Professor White and the line dancing surfers eat cold turkey

[serialtester]

Welcome to the surfboard!

I'm joining anyone else wall crawling tonight. I fkn forgot to buy wine, supper is still deep frozen and I am low on cigs.

Low on cigs?? Fuck! That's an emergency!

Am eyeing up the overflowing ashtray and my packet of skins..... at self for sitting round in pyjamas all day doing sweet fa. Totally forgot it was saturday, nothing local open now nor tomorrow. Except the bar, where I will go for fags and decide that I need deserve a drink and then the alcoholism (replacement for coke addiction) will take over. Crap.

Ok, ad hoc ashtray rollies will see you through to the morning. Do not go to the bar. You can have a nicotine infused arm band.

I have to say that yesterday and today I've actually felt content and happy. Maybe after 5 weeks my brain chemistry has recovered? Or was it the kebab?!

Two armbands on. Thanks. Will make rolling quite hard!

Am watching slow tv in real time - some dam in California is threatening to overflow. May watch one of those Norwegian slow tv shows instead as a distraction util supper ceases to look like an iceberg.

There was a thing on R4 about slow TV the other day. I hadn't heard of it before and now here you are watching it! Our armbands and shit are multi purpose by the way. We're a lighthouse for anyone struggling. We're quite empathic for a bunch of coke heads!

ha ha yes the ad hoc ash tray rollies. Foul but needs must! Hope you manage to avert a crisis.

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Lost, I'm booking in to your fictional rehab - but it will be after our famed imaginary thread night out!

You're actually well on your way to gaining a gold surfing medal, serial

I'm imagining you as the wise old penguin on Surf's Up.

I do feel a bit mystical. And penguiny. I'm basically the pope of coke.

Ooooh, a penguin movie.........I lurv penguin movies. Back in a bit!

pope of coke More tea vicar?

Hope our lovely FlatWhite is ok tonight. Glancing nervously at her quiet surfboard.

Actually I'm now suddenly consumed with a sore throat. Have I fallen victim to the surfer illness doing the rounds or have I inhaled my son's hair after cutting it?
This drama queen is retiring to bed .

Sending positive vibes to all fellow surfers

Back from bowling, ds is overtired and doing my head in.

I'm turning to wine to help me sleep as he's wound me up the little darling. No dabbling tonight

Every time I get a sore throat I'm going to picture user's fucking dentist

Ah bless him, he's probably had a brilliant time.

Night, Cleaning, calming prescribed by Dr. Lost.

God shut up Cleaning . My dentist has never mentioned anything, always very chatty and friendly. maybe he dabbles himself?

Dr Lost - sore throat? I think I've infected you. Sorry! Go to bed! Cleaning, join me on the wine train! Chin chin!

Yes it was fun, we all laughed a lot. I miss that. Maybe I'm also wound up because I'm feeling guilty. But I can't dwell on it. I've made progress and I'm trying really hard.

I'm worried about flat too...

V rare for me to ask dh to get me vino esp when it's just the two of us but white wine is better than white powder!!

I swear since I read user's post I've been swallowing profusely to see if my throat feels funny! I haven't even had a cig since I read that. See what I mean about my OCD??!!

I'm so sorry to let you all down, I am at home reliving a fantastic weekend inAmsterdam with the help of you tube and a very very small portion of our friend/ enemy !
Please forgive me , you are all so fantastic!
Yep you have guessed I'm that friend that chats for fucking hours... full of drivel!
I have had a tiny line in my defence, just enough to make the evenings company and hopefully a fresh start. Sorry, good night and well done

A small portion is ok, a little paddle. No deep sea swimming though!!