Too scruffy for the Connaught…

[MarshmallowValentine]

Title describes me perfectly. Maybe not scruffy but never dressed up…I just somehow never looked groomed even when I used to try, so now I don’t try!

I wear cargoes or jeans, t-shirts or jumpers and birkies or boots. That’s it. I don’t like dresses and skirts. I’m 58, short and wide (size 18 bottom and 20 top) with a big bust. I am proportionate, carrying my weight all over, so I can’t dress to hide a larger stomach while showing off my great legs - if you see what I mean.

Invited to the Connaught for lunch and, while I’ve been to lovely hotels before and am also aware that I don’t need to dress up hugely, I’m struggling for what to wear.

Appreciate all advice and suggestions. Links gratefully received.

Sam Smith did this look and he looked like a latex chicken. Utterly ridiculous.

https://www.independent.ie/entertainment/music/sam-smith-dons-latex-bodysuit-for-brits-red-carpet-dominated-by-black-outfits/42338079.html

It looks to me like it's aimed to plus size women 'baddies' under 35 who go to Turkey and have their stomach done or sculpted (basically stomach lipo that recycles their own fat to round off their hips more) so their whole frame is still full figured but their stomach is bizarrely flat.

This is hilarious 😆

Exactly this. If someone has gaps in their wardrobe why would the first thing they reach for to fill it be wildly overpriced directional fashion that they could only wear out once or twice before becoming 'the lady in the inflated co-ords/stapled trousers'?

Re shoes OP - this brand is a staple of mine, I have far too many pairs of loafers which I wear with everything.

I can't quite put my finger on what that asos curve monstrosity reminds me of. It is a bit futuristic/spaceman like is it not? Or maybe some sort of restraint suit/straightjacket. You'd just need a bit of hidden velcro here and there to pin someone down using the excess fabric.

Yes but there's a middle ground between that and " jeans and a nice top". You can do the weekly supermarket shop in "jeans and a nice top"

This jacket and trousers for example

https://www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/products/E479292-000/00?colorDisplayCode=09&sizeDisplayCode=003&sv1=affiliate&sv_campaign_id=78888&awc=6771_1761140301_f71c3b17141ec9f8eda8bd410f0f0ca7&utm_source=awin&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=78888

https://www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/products/E479292-000/00?colorDisplayCode=58&sizeDisplayCode=003

Smart Jacket and trousers look like a work meeting outfit, jeans and a nice top is perfect smart casual.

I agree that wide black trousers would be a perfect -and versatile - wardrobe addition.

Jeans and a nice top has come back as a going out (more evening) look however (as distinct from jeans and a presentable top for going around Sainsbury's). There are jeans and jeans

Black trousers are not London any more at all unless you’re on shift in Tesco or a bus driver.

They look like the bottom half of a uniform these days unless they’re insanely expensive Loro Piano.

Navy blue is fine if you must wear dark trousers, but you’d be better off in a dress, London women do them a lot.

You don’t need the full Disney Princess outfit but don’t think they’ll let you in wearing scruffy jeans.

It’s one of the best restaurants in the world, or was recently, and they’re not remotely bovvered about booting people out who don’t do credit to the (beautiful) historic bar and environs.

Buy M&S jersey wide leg trousers in dark navy. They are about £20-£25 and universally useful. Then buy a beautiful top in a colour than suits you. I have noticed Zara's navy satin shirt trending a lot for larger women. ( Featured in Riot Women and also worn in interviews by its author Sally Wainwright. I wore this exact outfit tonight and felt good. )

I would go for elevated version of what you normally feel comfortable in. Maybe something from All Saints or in similar style? Dr Martens Adrian loafers are classic and very comfortable.

There are a lot of lovely short jackets around at the moment that would look great with high waist trousers/jeans and smarter boots or loafers.
Example Jigsaw I'd wear this entire outfit to a posh lunch, it would be pricey but all wearable again.

@NotMeNoNo that’s a great outfit. Unfortunately, Jigsaw is anti fat people. They don’t do my size. I’ll look around for similar.

I have a couple of things by Toast which are expensive but have worn really well - I'm on the larger side (size 20) and find that L or XL fits me fine. If I had more money, I'd buy a lot more stuff from there! Something like this would look great with biker boots... Stripe Crinkled Cotton V Neck Dress | Midnight Blue | TOAST

@MarshmallowValentine you are not wrong (they do occasionally have an 18) and All Saints are worse actually, then everything is too long as well. I am a jeans person too I hate dressing up!

Mango and Phase Eight both have more affordable versions.

This thread is unexpectedly hilarious! Am
glad OP has had some sensible suggestions.

I think you'd have to be pretty bad for them to kick you out. If anything, the nicer the restaurant, the more they'll bend over backwards to make the customer feel like they can do no wrong.

@MarshmallowValentine I've had lunch at Jean Georges and dinner at Hélène Darroze in the past month. For JG I wore a white tiered Sacai shirt, jeans and red patent slingback kitten heels. For HD a maroon satin skirt, thin roll neck top and heeled boots. There's a pretty wide variety among the patrons. Some people get really dressed up and look completely glam and some are super casual - plenty of Adidas to be seen.

I think the PP who said it's full of Texans might be thinking of Claridges (which is). The Connaught less so.

Hope you have a great time and feel amazing in whatever you choose!

God forbid you end up looking like a bus driver.

London threads always make me laugh, but, 'Nobody wears black trousers in London' is priceless.

Absolute rubbish. Loads of professional women wear black trousers in London, particularly at this time of year until it starts to warm up again, and they are great as part of day to evening wear.

Is there a border crossing where you have to surrender your black trousers before they let you in?? 😂

Something along these lines? Might be a bit OTT if you usually wear jeans.

Oooh - as a 14 to 16 I don’t think I could get away with ‘cigarette pants’.

OP is a larger size and this isn’t a trouser style which would necessarily work for her. I speak as someone who’d love to wear this style!

Unless they’re from here, apparently. You have to whip your trews off at Watford so they can check your label before you travel any further.

uk.loropiana.com/en/c/woman/trousers-and-shorts

I’m a 14 and wear cigarette trousers for work sometimes. They’re not necessarily ‘current’ but I don’t care much about that.

I think (as with so many situations) size alone is not very useful. If you’re tall and a size 14 that gives you a lot more scope. I’m not particularly!

I think the delicious phrase ‘cigarette trousers’ just makes me very envious 😄.