Too scruffy for the Connaught…

[MarshmallowValentine]

Title describes me perfectly. Maybe not scruffy but never dressed up…I just somehow never looked groomed even when I used to try, so now I don’t try!

I wear cargoes or jeans, t-shirts or jumpers and birkies or boots. That’s it. I don’t like dresses and skirts. I’m 58, short and wide (size 18 bottom and 20 top) with a big bust. I am proportionate, carrying my weight all over, so I can’t dress to hide a larger stomach while showing off my great legs - if you see what I mean.

Invited to the Connaught for lunch and, while I’ve been to lovely hotels before and am also aware that I don’t need to dress up hugely, I’m struggling for what to wear.

Appreciate all advice and suggestions. Links gratefully received.

I would wear a pair of plain black trousers and whatever top you’re comfortable in. You can then wear your boots and be both appropriately dressed and comfortable!

How about a denim skirt with some boots and a nice jumper? I dont think you need to dress up overly posh for lunch ?

I would wear smart black or navy trousers, the boots you already have and a nice top. Some make up and jewellery and you're good to go

Could you just swap your top for a really lovely drape-y blouse in a colour that really flatter you? A silk shirt would be ideal. Some nice simple jewels, a swipe of lippy and you'll be good to go.

You speak of what you wear as if it’s a permanent and immutable state!

What’s your budget? Is your lunch a social celebration or a business meeting? And - how would you like to look?

My go-to for this kind of thing:

Plain black cigarette-style pants
Well-cut plain white tee in heavy cotton
Round-toed leather ballet flats or brogues in black
Decent blazer or jacket
Cross-body bag
Silver jewellery, not too blocky, not too fussy.

That sounds like it would mainly suit your style?

@ColdHenrietta - it feels like it’s become permanent! And that’s the trouble. I’d like to look ‘finished’ and a bit stylish. I have good hair - short but good style that suits me - and I’m ok for make up and jewellery. And probably boots! Few hundred pounds to spend.

No need to buy stuff that’s too far out of your comfort zone and you’ll probably never wear again. Simple black trousers and black or white fitted t-shirt or long sleeve from somewhere like Uniqlo, a contrasting necklace like a silver chain, and your existing boots. I got a lovely black boxy M and S cardigan from a charity shop recently which would fit nicely over the tee without being a formal jacket.

I love jumpsuits for this sort of thing, top and bottom half sorted in one go and can be as dressy as you want. I'm a similar size and have a couple for occasions.

Are you going to Helene Darroze? I’ve been for lunch there and wore dark blue wide leg jeans, and a frou frou blouse. I’m late 40s, size 16
I didn’t feel ‘out of place’ or anything in that outfit
(Just noticed you mentioned footwear - I had navy leather trainers on)

Me & Em.

Personally, I wouldn’t buy anything but if you did want to then why not buy a nice jacket? A nice jacket over t-shirt or jumper with jeans smartens up any outfit.

Get comfortable gorgeousness from
above - eg a coat and/or a dress.

The Connaught’s all Texan zillionaires so you don’t want to look like them.

No one will see your feet at lunch so you could -as I do - sashay in wearing superb shoes & kick them off under table/change into trainers for tube back.

I think the suggestion of a silk shirt is a great one - I own several and always feel great in them. The fabric dresses up whatever you wear them with, but the style stops it being too fussy or OTT. Pick one in a colour that suits you and wear it with well-trousers and you’re good to go. It’s an outfit that can take you to loads of places, so you’d get plenty of wear out of it too.

Relaxed fit satin shirt with black trousers and Chelsea boots?

https://www.simplybe.co.uk/shop/p/em782

Bit of nice jewellery and you are sorted.

Well, I’m not you, but if I were I’d want to avoid anything timid …

There’s an absolutely fantastic white cotton / silk top at Toast that would be at the top of my list for you if only the largest size were larger. Alternatively, I’m liking this co-ord set from:

ASOS Arrange Curve

(Fingers in my ears for the cacophony of clamorous voices keening that you’re not allowed to wear a high neck, or wide trousers, unless you’re 5’11, size 6 … You are. Or you could wear the top with something else, though that wouldn’t be as impressive.)

Would look good with your excellent grooming.

Next have an open blazer in a range of colours for £45. I wore the chocolate version over a black T-shirt and black trousers with boots to a hotel afternoon tea last week.

I am the last person in the world to recommend black trousers for anything, because they’re usually awful - but these seem like a good long term plan as they’ll go with anything and take you anywhere:

Karoline Vitto trousers

What, about how the op describes her style, makes you think that’s a good suggestion?

Did you mean to say they'll take you nowhere and will go with nothing? 😂😂😂 I can't stop laughing! 338 quid oh my giddy aunt

For absolute easy perfection, @MarshmallowValentine you could simply turn to

Issey Miyake Pleats Please

and choose a couple of toning items that appeal. Again, you’d have them in your wardrobe for ever.

I’d go to John Lewis (if there is one. Ear you) for one of their stylist sessions. I went with a specific place in mind and came out very quickly with 2 outfits. Saved me loads of time

The only time i was in there recent years I wore wide legged culottes in a sort of burnt umber from Toast and chunky-soled boots, a thin black knit under a very old boxy zip-up cardigan from Sarah Pacini and a heavy silver torque. DH had just got off a flight and was wearing a suit and an air of jet lag, and the other person in our group owns a chunk of South Africa and is mega-rich, lives in manky shorts and crocs, and was wearing whatever crumpled trousers and shirt he puts on when some dress code can’t be overcome by bribery.😀

What about a plain wrap dress or jumpsuit with your existing boots and accessories. You will have a lovely time. I also like the suggestion of jeans and a nice shirt. Have a great time and ignore whoever said its full of Texan Zillionaires.It really isnt !

Thank you for the suggestions so far. I’m feeling less alarmed at the thought of no cargoes and no Birkenstocks!