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Boys in dresses. Yes or no?

557 replies

spidermama · 30/06/2005 11:34

My DS (3.5) loves dresses and butterfly tops and glittery sparkley fairy type stuff. I have no objection. I even bought him a couple of dresses of his own to stop him raiding long-sufferine DD's wardrobe. My only slight worry is teasing from other kids. He wants to wear a dress to pre-school today. What do you think?

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Blu · 30/06/2005 19:07

Sorry, Fio, that's a terrible link to follow - you have to click for english, then start, thensemi-orthopeadic, than stability.....

Fio2 · 30/06/2005 19:25

sorry I gave up on the link

but yes they are the stability boots, i know that from memory and they arent that girly so dont fret

AnnaInManchester · 30/06/2005 20:33

I think it's fine spidermama. He should be free to express himself and be himself. If u didnt feel free as an adult u would feel a part of your life is missing or incomplete.

Kemal is wonderful !!!!!

spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:37

I agree about Kemal. I bet he's been thought a lot to be who he is though eh? But all the stronger for it.

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starlover · 30/06/2005 20:38

spidermama... go to meet-ups for details of next brighton meet! there are 2 i think

spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:40

sorry to be total novice, but how do I 'go to meet ups' Starlover?

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AnnaInManchester · 30/06/2005 20:41

I love Kemals style! He is my new role model! Such a diva

AnnaInManchester · 30/06/2005 20:41

and he is so pretty too! He is gorgeous!!!

spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:42

Yes Anna he is his own special creation. I feel a song comming on.

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starlover · 30/06/2005 20:43

oh sorry... dunno how you normally use the site, but at the top you should see the brown box and one of the options is "by topic"

click on that and it'll show you all the diff topics and one of them is meet-ups!

AnnaInManchester · 30/06/2005 20:43

Lol, yea, we can sing it for him when he comes out of the BB house!

spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:43

Wouldn't you just love to have him on your party list. God I miss my gay friends. They don't visit much since I had kids!

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spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:44

Thanks starlover. Will try.

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AnnaInManchester · 30/06/2005 20:45

His hair is divine too! and his pink sari.....oh kemal is the most wonderful person I have even seen. If he was straight I would almost fancy him!!!

spidermama · 30/06/2005 20:54

You've got it bad I can see. Just counting the mins til his next appearance.

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Blu · 30/06/2005 21:05

Spidermama - maybe we shoiuld arrange a 'boys in frocks' meet-up. I'd come to Brighton - DS LOVES Brighton - but I know we won't make it before the end of this summer.

spidermama · 30/06/2005 21:11

Hey anytime. I'm around. Are you nearby then blu?

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hester · 30/06/2005 21:29

I don't know who I love more, spiderboy or babyBlu

This thread made me laugh but also quite sad. I had an 'alternative' childhood and we were always the weird kids at school. Felt very different and isolated and would never want my child to go through that. I really understand the instinct to protect children from bullying by making them as 'normal' as possible.

On the other hand, here I am about to have a child who will have two mummies in an interracial relationship. (We'll never be able to move to Frinton now. ) I worry myself sick about what she may have to go through . But it drives me mad when people challenge me (and many have), asking me if I think it's fair/if I have the right to put in a child in a position where she will be bullied at school. I want to say to them, "Well, that's up to you, isn't it? If all the adults who said that lesbians shouldn't have children because of bullying actually DID something about the bullying, and made sure that their children didn't perpetuate negative attitudes, we might get some progress round here".

All of us parents have to decide how much we want our children to pioneer changes in the world they live in. Surely we don't want them to just support the status quo, but also we don't want them to suffer with their peers because of our views. It's a really tricky line to tread, I think. Though I personally think frock-friendly three-year-olds are safely on one side of that line. Don't nearly all tots love wearing sparkly things, whatever their gender (or is that just the ones I know?) And don't the boys get that suppressed out of them damn fast, if not by their parents then by their peers? Lord knows the big bad world will come to bear on spiderboy soon enough - in the meantime, he's having fun and is safe, so good for him.

spidermama · 30/06/2005 21:39

Interesting Hester. I know a man, opn the face of it very modern and liberated, but admits he'll never kiss his boys. Only his girls. Spiderboy went to a birthday party in man's house (in fab frock of course). Man's son laughed nervously at sight of Spiderboy at his door (the two are pre-school buddies) but later on I found boy upstairs in his sister's frock playing Princesses with spiderboy. He changed to come back down. But how sad to feel such shame at age 4! At any age in fact, but worse still at 4.

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tamum · 30/06/2005 21:40

hester, FWIW, one of dd's closest friends has two mummies, and she and the others seem to understand that her mummies are partners and simply don't bat an eyelid. This friend is mixed race too. Dd is actually frightfully impressed that this means that she doesn't necessarily have to marry a BOY. They are 7 now, and there has been no teasing at all. That doesn't mean there never will be, I know, but it may not be as bad as you fear. I do hope not.

Heathcliffscathy · 30/06/2005 21:42

hester

what a fab post.

VladimirIlyichUlyanov · 30/06/2005 21:43

sorry you are all mad
boys dont wear dreseses
theyll take the piss
youa re in cloud cuckooland

snafu · 30/06/2005 21:43

Better late than never

Heathcliffscathy · 30/06/2005 21:44

cod why does your attitude surprise me not a jot

VladimirIlyichUlyanov · 30/06/2005 21:44

id never send hte dese in a dress
mind oyu we dont have one
youa re all really deliding yourselves
( says old hardedned cynic)

this is a very mumsnet htread and is a load of crap