in there then I would go to bed

It's your house.
If you're not comfortable (and especially if the relationship isn't especially serious) then say no.

Can they stay at her house or do her parents object?

Much as I would be screaming NONONONONONONO! in my head, I think I would agree provided I could check with the girlfriend's mother that she was OK with it.

Does his girlfriend's parents know? Do you know them? Do you know her for that matter? How long have they been together? Are you happy with it?

Yes in theory, he's an adult and it's nice her asked you imo.

Are you likely to be woken up by shagging noises or would he be considerate?

if they are old enough to have sex then you are better off respecting them and allowing them a safe space to be. I was allowed my boyfriend over at that age. I would only say yes if they were in a proper relationship - and he should be prepared to talk about contraception.

I think it's so hypocritical to stop teenagers (of this age) sleeping in a bed together under their parents roof - obviously it won't stop them having sex somewhere else if that's what they want to do, it just makes the parents feel less squeamish. might as well face the truth...

If she's also 17, her DPs have not forbidden it and you have had a convincing conversation about contraception then I'd say yes.

I'd say yes if it's a steady relationship, but I'd check it was OK with the girl's parents too. There's nothing wrong with saying no though, if that's what your instincts are telling you.

17?

Yes.

As long as her parents were OK with that.

It's old enough to have a sexual relationship and I'd rather such a relationship were in the context of romantic association and wanting to spend time together. So my household would be open to facillitating that.

Just asked DH, he doesn't see a problem either.

I'd say no.

They have only been together a few months , have never met her or her parents , she lives in another village and he wants he to stay here so they can meet up with other people on strike day . He did say he would sleep on the floor with the bedroom door open! she is 16 i think ,same year but slightly younger .

Ive said yes to my dd and her bf (so has his mum) they waited for a long time and got to know each other well before they started having sex. His mother and I talked to each other before either of us said yes, and we had both had long conversations with our dcs about sex (emotional and practical) .

Tbh im proud of them both for being so responsible with their attitudes and as above I didn't want to drive them to the nearest cemetery or bush (like I had to .

Oh yes, definitely have the contraception chat first.

Havent had chance to talk to DH as he is out ,told DS i will give him my answer at the end of the day .

Do you think they have already slept together?