What to wear for a theatre charity gala with no dress code

[HelpMeFeelGorgeous]

I’m off to a theatre-related charity gala which is likely to have numerous celebs in attendance. It’s a lunchtime champagne reception and buffet followed by the matinee theatre show.

I am 49, peri-menopausal and feeling frumpy. I have absolutely no idea what to wear and there hasn’t (yet) been any info shared about dress codes etc. I want to be prepared in case it’s smart (and don’t have anyone to ask about whether these things tend to be). I’m attending alone but might meet up with friends afterwards so don’t want to be all dolled up while they are in jeans and trainers.

i’m 5’ 9” and a top heavy uk16-18. I have had surgery which has left significant scarring on my legs so I would need a jumpsuit, trousers or maxi dress. I’m a bright cool winter in colouring.

I found this when searching: it’s possibly a little more formal than I would like though.

https://www.monsoon.co.uk/sienna-embellished-maxi-dress-blue-1001128287.html?utm_content=brand&nbt=nb%3Aadwords%3Ag%3A21426431457%3A198557365801%3A805447420077&nb_adtype=pla&nb_kwd=&nb_ti=pla-2692893077232&nb_mi=12198991&nb_pc=local&nb_pi=1001128287&nb_ppi=2692893077232&nb_placement=&nb_li_ms=&nb_lp_ms=&nb_fii=&nb_ap=&nb_mt=&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21426431457&gbraid=0AAAAADjtA_GralCbLrbeUfI-v5iWc3C-L&gclid=Cj0KCQjwt9jVBhDXARIsAFSP-6fFKs66z1BQ7roK3GBfHDKfRjPDB-2EsL44unhEYtDiCsWzijz-BXgaAk84EALw_wcB

There’s a navy version of it, or there’s a navy lace jumpsuit which might work?

https://www.monsoon.co.uk/monica-lace-wide-leg-jumpsuit-blue-20004710003.html

Or would smart black jeans and a nice top work? (I already have those!)

How was this snarky & rude? She gave a few simple facts to evidence what kind of a site Maison Noir is - exactly as dozens of posters have, warning others not to buy or recommend. It's information, not insult.

I didn't understand why demantoid took offence to this.

I think you are overthinking this @HelpMeFeelGorgeous

Anything will be fine that is smartish. I've been to this sort of thing before and there is normally a range of attire -some people more very smart Buckingham Palace garden party (without the hat) dresses style; others smart jeans and a blazer style. Actors and anyone going who is likely to be photographed (show creatives) tend to take a bit more care - but many people will be more smart casual end of the spectrum rather than smart smart formal end of the spectrum. As long as it isn't ripped jeans with your butt hanging out it will be fine.

It's a Sunday and it starts at 11.30am so most people aren't going to be going ultra-formal.

It's predominantly a fundraiser so I wouldn't get your hopes up too much about "numerous celebs" in attendance. Obviously the named person will be there and probably a scattering of a few actors who are associated either with the company and or the show in the past or friends of them but they are usually a long way from 'numerous celebs" that may depend on what you class as a celeb though.

If there isn't a specific dress code stated, I'd just do whatever you want - if you want to dress up a bit go for it or if not that's fine. If you google press night parties, you can get an idea of the range of dress (although discount the female actors actually in the show as they tend to be more party-style dressed up for the evening and this is daytime).

Obv.

OP - a beetle-green jumpsuit? Only in 18 but that might be better anyway. The kimono-shaped top & V-neck are generally a very good style for those that are big of boob (speaking from experience!). You might find a 16 by checking the find in store option. I really like this.

https://www.phase-eight.com/product/nora-jacquard-jumpsuit-230670693.html

Obv? Not to me.

I thought that novelty cufflinks are the sort of thing that men are given as leaving presents, & they get pushed to the back of the drawer, never to be seen again!

I love cufflinks on a man - or woman - especially vintage/retro/antique ones, but these veer towards the gimmicky or slightly naff to me. And I've never noticed them being worn by anyone at any of the more formal theatre/arts events I've attended over the years, although I suppose they must have been ... I genuinely don't know anyone who would wear those?

If you thought this might suit, OP, it might be worth signing up for a notification if it comes back into stock?

https://www.hollandcooper.com/products/phoebe-vneck-maxi-dress-jewel-green

This maxi dress has a wrap top, that may give some flexibility.

https://raishma.co.uk/products/frankie-navy-dress?variant=55414738583928&utm_source=google-x&utm_medium=paid&utm_campaign=23766883867&utm_content=&utm_term=&tw_source=x&tw_adid=&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23762291993&gbraid=0AAAAADbSZ1AbEW2ie61xGPUHaL0SCCwPW&gclid=CjwKCAjw_eLVBhBEEiwAeaYZfF-xMZXVZq2iXxmCnEUzhAQziuETPtQeU8yPW2VCIUrKPf1gbYYrGhoCBrsQAvD_BwE

Or this Monsoon one, which is a bit more muted.

https://www.marksandspencer.com/v-neck-long-sleeve-patterned-wrap-dress/p/clp23097616?intid=mobile_app_pdp_share&color=GreenMix

This may have too much olive in it, though it also has blue-greens through the black as well.

https://www.harrods.com/en-gb/p/allsaints-printed-diana-midi-wrap-dress-000000000000164224?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=EN%2BUK%2BPMaxShoppingDDS%2BOnlineLow/Weak%2BAny%2BFashion%2BTier+2&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20505708959&gbraid=0AAAAADm-wgOgZ3qxL4B-GpVeJoh5zWY-Q&gclid=CjwKCAjw_eLVBhBEEiwAeaYZfE_B9WVr6f-oA6GhnKHwdlYIg_g0ziPIJNfOuRNpuWJanK1P8htRyhoC-LgQAvD_BwE

If some of what's been posted so far is too bright, how about these grey/plum tones?

https://www.very.co.uk/religion-enid-occasion-maxi-tea-dress-grey/1601282324.prd?variantId=X094P&cm_mmc=google--PLA+-+Generic---_-__%5BAdID%5D&utm_campaign=Generic_Fashion+Clothing+%26+Footwear+-+Womens+-+PMAX+-+Catch+All&utm_medium=cpc&utm_source=google&utm_term=&campaigntype=shopping&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20397404566&gbraid=0AAAAAD2k1i2jsGoW-ZoweR2L0N0ASOTPX&gclid=CjwKCAjw_eLVBhBEEiwAeaYZfADt2TACvulQJ7cUwALv9EKjEgrM8bHjQfauia4cvWgALR1d2J3wNRoCG5IQAvD_BwE

Or similar but darker shades.

https://www.freemans.com/womens/dresses/midi-dresses//N-1lZ1z141odZ1z13vpb?fs_alp_id=monsoon-glen-floral-jacquard-midi-dress//A-74J232_14&ns_mchannel=pla&ns_source=google&ns_campaign=full-dresses&utm_medium=pla&utm_source=google&utm_campaign=DEP%3AWOM_CAT%3ADRE_THE%3AGen_CHA%3APmx_CFO%3AMx%2BF_ADV%3AFreemans_PLA%3ASA360_INV%3AGoog_OBJ%3AConv&ns_mchannel=pla&ns_source=google&ns_campaign=DEP%3AWOM_CAT%3ADRE_THE%3AGen_CHA%3APmx_CFO%3AMx%2BF_ADV%3AFreemans_PLA%3ASA360_INV%3AGoog_OBJ%3AConv&ns_linkname=20281768709&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20281769669&gclid=CjwKCAjw_eLVBhBEEiwAeaYZfEaOrB_QoIAX7U_shpY3oVYSouKMvdINNx1YYP2UnK8_7qSL92HidhoCrtkQAvD_BwE

I LOVE this one. Have a feeling they don’t cut for the well endowed but might be worth a try.

Are we saying maxi rather than midi? Although my height/boobs means lots of maxi dresses are actually midi dresses on me!

The Freeman’s one is nicer. Wear boots if the dresses are midi.

@EleanorMc67 wow, another great selection of dresses!
You make me want to have a vast wardrobe of gorgeous dresses!
But as I rarely go anywhere really nice now it'd be a complete fantasy indulgence!
Love everything you've posted here but particularly the olive green Harrods one. In my fantasy life I'm definitely buying that. 😂

I think it’s the same issue as the above though, where a size that fits on top is going to be massive on the bottom.

@HelpMeFeelGorgeous Before I got a breast reduction, I had exactly the same issue! Separates were my salvation. Now I’m same size top and bottom and it’s transformed my life! I’m happy shopping! What about smart velvet pants (M&S have some) and a silk satin top? M&S have them too! You can get both bits fitting then. Though I’m aware you need more fabric at the front and the back of tops can be too big! I do know how awkward dresses are when you are bigger on top. I was left some money and got my op.

There's also this shorter one in the same pattern? I tend to ignore midi/maxi descriptors (or midaxi!!) as, like you, my height will often determine whether it is midi/maxi/whatever!

Have a look at the Religion website - there might be others you like. Their sale is good.

I don't think maxis are limited to evening though - I would happily wear several of mine during the day. With flat shoes, trainers, whatever works best with the dress.

https://religionclothing.com/products/floral-taupe-print-denise-tunic-dress?_pos=95&_fid=f90ac8ccc&_ss=c

Just wear them anyway! You will make people in the queue at Asda (insert supermarket of your choice) much happier!

I like the look of that green one too - it's by AllSaints.

Oh I do, I do wear them! We do go to the theatre and cinema and galleries the odd social thing and I love to dress up. But for the rare trip out somewhere I have enough. I got maybe three new dresses from charity shops in the last year and another two brand new, and I've got loads of others. No qualms about wearing a very nice dress to the supermarket but I don't actually need anything that costs a couple of hundred when I have lovely charity shop finds for under £20!

I love looking at them though. 😂 And you are my S&B guru. You always post lovely and interesting stuff. 💚

I want @EleanorMc67 as my personal stylist!

Shame I can't afford one.

I fear more options at this point!!! Have boycotted M+S for years and velvet feels like a bad idea with a blonde shedding dog, but I have ordered some separates to try as well.

I think parcels are all going to arrive this week and I’ll be trying stuff on all weekend. Might need to warn someone in case I get stuck in any of them!

And yes, HUGE THANKS to everyone that has made suggestions. I may be spoiled for choice!

@HelpMeFeelGorgeous Are you going to this event with your dog?

Obviously not.

I'm curious - why have you boycotted M&S? A bad experience with a prawn sandwich?!!

Totally understand re Shein - & tbh I'm not sure the Izabel dress you liked, & a few other things that have been posted, are much better. I'm always a bit wary about really cheap clothing (& food, & really cheap anything really ...). But it's fairly easy to make relatively ethical choices at M&S (though less than it used to be since it started to compete with cheaper fast fashion stores). I've decided to try & not recommend polyester stuff - though I see I've slipped up in a couple of the links I've posted!