Jive Bishop and The Surfettes: Surfing on

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Welcome to our support thread for anyone struggling with cocaine. Whether you want to quit, cut down or are someone whose life is affected, all welcome.
We offer non judgemental advice, tips, some absurd chat and most importantly lots of support and encouragement.
Come and join and we'll hopefully all help each other to surf the urges!

It's very quiet here... are we all being good?

I'm being a good girl tonight!

I had a massive wobble on my board today but managed to swerve it. DS has been at his dads since Tuesday which is a massive trigger. Went to a friends for drinks last night and was hanging like a mofo this morning. More work drinks at lunchtime and thought I couldn't possibly make it through the day without phoning a 'friend' Instead I went home and had a nap and went back out tonight - go me! Reasons I didn't...

I could be bothered to wait round in London for an hour for him to turn up.

I couldn't really afford £60 after holiday of a lifetime

I didn't want head to toe horrors in the morning

Hope everyone else is doing ok. Well done Cleaning and Serial, good girls all round

Love no time lurker here, never had the guts to post. Have gone overboard tonight after 6 days of surfing, we only had half between us so hoping we don't feel too crap tomorrow else arguments will ensue.

Really trying to get a handle on the mental grip it has on me, hate spending so much money on it to feel crap and extra anxious,
Feel so awful that I do it when the kids are in the house, even though I play with them, feed them, cuddle them, love them, this vice is shameful and I wish I were strong enough not to be in its grip,
I can't say the 'a' word out loud as it's too scary.
Anyway sorry for posting, hopefully I'll be back when I'm back on the board

*long time lurker

Welcome to the board, Changed!
I'm guessing it's a weekend treat for you - don't be sorry for posting, sometimes it's easier to explain when you're a line or two in...

It is a weekend treat, but recently it has been several times a week which is not where I want to be.
I don't know where to begin as everything is just a mess in one way but on the outside all still holding together. I have 'ishoos' which I suspect contribute, but ultimately it is me more than dp that wants to make the call, just to relieve the burden for an hour or two, it's the time when all our plans are made, but most of mine are rarely executed. Fed up of letting everyone down, and lying by omission to friends.

How did I end up here? Why do I have no self control? Sorry am waffling. Will come back when head is straight xx

Welcome to the thread Change no judgement here. I hope you stick around. It does help to write it all down and talk it through.
I could have written half your post myself and I understand the shame and guilt.

Cocaine is psychologically addictive. I always underestimated what that actually meant until I found myself in the grips of this addiction. It's all too easy to keep going back to.
Don't beat yourself up today. Have a shiny new surfboard and be positive about the changes you want to make.

In other news, I got really messed up last night . I should never have got so pissed as it always makes me slip off the board.
My life feels like a chaotic mess this morning and I feel like a depressed 80 year-old.

Hello changed I think we can all identity with everything you've written.

Lost, never mind! It's so easy to slip off. Especially after drinking. I hope you don't feel too shit today.

And hooch - get you with your nana nap! Well done!

Lol to the nana nap Serial, also known as a Disco nap round here.

Oopsie Lost, that so easily could have been me too. It was mainly getting access to it and the money that stopped me. I only wanted a bit to keep me going... nana naps may be the way forward. Hope you're surviving the day, at least it's a bank holiday weekend.

Hi Changed, hope you're feeling ok today too. Keep posting on here, it really helps.

Hoping I can stay surfing for the weekend, DS wants to watch the boxing at some ungodly hour tonight so that should keep me on the straight and narrow.

Have a good at everyone x

Long story from me. Went overboard on other stuff on hols last week and feel beyond terrible three days later. Out tonight but surfing will be easy as other party goers 'only' drink but I could do with sitting on sofa and getting head together.

More later. Good luck to all this weekend and welcome to changed.

Hope you're ok Ponz. I'm intrigued about your long story. Hope you're taking care of yourself x
I could do with sitting on a sofa too. Just got back from my nieces 3rd birthday which I survived by eating lots of sugar. I need a big nana nap.

Never heard of disco naps, although I'm no stranger to Disco biscuits Hooch

Ooh Ponz, hope you're ok. Have you been 'avin it large' in Ibiza??

Ponz, what have you been doing?! Hope you're ok. Am moderately French this evening. Have had a lovely afternoon with friends.

Having been nana napping all afternoon while dh is out with ds. Bliss.

Be kind to yourselves even if you've wobbled... The number of times I've said Never Again and then face-palmed. Feeling positive this time but it's taken a good few years and several grand utterly wasted to get here tho.

Feeling v sleepy and quite headachey. Been a while since I've passed the 3 week mark. In the end we had to distance ourselves from certain friends which i felt bad about at first but was definitely the best move.

Want to get back into baking soon. Ordered some nice decorating bits from Amazon. For a while there I couldn't even look at flour or icing sugar

Happy Saturday, I might sleep some more

I'll look out for you on the next bake off Cleaning. You'll be the one keeping your work station all tidy and polished

A few Balls of Steel awards being handed out tonight on here.

I'm not touching anything for the rest of the weekend. I feel awful and I'm so tired my eyes hurt.

Enjoy your Saturday evening all x

Baking? My goodness, I'm so impressed! Am going to bed via Calais soon. Lost - you will feel better tomorrow. Go to bed! That's an order.

Probably best if you don't participate in the baking Serial. You have a history with oven trays
Only joking, you're doing bloody great. Good luck with the Channel crossing.
I'm safely in bed after a horrible day feeling dazed and confused.

Our neighbours are having a loud party tonight. Tsk, party animals so annoying Night all xx

Hello surfers

Havent posted in a while but have been lurking!

Me & DP have got back into old habits recently and have shared some Tuesday, Wednesday and yesterday. Went overboard yesterday and had work at 9 today felt shit.

So was walking home after work thinking about how stupid I am whilst finishing my last fag and walked past an e-cig shop went in and came out with a starter kit and 3 flavours I have smoked around 10-15 a day for 10 years. So now I am double surfing. A brand new me I might even start yoga.. or erm whatever sophisticated adults are supposed to do.

Good luck on your surboards this bank holiday its always a craving for me I might swerve a planned night out tomorrow you know, because im sooo sophisticated now...

Name, you've gone full hipster!

Morning all
Well done Name on your epiphany! You've kicked this stuff before, you can do it again.
I have occasional moments of clarity when I realise everything will be better without drugs. I've just got to start loving my life (and myself ) more than I love cocaine..

Hope you managed to survive watching the boxing with your ds Hooch. Didn't it start at 4am or something?!

The sun's shining, hope we're all loving life today

Morning! Managed to avoid staying up until 4am by persuading DS to record the boxing and watch this morning, far more civilised. Mr BI called yesterday evening but I ignored him Feeling ok today hope everyone else is too.

Hi Name, good for you on your double surfing efforts. I vape too, it's actually ok. Good luck and keep posting x

I have a tip to prevent runny nose. Before you go to bed, as in before you'd normally start snivelling, even if you don't do anything else, rinse your nostrils with a saline spray. You can get it in a little bottle for children and I fill mine up with my contact lens saline - it's exactly the same. Over the basin, spray loads up, try to almost inhale it like when you are swimming, give your nose a gentle massage and then blow, repeat for other nostril. I didn't do this last night and am really suffering today, proof it works I suppose!