Skirt/ jumper look. Am I too big for it? Or doing it wrong

[pontipinemum]

Honestly, I like how this looks on other people but I am not sure if I am doing it right.

Pics are bad, we only have 1 proper mirror pushed into the spare room at the min. That's just the dress, jumper tucked and jumper untucked. Then in the wild.

I'm just not sure I pull it off.

I'm sorry I just don't get it. All of these are so unflattering and unless you are 68, incredibly aging. I'd return everything, ditch the look and go for something completely different. It doesn't even look 'on trend'.

Gorgeous figure. You deserve better.

@FaceDownInAPuddle , quit the ageism.

What sort of look would you go for? I've been watching a lot of 'mid size' womens clothing videos. They were full of these sorts of clothes along with the shops.

In my 20s I live in a denim mini skirt + t shirt!

Is one of the problems perhaps that you're thinking in terms of pieces, rather than outfits?

I don't think any of the stuff you've bought today except the skirt is going to help your wardrobe much tbh. Can you set aside a day where you go to, say, Marks, and try on every pair of jeans in your size? Once you find what you like, buy the same pair in two different colours and then try on loads of tops until you've got 2 or 3 that work with both pairs of jeans. Have you got shoes/boots and a coat that will work with jeans? Then you've instantly got two or three day to day outfits that won't set the world on fire but will be wearable.

These ones aren't 'in' but I find them very easy to wear rolled up with DMs https://www.marksandspencer.com/harper-cigarette-ankle-grazer-jeans/p/clp60590909?color=INDIGOMIX#intid=pid_pg1pip48g4r1c4

I've also got these https://www.marksandspencer.com/high-waisted-wide-leg-jeans/p/clp60585450?color=BLACK which work with trainers.

I like these roll neck merino jumpers in winter https://www.marksandspencer.com/pure-merino-wool-roll-neck-jumper/p/clp60614064?color=DARKBURGUNDY#intid=pid_pg2pip12g4r3c3 I'm busty, but find these work okay because they're a very fine knit

They also do the jumpers as crew neck and v neck.

They would also potentially work with your bias cut skirt for the pub/going out for dinner.

As I said, none of this will set the world on fire, but you can change them around with coats/scarves/footwear.

If I had your legs Op I'd be in jeans & a short sweater dress with tights!

When you put an outfit together, don't create blocks, and don't create horizontal lines.
The cream jumper over the red dress breaks you up into two bulky blocks, with the jumper having a bulky horizontal line.

The open cream cardigan over the dress draws the eye vertically, and looks so much better.

Look for styles that skim your body without adding bulk. Pleats, gathers, ruffles and cables add bulk.

Instead of thinking of yourself as mid-size, think of yourself as an hourglass.

Try M&S and Seasalt.

I don’t think the issue with the red dress is the size of the jumpers, I think it’s that the fabric weights just don’t go together very well. The dress is so light and floaty that anything heavy and woollen is going to look a bit clumsy next to it.

The bias cut skirt is nice but the collared jumper doesn't look like the right fabric- a knitted jumper would be a better contrast I think. And I usually like a tee showing at the hem, but that one is the wrong colour! Have you got a dark grey knit? Also, if you didn't mind, could you post some pics or links to the look you are going for? Is it the one a pp had pics of?

@RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie I am def thinking in pieces, that is how I always shopped unless it was for a very specific event.

I have been seeing a therapist for nearly a year and saw her today. Until very recently (and it is still a work in progress) she said I had 'zero self worth' this would tie into it I think. I sort of never really cared how I looked and as a result I haven't developed a sense of style. Last year I cut my hair in a different style for the first time since I was 16! I've been learning about make up and how to do my hair in something other than a pony tail or straightened for going out.

I don't want to set the world on fire, but I do want to look OK.

I liked this jumper earlier too but didn't buy it.

This is my usual day to day wear.

I think you need to ditch the cardigan. It’s making you look a lot bigger than you probably are, especially when done up and rolled up.

So the black skirt is a keeper?

I honestly don't know what sort of look I am going for. I have no internal 'minds eye' so I just don't put thing together well. And until now I've never been too bothered about my appearance.

I like warm, comfortable, practical, but also very easy to wear clothing!

You look so much slimmer in those clothes. Leggings are ok in the house. I think you need to ditch the round neck jumper thing. You need a cardi with a few buttons opened at top to minimise your bust and a few open at the bottom as is the trend with a little belt. This will flatter you I'm sure. There are some styles some of us just don't suit. I've always wanted to wear the knitted vest over a striped shirt but it won't work for me. Proportions are vital.

Try longer more tunic-like tops, @pontipinemum . You have good legs.
As in my pp, avoid chopping yourself into blocks, which those outfits do.

Thank goodness you didn't buy that jumper, it does nothing at all for you. The black t-shirt is good, the leggings are good.

Don't wear horizontal lines.

@bubzie , has suggested the sort of look I go for. The buttons create a vertical line up to your face. It looks elegant. The plain colour is uplifting and bright without being loud.
M&S is good for little cardigans like that. (Or they were when I got mine.)

How about a cord dress? J D Williams has loads of them!

How about some nice slacks, or wide legged trousers/jeans. Fitted tee, oversized cardigans with a huge knit. Boots with mini skirts is fine. Literally anything but this. If you are in your twenties steer well clear of this look. It looks so much older than you are. You have a lovely figure so I would go fitted, with a large cover up of some kind. Maxi skirts are very few people's friends.

I’ve got a couple of those M&S cardigans and do find them useful, although mostly for work rather than casual.

It’s a pity that the colours are mostly pretty horrible.

Mine are black, and I wear them with bright skirts. I have the same style cardigans from other brands, and I wear them with toning skirts.
I don't really do jumpers, because I tend to look more busty in them. The buttons shift the focus upwards.

Hoodies and sweatshirts turn me into a blob. Longer more tunic-y sweatshirts without the ribbed hem are ok.

I didnt see any regular sort of cardi's in m&s earlier but I was bogged down trying on jeans it's also a pretty limited store. I mighr do a big online shop and return what I don't like.

I find with cardigans they look odd on me unless fully unbuttoned. But maybe I'm just not used to it

I'm the opposite. I don't wear jackets open either.
Just don't do a blouson look.
That jumper you didn't buy was awful.

That jumper is awful (sorry!)

you look 100x slimmer in your everyday wear than any of the other stuff you’ve posted

have you tried anything v or scoop neck? I think that would suit you, and something with a defined waist

That green stripe cardigan you posted earlier is nice, I would wear that just with jeans and a t shirt/vest
m&S harper jeans are really comfy and a bit different to skinny ones

OK I like this dress.

https://casualcompany.ie/products/maisy-dress-green

I also tried on an old dress. I think the shape is ok. Bit short. But with fully opaque brown tights I think its ok.

My thing with whar to put over the dresses is more to do with being warm instead of looking for a fashion look. It's already pretty cold here so jumpers are just needed

Is there any reason you're so hung up on wearing dresses? You look so much better in jeans/leggings than you do in any of the dresses and skirts. Try a more modern cut of jeans and you'd look great.