Flattering-do you always choose to wear clothes that disguise your ‘flaws’ or ‘shortcomings’ or do you just wear what you want regardless?

[Ridingaroundonbuses]

I hate the word flattering as for me it’s synonymous with the word ‘slimming’ and making people look smaller.

As someone who has slimmed down a lot ( double digit dress size to single dress size) I don’t make it the primary reason for my outfit choices. For example I am petite and wearing wide leg jeans with chunky boots which I am sure don’t make me look taller but which I feel put together in.

I always try to find something flattering. Which is a bit miserable but there we go.

I struggle to find flattering so I wear whatever.

The older I get, the less I care about this. Obviously I don't want to look awful but if I like something I'll wear it. My mum is over 80 and still has lots of 'rules' about what you should/shouldn't wear - mostly seem to be based on size and I think that's just miserable. If I think something suits me then I don't worry about if it makes me look short or my bum big or whatever.

Flattering is really important to me, and yes, to me that means slimming. Being fashionable is also important, so I tend to follow trends.

I wear what I like. I’m interested in fashion and try to look put together. I get that some stuff suits me more than others and guess I wouldn’t wear something if I thought I looked horrible in it. But recently ordered quite a boxy cardigan which probably makes me look bigger than I am and I nearly sent it back but have decided to keep it. But of a balance I guess.

100% flattering. I won’t be drawn to something if I think it looks a mess on me. I like to incorporate trends but wouldn’t wear things just because they are fashionable.

I am fat and middle aged. No item of clothing will make me look slim. I used to worry about concealing my stomach ( typical apple shape). But now I have realised I only.need to dress for me and what makes me happy. I am not going to wait until I slim down, or am worthy enough for an item of clothing. I don't have to wear what other people ( or what I think other people) would want me to wear. I dress for me and in stuff that makes me happy. Life is too short. I don't think I will ever think on my death bed that wearing dungarees was a giant regret because they made me look like a teletubby.

I dress to disguise my horrible big boobs.

A bit of both? I don't think I'd wear something that was obviously the wrong size or that exposed a lot of my torso in everyday life, for example, but I'm also choosing clothes for a wider spread of criteria than just "does it make me look fat or not" - colour, fabric, level of formality, comfort, suitability for what I will be doing, etc etc.

Always something flattering. I am pear shaped and dress for my shape. I always want to cover my bum a bit and wouldn't want anything clingy around the stomach either.

Mostly flattering. I'd always choose a v neck over a high neck top due to big boobs, however I'm also happy to stick on a hoodie.
I wouldn't wear a cropped top thanks to wobbly stretchmarked belly or a short skirt as these do look terrible on me.

I always try for flattering. I couldn't feel 'happy' in anything that makes me look fatter and shorter than I am, regardless of dopamine colours etc.

I'm 53 though, I see loads of younger women wearing 'unflattering' stuff with gusto.

The main priority is how it feels to wear - it has to be comfortable and 'me' to enjoy wearing. I never used to worry about flattering but now I have middle age spread I do think about that a bit more.

I'm fat and wear clothes that bring me joy.

Always appropriately covered but don't think about flattering.

Today is purple jeans and a rainbow knit jumper. 🌈

Yes - I don’t like my stomach so try to disguise/hide it. I wouldn’t feel joyful with my stomach on display.

I used to think I was disguising my G cup boobs, but in reality i was just making the rest of me look huge! I now wear well fitting bras, and avoid tops that skim over them making my waist look enormous! I find fitted is better than loose, and will happily wear a good pair of leggings / jeans with a vest top tucked in and an open shirt / cardigan / fleece.

‘Flattering’ makes me think of my mother hating Sinéad O’Connor on tv and muttering about could she not ‘make a bit more of herself’. For her, SO’C’s ultimate crime was not ripping up a photo of the Pope on tv, but being confident despite not dressing like the Rose of Tralee and having a lovely perm.

No, ‘flattering’ isn’t in my top concerns when buying clothes.

I’ve really started to challenge myself that flattering means it has to make me look thinner.

I bought a lovely floaty unstructured summer dress this year, which I would normally avoid, in case it makes me look pregnant. It ended up being my favourite outfit of the whole summer. I’ve got a couple of boxy jumpers which aren’t ‘slimming’ but they are great colours on me and really warm.

I don't particularly think about my 'flaws' or 'shortcomings' when I'm choosing clothes - that seems like a very negative way to see oneself. I choose clothes that fit well, are comfortable, and look nice. I suppose that means they don't cling to bits of me that are more wobbly 😅 but I don't see that as a shortcoming.

Bit of a mixture. I try to dress in a flattering way, i don't like my arms so i rarely wear short sleeves, and i suit blue so tend to wear cornflower blue, navy etc... i dress modestly at work.

But I'm not a slave to dressing to hide my flaws. And tbh as I'm a size 18, no matter what i wear I will not look slim.

I've got a bit of a tummy so I don't wear tight dresses eg.
I also hate the bit of belly that sticks out when wearing jeans and a shorter top.
Generally don't tuck things in either.

I do try dress flattering which means trying to hide a belly roll or hide any fat I have. I wouldn’t wear a top that clinged to me because I’d feel to uncomfortable.

Flattering is one of the criteria. It comes after warmth (and very occasionally keeping cool) and other practical issues.
Flattering definitely isn't just about 'slimming'.

I do make some decisions that are not the most flattering e.g. I like tan boots whereas people with short legs are often advised to have boots in the same colour as the tights so black would probably look better.

I agree with you op. I went through a spell of obsessing about whether clothes flattered my body shape - aka made my arse look smaller - and it made me feel very negative about my perfectly normal body. I literally saw myself as a series of flaws needing to be fixed. I'm so glad I snapped out of it

I know fashion can be very, very silly but I'll never believe it's any more silly than only wearing clothes that make you look thinner.

Just on the topic... i follow an fb page called Totes Inappropres... she dresses in some pretty outrageous and, sometimes bloody awful clothes and has the most unflattering haircut... she talks a lot about dressing for yourself, what you like, what's fun. And wouldn't it be boring if we all looked the same. I like that message.