38 and done with dye, growing out my grey hair

[BoogalooBoo]

I'm 38 and I've finally decided to let my natural grey hair grow out and stop dying it. I was naturally dark brown but for about 10 years the badger stripes have been getting wider and wider and now my roots are an even mix of salt and pepper. I've always dyed my hair back to brown either myself or at the hairdressers, but this time I just can't be bothered!
Been thinking about growing it out for years but always give in after an inch of white/grey/brown roots grow back. The regrowth is now at 2 inches and looks awful (a mix of light brown highlights in a clear line, natural brown and white and grey) but I'm hoping to hold my nerve this time... I'm excited and feel a bit defiant(?) I feel like I need a sign saying 'don't worry, it's deliberate, I haven't let myself go'.
Has anyone else grown out their greys in their 30s? Did you just go cold turkey or get highlights, or cut your hair short to speed it up? How long did it take?
Feels like the start of a long journey...!

I’m using it each wash at the moment but when I get a colour I’m happy with I plan on using it every other wash until my hair is of a length where I can have the blonde cut out. My understanding is that once you stop using it, it will wash out.

I’ve only been using it a few days though so I’m perhaps not the best person to answer your question!

@glasgowstations Ive only been using it for a short while and as far as I know it will wash out but not immediately. If I stoped using it now it would take a week or two to be totally washed out.
I use it at every hair wash, however I only wash my hair twice a week. I put it on and massage it in, wait five minutes then go in the shower. Hassle free and impossible to get wrong. Definitely doesn’t dye skin, towels and bathroom tiles, un like my box dye which used to get everywhere as I was a bit slapdash!

I washed my hair with regular shampoo last night after 3 washes in 4 days with the Plantur. D’you know, I really like my hair colour today! It doesn’t look as coppery at the roots and the rest has a really nice, deep caramel colour to it. There is a demarcation line where the grey/dirty brown meets the ancient blonde but you’ve got to be really looking for it to see it.

I first looked at using Plantur ages ago but was put off by the “not suitable for blonde hair” bit. Now I’m wondering why I didn’t start using it months ago!

If you are thinking about it - do it!

Really interesting reading this as I'm 37 and going grey naturally. I haven't dyed my hair since 2014 so that definitely helps that I've not got a clear line of roots between grey and dyed bits. They're coming through in silver streaks now which I actually really like.

I get a Brazilian Blow Dry every 6 months to keep my naturally frizzy hair smoothed out and am thinking of getting it cut into a choppy, chin length bob once more grey is coming through. That's the plan anyway!

I do hear many more women in their 30s talking about going grey naturally. Most of the resistance and comments about how old I'll look if I let myself go grey come from older women e.g. my mum's age. She is in her late 60s and still dyes her hair so it's highly likely I'll be fully grey before she is.

Thanks @guestusername I’m quite intrigued…I’m just nervous after 3 years about having to start again and so many products promise to wash out but then don’t really. I’m going to buy some I think and stare at it in the bathroom for a few weeks before deciding - if you ever do leave it to wash out do come back and post the results!

I think what’s interesting is why we think aging = bad.

I love grey hair on other people but it would look terrible on me. Warm skin tone- tan well. Very freckly but dark brown freckles. Very dark eyes and eye lashes. Very thick naturally black eyebrows. Hair very dark. I’ve been blonde and silver (dyed) when younger and it completely washes me out. Mid 40s and have a few grey bits which stand out in stark contrast to the rest of my hair. Trying to blend them in just wouldn’t work.

Hmmm. I’m starting to think that I’m not doing something right with P39. I use it and try really hard to leave the top of my head until last so it has the least amount of time but I still end up with almost ginger roots. It does tone down when I do a normal shampoo wash.

is it worth blending some normal shampoo with the P39?

@guestusername got to be worth a try? I haven't used it as I'm still at the "embracing my greys" stage as I only have a few silver streaks....but how about if you did a double cleanse so first shampoo using the plantur one and then a gentle shampoo for a second wash?

I stopped having light blonde highlights just before lockdown, I have brown colour hair, with a little auburn in my hair , i was a blonde child it went mousey at teenage years, I realise the light blonde washed me out after having highlights all these years, now at 65 have left it natural, I love the condition of it, its lovely and soft, but I do have a few silver strands coming through, so not sure what to do with it, I don't want to back to having highlights.

Ive gone from mid/dark brown to entirely white in just over a year.

Had highlights in June 2024, then more in September from where it was easy to just let it grow (I have shoulder length hair and didn't want it shorter).

I now have about another inch of blonde to go before I'm entirely white. I've never had so many compliments on my hair!

I’m going to stop dying my hair too. The grey at the front takes too much gaff. I can no longer dye it mid brown.
I have a short bob.

Faff not gaff.

I think that will be the next step, thank you

I’ve been at embracing stage since the start of this year. It’s as far as my ears now but I had an awful mix of dark grey, white grey, mousey brown and old dyed blonde and although I had a lot cut off in February and again in May, I wasn’t willing to go any shorter so I was kinda stuck with it. It didn’t ever start looking any better and dyeing it still wasn’t an option, so using Plantur 39 seemed like a good idea, and on the whole, it is but I can’t be dealing with roots like that, which is ironic considering what it looked like before 🤣

Will update next wash and see what happens 🤞

Interested in the plantur 39 results... I've gone too golden brown/dark blonde now to try it. Today I saw a photo of myself taken last year with my hair dyed dark brown and it looked awful, so fake and washed my face out. Going lighter and lighter again has definitely been the best option, I'll keep going towards grey but don't think I'll be able to cope with going cold turkey like I thought I would! It'll be a longer journey towards my natural greying hair for me

@LizzieSiddal @SuperTrooper14

Do you have any pics of your grey blending to share pls? Even if it's just the roots? I want to start this journey but want pics to show my hairdresser so there are no misunderstandings! Terrified and excited in equal measure!

Any pics of very dark brown haired people growing out 50-75% grey would be very helpful.... I want to do it but struggle imagining it and lots of pics online are so made up and posed....I know my hair won't look like that everyday!

I stopped dyeing in my mid-30s as I started reacting to the dye. I don't recall it being appalling but (a) I maintained a fairly short bob and (b) I'd been using semi-permanent colours so, while there was an element of build-up, it faded over time so the grow-out seemed a bit gentler.

Coming back with an update… I am officially a P39 convert! I have been leaving the top of my head until the very last when washing and just run my hands through and over the top of my head rather than massaging it in like I do on the rest of my hair and it has worked… I don’t have ginger roots! I have nothing against ginger, I just don’t want it on my head.

I’ve been doing two P39 washes and one normal shampoo wash and this works well for me. The ancient blonde has a deeper caramel colour to it and the top half isn’t that far off. I think I’ve done about 10 P39 washes in the last 6 weeks. I try and wash my hair twice a week.

If you’re thinking about giving it a try, go for it!

What a bizarre post. What exactly is wrong with looking older? I say it as someone in my early 40s with no greys yet. I wouldn't give a flying fuck it someone thought I was 60, so what?

I did that. It took me two years to grow out my waistlength hair that I previously had dyed blond. It looks like shit.
Im back off to the hairdresser for a low lights style balyage.
The combination of mouse and white made me look 20 years older.

Bleach London Fade to Grey saved my life when I transitioned. It darkens the white a bit and makes brown much ashier which blends in the demarcation lines.
I always recommend it, if someone hadn't already.

I too dreamed of the long glossy grey hair I'd have when I stopped dyeing it. In the end it is now a lovely colour with a mix of grey shades but no matter what deep conditioning and other gubbins I put on it, the texture of a brillo pad at the ends. So, I've just gone for a big chop.

I find this interesting too, there doesn’t seem to be any awareness of the fact that they are acquainting ‘old’ with being a negative thing.

Right now I dream of getting old as being an issue. Rather than the horrific alternative.

I feel the same. I'm the age I am, and I really don't mind looking it. I find it very sad that Mary Beard, mentioned upthread, is seen as looking unkempt. I see an interesting and vivacious woman, and wouldn't notice her hair if it wasn't pointed out.

I last dyed my hair in 2014, age 43 it took two years with it being cut into a short bob to get the bulk of the colour our once it was about halfway down my head. I wouldn’t say that it’s aging at all and more people than ever are ditching the dye. If you start and change your mind it’s not the end of the world.

I haven’t dyed mt hair in twenty years, I'm mid 40s and don’t intend to start. I’ve a few grey strands but will let it come through naturally and leave it at that