Just Surf, feat Lost and The Small Mercies

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Hello and welcome to our support thread for anyone struggling with cocaine. Whether you want to quit, cut down or are someone whose life is affected, all welcome.
We offer non judgemental advice, tips, some silly chat and most importantly lots of support and encouragement.

Come and join and we'll all help each other surf the urges!

It's like Pandora's box - I wish I didn't know how good it feels. Life seems colourless without it.

Aye I know that feeling Serial. You've opened the door onto a nicer world where everything feels great and even your fags taste better and the bloody thing won't shut now!
Hope you managed to force yourself to bed.

I'm getting quite excited about our bandito moustaches. It'll be damn difficult to get anything near our noses with a hairy handlebar in the way.
Slight bonus there.

Thanks ladies. Sober tonight. Feels so much easier in the week. I'm not helped by being menopausal and seeming to have a period every three weeks. . And eldest DD displaying very rude teenager behaviour. And Work being a bastard.

At least with this menopause I'll beat you all to best tache and beard

Hello Ponz yeah I find early in the week easier too. Sounds like you're having a bumpy time at the mo with lots going on. My teens are boys, maybe they're slightly easier- they just grunt at me generally, make a mess, eat loads and sleep.

You've given me menopause fear, it sounds awful. Glad to hear you'll be embracing the beard! I have a long chin hair that sometimes appears overnight, I won't be letting that bastard grow.

Have a good week all x

Monday- I'm never doing that stuff again
Tuesday - I don't need it, although it's quite nice sometimes.
Wednesday - I'm definitely waiting for a special occasion
Thursday - is it Friday tomorrow? Are we going out?
Friday - have we got some in? Ooh!
Saturday - maybe call just in case we run out...

Still surfing here, I'm once again in the grip of a huge craving. Despite being clean and good I spend huge amounts of time thinking about it. Tonight I'm thinking fuck it - what's the point of all this effort. I'm going to take myself to bed though like a stroppy teenager. Nearly 7 weeks clean - I'm sure that there are some benefits. Someone remind me.

Ha I hear ya Dusty, amazing how quickly our minds forget the downside.
Serial, you're doing great. See Dusty's Monday state of mind as to why you should keep surfing. I've said before if you could bottle the comedown and sniff it when you get tempted we would be fine.. I think!
Still surfing here but also had a massive fuck it all moment at work today, it's only that I'm still ill and don't want to make myself worse that I'm clinging on

Hello all.
Sorry I've been quiet. Went overboard on Friday and felt dreadful yesterday.
My car also died and has to be scrapped so having an awful weekend. Times like these remind me that we would be much better off and wouldn't have these shit money worries if we didn't waste so much money on the white stuff.

I'm wallowing in sadness and self loathing today!

Hope you're feeling better Hooch.
Totally identify with your weekly itinerary Dusty. Someone once said to me Be Careful what you practise, because practice makes perfect. That sort of makes sense. You keep repeating the same pattern of behaviour and it becomes an ingrained habit after a while.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing eh.

Hello back here again and a part time lurker.

Spilt up with do and feeling incredibly self destructive - not had anything for ages but feeling so down I just want to get off my tits and forget everything

I'm sorry you're feeling down Ginger It's easy for me to say, but it won't help in the long term..
Keep strong if you can. It must have taken strength to split up with your dp, especially as he was your get high buddy. You can do this.

Ooh Lost, sending hugs, nothing worse than have to deal with 'life' on a comedown. Ginger sorry to hear about your split, try and stay strong. The comedown won't be worth the high but know what you're saying about just wanting to forget it all. Maybe just get steaming drunk instead??

I'm still not 100% well, bastard virus still lingering so can't run and I'm very cross! On the plus side not drinking much as don't want to make it worse again. Every cloud and a that...

Get well soon Hooch you've really been suffering, look after yourself and lots of early nights madam
I quite miss my little bit of exercise if I don't do it. It definitely helps with mood. I'm sure you'll be back running soon.

In a better frame of mind today. Sorry about my moanings yesterday- was feeling sorry for myself. All self inflicted really.
Have a good week everyone. Ginger hope you're feeling a bit better about things x

RIP your car lost. That's shit.

Hooch, you really have been proper I'll?

Ginger, you ok?

Still clean here, am having huge mood swings and cravings though. Poor everyone who knows me!!

Evening Serial. I had to scrap the car. It blew a head gasket and I think I nearly did too when the garage condemned it (not helped by being on a terrible come down that afternoon FML) Managed to find a second hand car today.

Agree about the mood swings. Sometimes it's just an all consuming head fuck. No advice but I know what you mean.

Your car dying while you're on a comedown is a total bastard! Well done on surviving it. I'm totally fed up of "trying" to be clean - I can feel the fuck it switch tripping.

The (massive) downside to flicking the fuck it switch is probably like a distant memory to you Serial but the high is not as amazing as you think it is and the come down is much WORSE than you remember!

You're doing bloody great. I know what you mean though, surfing is a huge mental effort at times. No wonder we're grumpy.

You're very wise Lost!

Evening ladies. Gosh sorry about cats and lurgies sending you all love. And ginger a more serious commiseration break up sounds horrid and no wonder you are feeling all fuck it and vulnerable.

I've got no gear left so doing the usual enforced clean time altho still boozing. Will try not to buy any when the man comes to town but haven't managed it yet.

Still convinced that for me the only way to stop is to cut out the means of getting it.

So I'm about two weeks clean? And counting.

Cars not cats!

Evening all! Hello my lovely Ponz, I have fallen off the booze wagon and had a few sherbets. Well done on 2 weeks, I'm on 5 but have been shamelessly messaging Mr BI (wtaf?) luckily he's ignoring me. #No actual off switch

Well I haven't missed hangovers! Thank goodness Mr BI didn't pick up otherwise I would have been in a terrible state What was I even thinking?! Have a good day all x

Hangovers are gross hooch lots of coffee and carbs for you. And a blessing that mr BI didn't answer.

I'm deep in the menopausal tunnel so hangovers are amplified at the mo. Doesn't seem to be stopping me tho!

Good Friday evening surfers.
We'll call that a fateful swerve Hooch. Hope your head's ok today and Mr B.I didn't message back today A few drinks in and I'm easily swayed too.

Pat on the back Ponz I didn't realise you were quietly surfing to 2 weeks clean. Don't worry no cats were harmed last weekend

You're all putting me to shame- I'm 1 week clean and even though last weekend turned into an episode of Fear and Self Loathing in the Suburbs, I'm craving my head off.

Just remembered it's your birthday weekend Dusty
Happy Birthday
Wish I was there! Don't party too hard x

I'm craving the mother of all parties involving a bit of the old Colombian marching powder! Still stumbling through a very messy breakup with someone I adore but who is eminent a waste of skin and oxygen, when it all boils down,

Got two uni projects to finish by Monday afternoon and the kids are off to their dads for the weekend.

Haven't touch the stuff in a month but bloody hell adulting is hard.

Can I please stop now!

Have