Mumsy and Frumpy

[HelenSkeleton]

I hate the terms mumsy and frumpy and am using it for convenient shorthand. I don't know how else to describe it.

What makes people think someone dresses in this style though? It's more than wearing old fashioned clothes as there's stuff in the shops that look dated. Vintage and old fashioned aren't the same.

How do you avoid it?

This is a massive factor - thanks for articulating it so well, @museumum. Clothes and outfits that are neither one thing
nor another. Also, thinking that black goes with everything - it doesn’t!

I think it’s hard to say that certain specific items are frumpy in themselves. It’s a vibe. However, some patterns and fabrics are especially tricky - I’d say patterned jersey is up there. And badly cut and dyed hair can make anyone look frumpy.

Op I use Pinterest it helps me find cuts and shapes that suit my body type rather than other platform which just sell you the brand names etc

Focus more on colours that work together and pieces that fit will together.

Fo example, my 5 year old navy blue trench which is oversized slightly from Zara is out again, paired with a crew neck fitted black t shirt but think intmimissi type, balloon legged cos trousers from last summer in an off white shade. Chunky waterproof trainers or my Bostons depending on the weather. Throw on some sunglasses, fav pair of gold hoops and hair in a pony.

Make a Pinterest board of what you like and what works for you. Then go into your wardrobe and find the pieces that go well.

Scandi street style is my favourite because it’s practical for kids, suits our weather in the uk and follows silhouettes/colours that suit me. With that style, you can get away with not having your nails done or the perfect blow out. Hair up in a bun or loose platt which adds a bit of a frazzled touch albeit but works well.

I wear what i like and anyone who doesn't like it can go and screw themselves. It works for me!

Totally agree with this. Own your style and wear it with confidence.

if you had the budget to buy designer clothes from head to toe you could still look frumpy and mumsy. The clothes need to work as an outfit. @User564523412

Expensive clothes have very subtle visual differences or tailoring that are designed to make the wearer look better. If they don't fit properly, the cost won't mean they look good.

Lululemon leggings paired with extremely expensive sneakers will look vastly different to Tesco leggings and outlet store Nikes.
They won't.

@museumum , I agree. I feel frumpy when I have made an effort to 'look nice'. I feel like I am wearing someone else's clothes.

If I wear what I like then I feel fine.
Totally agree about wearing a proper waterproof.

@HelenSkeleton , the cartoon pic looks fine to me.

Some colours are frumpy.

I find the main issue, certainly mine, is footwear. I have arthritis and wide feet so most fashionable shoes are out. I have several pairs that technically fit but I can't decide where to wear them, so I wear trainers from September to March and look a bit scruffy whatever else I'm wearing.

Find clothes that suit your body shape and colouring. I did a style analysis a few years ago and it’s made a huge difference to me.

What will look frumpy on one person, will look stunning on another.

I buy most of my clothes from Vinted and alter them myself on my sewing machine.

Stay thin.

And FFS don't wear dungarees with dinosaurs on them or try to be 'kooky'. Its the ones that dress LIKE a toddler when they've got one that really gets me....

Yes finding the right colours that work for you is key. Also knowing what necklines and sleeve styles suit you. I look much better with a slightly puffed sleeve if I’m wearing a short- sleeved top as they balance me out.

I alter clothes too @BurntBroccoli . My clothes generally are from charity shops.

@Whichhandbag , Slim not thin. Mind you, on here, thin probably means not weighing more than what would put you in the BMI normal range.
I'd be fat at the top end.

Me neither. I have 25&21 yr old DDs and they only wear leggings to the gym and would t be seen dead in a baggy long T shirt.

I feel like I can’t get away with some of the stuff I wore when I was younger, or that young adults wear today.

I’m careful now about prints - I feel a bit twee or wannabe cutesy in a lot of them, even if I’d love the same print on wrapping paper etc. I also try to avoid looking scruffy - young people can pull off artfully scruffy but I’m past that now.

I’ve replaced printed stuff and hoodies with plainer things worn with nice costume jewellery, belts, shoes / trainers and socks. I have quite a lot of trainers on rotation, which helps them keep smart looking for longer.

I feel like I go frumpy when I start wearing clothes that are formulaic. I remember going through a phase of leggings and a t-shirt/sweater because I had no time to think about clothes. But what I hadn't realised is what looked alright initially, looked pretty shabby after a few months of repeated wear, but I hadn't stopped to notice the bobbling / vomit stain that hadn't washed out properly.

Obviously, that coincided with having small children, having gained and then lost weight rapidly so my clothes never quite fit, and frankly not having enough time to always shower, never mind style my hair. So hence "mumsy".

I call it Lucy and yuk.

I think it’s about dressing in a way that looks as though you’ve borrowed your mum (or even your gran)’s clothes. So it will be different actual clothes depending how old you are.

Lucky for all of us then, that you have the budget not to be naked. But I suspect that if all you could afford was Primark or Shein you would somehow manage to bring yourself to wear it.

I think the moment one starts to think a supermarket longline t shirt over jeans to hide a bottom is flattering is time to re-think. See also bootleg jeans that flap round the ankle with a wedge boot.

I am 56, 5,9 and 13.5 stone. No one would ever describe me as gorgeous. But I know how to dress in ways that hide bits without looking like I am.

I mix and match stuff from zara, FC, JL, Marks, Next, Reiss, White Company and Phase Eight. On Thursday I wore a chocolate Next blazer with a long satin skirt, black roll neck and biker boots. My 18 yo apprentice said I looked fantastic 🤣

I get it all from charity shops and Vinted - it’s much cheaper than primark and shite. You should try it!

Me too. Summer I live in Birkenstock, Winter Biker boots. Fancier shoes, and I benefit from a small heel, have kitten heels. Have just bought Tayla boots from Dune, bloody comfortable and look awesome.

Unnoticed vomit stain is definitely mumsy/dadsy! I mean, we've all been there.

Well if you want to be truly trendy in your footwear choice apparently you need these. I must admit well, they’re pink so… but the price…

Those Tayla boots are fab.

Let’s remember this is all a matter of personal taste. Most people when they try to, do look nice. Sometimes we are all too busy to try and maybe we all look a bit less nice. No need to snob all over what someone else wears