Is this not special enough/expensive enough for my son's wedding?

[flowersandmusic]

My son is getting married next year. June wedding. Someone on her recommended this dress for someone else. I went ahead and ordered it - a size smaller as that was all that was available. It has some weight to it and I love it but is it a bit cheapskate for mother of the groom. The money is not www.debenhams.com/product/jolie-moi-angel-sleeve-tiered-hem-maxi-dress_p-3e6c2c44-815f-42c7-b1db-67eae670cce8?colour=Multi&size=10&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22915808283&gbraid=0AAAAABevdS7lom0v68CypUOUtJ7wI713e&gclid=Cj0KCQjwio_RBhDMARIsAJPveNPX9QJHogyDX5JR4S_T4TALqJat6EcPACrQj2f_XntgPAeZTx04zrkaAnTFEALw_wcB

People here seem really confused about money and style. You don’t have to wear expensive things to look good.

The issue with these dresses isn’t how much they cost: I believe that for a wedding they just don’t look stylish enough for me. These are dresses I would wear to lunch with my girlfriends, but not for my son’s wedding. I think you can find something more suitable and stylish for the same price.

For weddings, mothers usually wear something more tailored, like a dress or a suit; that’s what I would go for as well.

I would also wear these dresses every day for basic outings.Is it a crime not to wear sweatpants saying ‘Juicy’ on the back for the school run?

If you think they’re too much for everyday wear, then something is off with your style.

@Crikeyalmighty Have you ever worn a more formal day dress? They are not rigid! Do you think they are boned? Rigid? What dress or jacket is rigid? Never had one - although a boned dress would be but guests don’t wear them.

i just don’t go for that style I guess, tried a few on and at 64 made me feel old - also to be honest I don’t have use for them - whereas this dress I could wear over and over again

That's a great dress, which can be worn many times, and the discount is just a bonus - and I doubt anyone will know (or care) that you were smart enough to save a few quid

That look is very dated, uncomfortable to wear and doesn't suit everyone. Also it's not suitable for the wedding OP describes which is a small country house wedding followed by a small family lunch. Her dress is much more suitable for that.

I don’t think you understand what kind of outfit I’m talking about. They are definitely not outdated or uncomfortable.

Even if they were, I don’t understand why every single outfit should feel like you’re in pyjamas. There’s nothing wrong with dressing up and looking elegant at a wedding, no matter how small it is.

I had 8 people in our garden during COVID at our wedding, and people made a lot of effort to look great; regardless of it being “only a garden party.”

It's a lot nicer than many of the frocks at the semi-royal wedding on Saturday and they would have cost far more!

It will absolutely fine with a nice hat, fascinator and shoes.

Ooooh! Fascinators are banned on MN!

@Crikeyalmighty Who really expects to wear the outfit they choose for their DS’s wedding over and over again! You just don’t do this when it’s a special outfit for a special day. Otherwise you might as well be the other poster and wear it on the school run with trainers! The occasion does really warrant something better - and I’m older than you!

I think it’s a gorgeous dress and perfect for the occasion. If you like it and it suits you, I dont see why you should opt for anything different.

Sorry but I just have to point out that a poster calling herself “Ms Doubtfire” said this, a character known for his/her impeccable taste and inherent style 😅

What an odd idea. Why on earth would you not want to wear something again?

I can't be doing with one off occasion dresses. Waste of money. I'm unlikely to be an M of B any time soon but if I were I'll splurge £££s maybe even ££££s on something I'll wear the hell out of afterwards.

I am not fond of polyester floral dresses in small print and fussy sleeves and frills but you are tall and can probably carry it off. I find the colour quite difficult - does it suit you?

I think you should wear it with a structured jacket to make it more smart. I quite like the Roman navy jacket linked below. It is admittedly MOB but not extravagantly so.

It's really lovely

I would keep it for another special occasion and find something more suitable. Normally both Mother's wear a single colour dress/skirt-top duo with a matching hat.
You could wear that dress the next day?

I don’t think it’s weird.Some occasions call for a special dress that you wouldn’t wear for everyday outings. That doesn’t mean it has to be expensive.And I know it’s hard to imagine in our modern society, but not every decision has to be based on what someone personally wants to wear. Sometimes it’s about the occasion itself. If the wedding is relaxed and the bride and groom are showing up in jeans and Converse, then by all means wear the same kind of dress you’d wear out to lunch.
But if the bride has spent a lot of time, effort, and money organising a lovely event, the least the mother of the bride can do is wear a suitable dress; even if she won’t wear it again for a while.

Sometimes the outfit isn't about personal comfort or whether you'll wear it again. It's about showing respect for the occasion and the effort that has gone into it.

OP is the mother of the groom, who loves the dress. And she could also wear it again. Surely that's win-win?

@Historian0111101000Far too many posters don’t seem to want to respect the occasion or the bride! Of course you might wear the outfit again but as I’m mum of a bride later this year, I’m really not going to wear either of my outfits regularly afterwards! But I want to look good and appropriate. Plus I guess I have the money not to worry about getting loads of wear from special clothes. I used to buy a new hat and outfit for Royal Ascot in the Royal Enclosure every year too!

You make it sound like OP is suggesting going in hot pants and a crop top! (Which someone actually did to my wedding, and while I didn't think it was the best choice it didn't ruin the day, either). She is talking about wearing a dress which is sold and marketed as occasion wear. There is nothing disrespectful to the occasion to go not dressed as the late queen.

Whether you can afford it isn't the point. I don't see the point of owning but not wearing lovely clothes.

If I were looking for a MoB/G at the moment I'd look at Kindred of Ireland or Casey Casey's more colourful dresses or there's a lovely fitted white silk Comme des Garcons jacket on Envoy of Belfast which would look lovely over their floral or striped skirts. I can easily incorporate all of that into normal going out occasions. Whether you, (general you) don't think those are "special" is up to you. I certainly wouldn't even look at those dreary Beulah dresses at the recent Royal wedding.

Exactly. There's nothing wrong with OP's dress. I wouldn't pick it because I don't like dipped hems, but it's fine for the occasion.

Again, it’s going to extremes. You don’t have to dress like a late Queen to look elegant.

I just don’t think a polyester dress (sorry, but it looks cheap) is the right choice for a mother of the bride. For a 20-year-old cousin who wants something for a night out later on, sure.

Style isn’t about money. You can find something for £59 that isn’t plastic and still looks elegant.

Personally, I don’t think this fits a wedding for a mother of the bride. She asked for opinions, and this is mine.

It’s lovely OP - go ahead!

If you are worried about whether it’s “fancy” enough, you could always add a straw saucer hat in one of the colours to make it more formal.

But dare I say it I think super structured “mother of the bride” type dresses can look a bit dated, and the dress you have picked is more “now”.

And it sounds like the event is not super formal/stuffy.